Dumpling no more - only the strong survive and we did No.3

[Teaandcakeplease]

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without him by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong

This thread is for ex dumplings. Any dumpling that feels like she has "mostly" moved past crisis into an "almost" sorted state can post and chat here as we continue our quest for serenity with a lot of laughs along the way and support.

Hmm thats interesting I can see how if I am not careful that could be the case. I suppose its a balance of being honest but not too honest maybe ? Loving the idea of the unbiased guiding but by definition thats quite hard isnt it

Anyway I just rang them they arent back from school and they are both raging around Costcutter with their mates - even older dc get hyped by red nose day !

You know they always say something good comes out of bad and actually I am finding it quite liberating to think I dont need to over shelter the dc (not that this incident has been that bad)and they can make up their own minds

Thanks Patience x

And yes where is offschool ?

thats it getting ,this life experience has opened our eyes so much,and helped us mature emotionally we can 'KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON' better than most.It has been the making of us ,Xs didnt make this emotional journey yet.
'oversheltering' is what my mother did,most definately.But it isnt a true version of real life.We all need to be able to face bad news head on,thats all part of growing up .Such a shock when bad news ,mean people hapPatienceobtainspen in our adult life if we have never been shown the skills to handle such situations by the adults in our lives .I just wanted my feelings validated ,listened to not swept under the carpet as if I didnt matter.I could have been shown that i didnt have control over other peoples actions and just to concentrate on myself, but to have my pov ignored just taught me my opinion didnt matter and it BLOODY WELL DOES !!!!

Unbiased is our 'Test' getting.
We all are tempted everyday or given tests.
My test is not to talk negatively re gf ,dont want to give X a reason to say i made it awkward for him to see the kids or for them to lose out financially.
Wouldnt take much....
and what is done is done now.
If she remains on the scene I will have to remain unbiased re a 21yo barmaid with no friends looking after my kids .
Mostly im cool about situation but the care of dcs we are still at the not while there is still breath in my body stage.
But all tests of our inner peace i think and emotional stability .

Getting, sounds like you've been on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster with all that's happened with xh & ds. Glad you're feeling strong & doing ok. My dc's are a lot younger but I know how hard it can be with situations like this arise & you feel the need to try to resolve things for dc's sake.

Patience, lol at you were just amazed I was able to eat anything with tooth extraction!! too true, too true!!

Which reminds me Pink, yes I running tongue over hole . You've obviously been there with that nougat of expertise . Hope you're well

Mumfun, yes I can actually get on very well with xh on a one to one but like you being seen with him in public makes me feel v uncomfortable.

Anyway, xh rang me earlier today & was asking my advice on how he can best make up what he did in past to dc's & should he talk about it directly to them etc. So I took the opportunity & said if he had anyone he wanted to introduce to dc's I would be fine with that providing it was handled sensitively & that he let me know beforehand etc. He said he planned on staying on his own for the foreseeable but agreed to this & said likewise he would be supportative of me introducing them to someone but would equally like to know etc. All very mature reality of course could be different on his side i.e. him being supportative of me having a new man but will cross that bridge if I ever get to it!!

Forecast here was for snow but turned out to be a fab day. I wrapped dc's up well & headed to beach with buckets & shovels etc. Within two mins they were all soaked so ended up striping them off & they had a ball. They're all showered now tg & am off to tackle a car full of sand!!

Hope everyone is doing well. I was also wondering how Offschool is doing & Warriorqueen.

Spring meet up anyone?

Starting hows the writing down what you want from a man and lots of positive thinking survey going ?

Just finished car as there's no tired smiley!!

Getting, the writing down & visualisation went fine but no man appeared yet anyway

Yes me too starting could do with crossing paths with someone x

Does Facebook cost anything to join,will I be contacted by eejits if I have one with my own name ?

It's free and you can have your settings so only friends of friends can find you on there or no one at all

Thanks T but I'm still a bit of a scaredy

Well I could set it up for you with very high security and then you could change the password if you like?

Sorry I love fb

Think I will just wait for a bit.........no rush

Patience, I'm like you on fb, clueless & allergic . Think Tea's offer is good

Agree FB not for me although would have said that about MN a year ago

I have just seen the thread about EdgarAleNPie's DS and i have cried my eyes out, this is not someone i have come across before on here but her news and the message she posted about her ds had me sobbing
I think it shifted some things back into perspective for me, a total strangers loss has touched me so much, i didnt want to intrude and post on her thread with my condolences as i dont feel right about it but i did want to express it somehow and where better than where i feel safe....here

It's just so sad

Morning everyone

Had a great nights sleep and the sun is shining

Sov I am not familiar with the thread but I know what you mean. My friend at lunch yesterday was talking about a close friend who only has a short time to live and how it will be a relief etc. It makes you realise life can throw so many awful things at you and maybe after all losing an H isnt so bad...

Edgar has been around for quite a while on mumsnet, I've always enjoyed her posts as a kind, friendly and bubbly person. She has an elder DD and little 7 month old DD and her 2 year old son was the same age as mine whose passed away. It's awful. Her thread is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/bereavement/1157339-doctor-appt-friday-for-DS-sicky-off-balance-bad-ears

I've been hugging and kissing my children a whole lot since I read her thread yesterday.

Hi everyone. Just got back from my course thingy at the hotel. It was very posh and lovely to spend time with the other girls, two of whom I know, other two were lovely. Then went into town and had drink with girls from the village. They were also lovely but never again. I've gone back a few steps. It's too painful :(

Ooo Googoo many ((hugs)) lovely lady. I can imagine all the stirred up emotions from missing the village and everyone.

Ahhh, Goo, that's a shame. Glad that you had a nice time with the women on the course though.

Happy where are yoooooooo ? Are you ok ??

Hi all. Well after your shout out Pink, I just had to appear!

Am lurking always but always feeling a bit behind with everyone's posts.

And hard to comment when you're not feeling on top of what's happening IYSWIM

Getting, am as always impressed by the steady route you are taking through everything.

Goo, hope you are recovering from village experience.

Patience, so glad you can now post tunes.

Starting am awaiting the next adventure with xh. So good though that he is seeing dcs at least kind of successfully.

Tea, today I went to the holy spirit day. Kind of ok but actually felt more at the London thing I did that afternoon (need to try to go there again)

Waves to Sov, Pink and MumFun et al.

Preparations now well advanced for my party next weekend. This time next week huh.

Am also sorting out DS birthday.

Oh dear God I read that link you posted Tea, it is so so heartbreaking to think of their pain . Life is shit sometimes & there's no acceptable answers!!

Goo, sorry that meeting women was so emotional but I can understand that it's probably too hard to separate then fron exbf ((Hugs))

Happy, good to see you back posting & seems like lots of fun happening in casa Happy!! Well let me get one thing clear there will be no adventures happening with xh but actually you are right in that I need to start planning my next adventure! Am wondering should I dust myself down & get back to the delights of internet dating . It's either that or hope that someone will approach me in the aisles of Tesco some day . Am losing my youth fast here, need a plan of action!!