Chin Up and Tits Out for the Recently Ditched No. 11

[Teaandchristmascakeplease]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether you are a new dumpling or a vet, feel free to join us in our quest for serenity

[shocked]

Well, her parents won't be too pleased when they find out...

fairy

citydoll thats exactly what he said to me about seeing him through his darkest moments , I havent read that on MN before I dont think. It wouldnt have been so bad if we had known they were having dark moments

googoo you arent on this thread either hope all is ok

Fairy :( Some men can be such pigs.

My ex is being a total twunt faced asshat today

It's a good job I don't ever see him face to face any more, I'd dearly love to smack him one today, and if I get one more self-pitying text from the muppet I may well go round and shove his phone up his arse (wouldn't actually do it but I feel like I could grrrrr!)

oh apparantly she is 18 and i should fuck off for saying he is a peado

Fairy, have you spoken to him?

no lc i dont want him to hear me crying ,i text him,feel like my life has just fell apart big time

Ok. Don't phone him and don't send any more texts if you can possibly stop yourself. On the other hand, don't berate yourself if you do. I was like a woman possessed at times.

At least things will start to fit into place for you now.

And if it's any comfort, the chances of his new relationship surviving is negligible. She'll soon get bored of him.

Are the dc's ok?

have steped away from the phone,after admitting it he then became very abusive,just cant believe he could hurt me like this.
kids ok,older 2 know,they feel sick as they are 11 and 13 she is nearer their age

oh Fairy it's such early days and very very raw. I would say not to speak to him for a few days unless you have to, just try getting your head round whats's happened.

It's awful and it hurts like hell and I am so sorry that you are going through this. My heart is wrenching for you.

Because, we understand, because we've been there.

Oh fairy - how awful for you. He's a bastard abusing you - you speak the truth - this GIRL is young enough to be his daughter. It's sad as he's clearly picking someone young and vunerable enough to think what he's doing is OK. make made a great point to me the other night that when they go for young girls, the girls have no idea what they're doing - until you have DC you can't understand what you are doing to that family!

I was the one who mentioned Dad's out with DC - gets me every time. Keep spending time with friend's whose DH/P's come home with a kiss and smile for all the family. I well up every time - am not jealous, happy for them but am envious. I miss it

XH has gone off with someone older than me with 2 DC of her own - I cannot fathom how she can be OK with it- having Dc herself anD knowing he's walked away from a 14mo baby! He must have spun that sob story!!

Fairy, he was abusive because he knows his vile secret is out. Anger is his only defence. He's in a corner. You won't get anything rational out of him for a while.

You might feel like your life has fallen apart and maybe tonight it has but you will get your life back again and, whatever happens, it WILL be a better life.

Goat, my xp's ow was older than me and has an adopted dd age 6 with sn. Some women have very low standards. Although it is well documented that I don't believe the ow in my case is actually fully female and I'm not joking either. Especially when she sent xp a text to sy she would leave her little girl to be with him .

Good god lc - where do they find them!?! That's horrific!!

Goat, they're welcome to each other. Perfect match. And she's married too.

Fairy, you're going to be ok. I promise.

Hello everyone,
fairy he will get his comeuppance and you will come out of this stronger and better just hang in there, it is tough going especially in the early days but eventually you get to a place where they can't hurt you anymore.
lc They deserve each other fuckwits the pair of em.
I'm doing ok my ds 2 was 3 today and we had a nice day. x was around in the evening in a mega huff but after being reminded that it was ds day and he was lucky to have been included he snapped out of it.
Sometimes i get these moments of coldness and wonder how I didn't just get out before although I have my 3 fab boys as a result of trying again. there were lots of good things about us but also some extremely bad things that he did in the past but after a while it all got v blurred and confusing and I blamed some of his v bad behaviour on me or rather he did and i believed him. Its just a bit of a shock sometimes to have been taken for such a fool. And the lies and lies and lies just skew your idea of reality.
However life goes on the heart still beats and the legs still walk and the mornings get brighter in February.
:)

thanks everyone,still cant take it in,why do they bloody lie,why make me the last to know,he must really hate me to have everyone else knowing apart from me,i have been made such a fool of,my life is a complete joke,going to bed as just so exhausted.

Your life isn't a joke - I so identify with that feeling but it's NO JOKE. You put into something with an open heart and mind. That makes you normal. He's the liar, he's the joke. Hold your head up high - you did nothing wrong fairy. Sleep well

Well done maybee. Happy birthday to DS2. I know what you mean about the lies! You want to believe this person you love isn't the utter selfish twunt they keep showing you they are. It's a twisted form of self preservation.

Fairy cry if u can cry ,rage if u can rage ,life is all about you now I've said it b 4 but ray mears knows nothing about survival ,we are the experts on this.Keep posting I felt like something died when I heard my X was seeing a 21 yo he is 41yo.
All to fuel his ego. She is just an object that he can brag about in the pub to his impotent middle aged friends.that is the irony of this we grow strong enough to become world leaders and the weakest of our species are getting chatted up by our deluded X s .I agree fairy they are children but emotionally our men are the same age.

They lie because they are cowards.
He has humiliated himself only NOT u .

Fairy, I hope you get some sleep. He doesn't hate you but he doesn't respect you either. Thing is, once this is all played out the person he will hate most is himself. And nobody will ever respect him for what he has done. Your life is not a joke. You are a Very Important Person. Don't ever lose sight of that.

Maybee, glad you had a good day with ds. I can't believe the number of people on this thread with very young dc's. And I can't wait for the lighter mornings and evenings too.

Goat, how long has your ex been with ow? I can't remember the details.

They worked together and have been 'friends' ever since our first split at beginning of last year. They moved in together the day he left here

Yoohoo, Patience.
I'm having a better day today. Had first session with mental health practitioner today and then got my haircut. Now I have to decide when to go back to work. I am still very vulnerable and my job conditions are not ideal - night shifts, no peer support. Going back to see doc tomorrow.

Still keep thinking about your bus fare comment. It was a real turning point .

Well done LC really pleased you are getting there slowly. I must try and remember to ring the NHS counselling tomorrow, keep forgetting and then ringing just after 1600 when they are closed. Can work not change your hours for a while? Even my work offered to change my hours.

Fairy my DH left for a woman 27years younger than him!! His ex exW thinks he is a dirty bas*rd, and his children think he is sick, she is only 3 years older than his eldest DC. Why cant they see its wrong? That is something I will never understand that everyone thinks it is wrong and wont last and yet they seem to think that it will.

Hi Romney.
How are you feeling?

Hi everyone. I haven't had time to post for a couple of days but I'm thinking of you all and hoping you are well. Sending you all love and will read everything tomorrow :)