Ok I'm going to lay it all on the line here. I'm leaving my DP in two weeks time and since this became official, the cloud in my head is starting to clear and I'm becomming concerned with what is emmerging. That is, signs that he perhaps has or is abusing his DD.
Please just bare with me because my head is like spaghetti. I'll try and be brief and concise. His daughter is 13 and has continuously wet the bed, apparantly right from when she was potty trained, she has never been completely "dry". She has had numerous hospital appointments but they can never find anything wrong, they just say she'll grow out of it but this shows no sign of happening. More disturbing is the fact that when she sleeps out, it NEVER happens. She wets the bed here almost every night yet last year she went on a week long residential trip and never wet the bed once. When she stays at friend's houses she never wets the bed. When she has friends over it never happens either. I should've been suspitious about this to start with BUT the problem was he was never alone with her. There was never really any time when he could be doing something to her because I would've heard or seen SOMETHING. But I never did. I would never normally accuse anyone of this but something is not right and I've been thinking this for a while now but I've not done anything because I honestly cannot see HOW he would manage it iyswim? I'm always around. But I would be lying if I said I didnt have any concerns about him at all. He is a strange person, lies about the most stupid things, constantly acting secretive and odd. I found porn on his computer last year, some of it was quite "young" barely legal stuff. I pulled him up on it. The "young" stuff he reckoned just popped up with the other pages.
I don't know what to beleive because SHE acts wierd too. When she walks past him she strokes his head etc, it almost seems a bit too intimate or maybe I'm being paranoid? She's constantly asking him for hugs and asking him to "go and see her" in her bedroom and when he does, they shut the bedroom door now I'm not for one minute suggesting she is instigating anything but I know she craves attention and I'm concerned that she perhaps see's ANY attention from her dad as being positive? He almost seems scared of her too, like she has some kind of a hold on him. For instance she has a rabit which is NOT looked after and the poor thing is neglected. We decided we would rehome it. She kicked off. Later that night he was in her room, door closed etc etc and when he came back down he'd TOTALLY changed his mind of rehoming the rabbit. Now I know this could be innocent whinging playing a part but something is telling me I've been a fool and something is wrong.
As I say I'm leaving so I wanted to put this out now to you and get "feedback" on whether I am being paranoid/dillusional etc. I was abused as a child so maybe this is clouding my judgement?
I can't help thinking even if he ISN'T doing anything now because I'm here, was he when it was just the two of them? is that why he's looking forward to me moving out? I'm really hoping you all come on now and tell me I'm talking shite and being paranoid.