thinking of cutting my wrists

[onelastchance]

or some other way of ending it all

ring tomorrow and say it is an emergency, say you are on ADs and had suicidal thoughts at the weekend and you need an emergency appointment.

OP, please go down there and WAIT. Bloody Doctor's receptionists will not prioritise you. Demand (nicely, it's an urgent, personal matter) to speak to the Dr, and say you will come and wait until he can see you.

PLEASE YOU ARE THAT IMPORTANT!

This is important, it was serious, it needs to be dealt with and thankfully, it can be dealt with quickly, all you really need is 15 mins or so with a Dr, and a new script.

Otherwise the A&E is a good idea, although having been sent to the Emergency Psych, it can be a bit scary in itself... OK this was a long time ago, but they lumped addicts and depressive, MH patients in together where I was sent.. Hard core!

Please try not to shut your DH out, he's trying to help you, and you talking about it and opening up, sharing it will help you.

I was given a script for citalopram last year and it absolutely terrified me. I felt in a black hole and quite suicidial when I hadn't before I took the tablets.

Please do as the others suggest and see a doctor as soon as you can. Things will get better.

lint, I felt dreadful too when diagnosed, it sounds so dreadful, but taking the medicine does help. You can't ignore depression, it needs to be treated.

had beeb feeling a bit better during week then last night i asked dh for a cuddle and he said he was watching tv. I felt such awful rejection and got so upset and angry. Tod him to F off, threw things - i told him it was because i felt rejected and hoped he's then be nice nd cuddle me. Instead he insisted that watching tv isn't rejecting me and he should be allowed to watch tv.
So sad again :(

wanted him to acknoweldge i might have felt so bad becuase and changed then stopped my ads. shall i call him

Did you stop ADs on your own accord?
if so, why?
Are you seeing/talking to your GP/Psychologist regularly?

I have not read everything, will go over it in after this.
Just wonted to say you sound just like me.
My dp wont make any plans he only ever feels sorry when I'm upset if someone else upset me (if he did he ignores me) I often feel that people don't understand me or how I feel.
I have two children, if I feel very upset and I dont feel I can get support from dp. I go and cuddle up to them, even if they are sleeping. It makes me remember whatever happens they are most important and they need you more then anything. Your little boy needs you.
Believe me you are not the only one who has these feelings you are not alone, please keep fighting. You can be strong and beat these feelings.

yes, i stopped them becuase they were making me put on weight. Then i found some prozac i'd been given last year and started on thAT for 2 days then stopped.

thanks im2 :)

just clled him and he apologised for mking me feel rejected. Then all went wrong again as i said i wanted him to cuddle me after i' d said i felt rejected - he then just said i was too unapproachable so i put the phine down s was so upset again Wish i hadn't called at all now

OLC, you can't just dick about with AD FGS. Prozac for 2 days won't do a thing, it takes a good couple of weeks to kick in, as do most of them.

Depression is a serious, life threatening illness.

Go to the Drs and tell them you need medication, that you don't want to put on weight and what your symptoms are, ie are you anxious, or lethargic etc. There a million AD drugs out there, one will suit you.

Have you tried CBT? Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? it saved my life, teaching me to slow down, stop and challenge panic/black spiralling thoughts and highlight the truths. No-one thought I'd survive, not even my own therapist. I saw her notes, they fully expected me to die.

10 years on, I'm still here! Come on girl, you can do this, take a deep breath and really challenge these thoughts you are having. Your DH is entitled to watch the telly, if you want to cuddle him, go and sit next to him, hold his hand. Don't stand there pouting that he won't get up and come and cuddle you... Go to him.

Give HIM love, give him affection and he'll give it right back. You are very defensive/prickly at the moment, but it's the depression doing that, not you.

Take the YOU inside back, fight the depression. It can't win, it really can't.

seeing gp on thursday.

dh been on phone i've been having a go at him, saying i wanted to die, that he wouldn't be happy til i was dead, now he's very angry with me

OLC, understandably. Your DH is there with you, this is hard for him to watch. You don't want to die, that's the depression that wants to kill you. FIGHT IT!

He would be forever miserable if you did die, your DC will never, ever recover and it will hurt your family for generations.

You know it's not the right thing to do. You know that for sure.

Think of a mantra if you can. Today I shall live. Or 'stare' your depression down and shout at it, tell it you are better than that, stronger than that and you will win.

Depression thrives on isolation, that's why it's making you scream at your DH. If he gives up and goes, the depression will whisper see, told you.

FIGHT BACK at what's causing this, not at who is trying to help.

OLC - LittleMiss is write, you really shouldn't just stop without weaning off ADs. I took Mirtazapine which made me put over half a stone on in 4 weeks.

I went back to my GP and he weaned me off them, onto another.

2 days of Prozac will do nothing.

PLEASE go back to your GP. TODAY!

Re your Dh, he's picking up on your low mood and depression. I should imagine that you've been blowing hot and cold too so he's a bit unsure what he'll get from one minute to the next.

I know I was like that with my DH for ages until I went to get help.

It's just as hard for him you know? I agree that YOU holding HIM, telling him you miss him, love him, need him will help.

Maybe he's scared of making you worse? Or you rejecting him?

Start with your GP. You need help and support. CBT is also a good idea.

Talk to your GP about a referal or for more information.

'right' not write.

If you are feeling suicidal you really need see a medical professional NOW and not later in the week.

Call your gp surgery and request to to speak to your GP and explain your feelings right now.

Samaritans info here too

10mg of citalopram is not enough.

You can't stop medication and start new ones and stop without a GP telling you too and 2 days will do nothing.

You need to see a GP today and you need to find a way of explaining to your husband what depression means. Tell him it is like any other illness and is a chemical inbalance in the brain and the medication sorts that.

I missed that Four - 10mg? So the starting dose?

You should only be on that for 2-4 weeks and it should then be increased gradually, (10 or 20mg at a time, over a number of weeks) whilst you being monitored to see how you react.

You need to go back TODAY OLC.

Is 10mg the starting dose for Citalopram? I started taking them before Christmas and was put straight onto 20mg on the basis that it was the starting dose. This was confirmed by the enclosed leaflet which stated that 10mg is only be prescribed for panic attacks and that for treatment of depression it starts at 20mg.

OLC, can I give you a big unMN hug and agree that you need to be given an emergency appointment. The receptionists are trained to respond to certain key words and phrases and I'd be very surprised if "suicidal thoughts" aren't amongst them. Tell them you had these and ask how they can help you.

It depends on your 'history' too. If you have been on other ADs, which OLC has, they like to introduce a new drug more slowly.

My GP and I had a really long chat about everything available, how best to start taking an AD, for how long, increases etc.

Also, we don't know what OLC has told her GP, her reasons for being on them IYSWIM.

Aaaaahhhhh ... thanks Mouse

OLC how've you been today?

got through the day ok.felt bd again in the evening like dh didn't really understand. had a go at him and told him to leave me alone...so he did. later i asked him to come back. I know what's sets me off alot - rejection, or perceived rejection. said i wanted to be a baby again, and that made me cry