Hi, have namechanged for this - don't even know if I have spelt "ostracized" right. Basically, dh and I had an argument almost three weeks ago and he has hardly spoken to me since. He has done this kind of thing before - namely once for 5 weeks two years ago. Then I was desperate for the sulking to stop and eventually got him out of it by "approaching him" in bed. This time however we are a lot more distant and angry with each other and don't sleep in the same bed. I am too pissed off with his general behaviour with me during normal times to approach him physically. This behaviour is fairly companionable but distant during the week and very critical and complaining at the weekends. To the point that I withdraw and become a shadow of my "during the week" self.
During this most recent bout of sulking I have been thinking why on earth should I force someone to talk to me who obviously doesn't want to, though the whole situation does make me sad. Plus we went to see his family this weekend and the sulking didn't stop him saying several critical lecturing things and being generally rude a few times. I was also called "pathetic" on friday. So it seems he can stop talking to me but also "interact" if he needs to 
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What worries me this time is that I fear that unless I make some move towards him, he will never talk to me properly again. He has a tendency to do this - he hasn't talked to my sister properly since they had an argument a year and a half ago and doesn't talk to two of his own sisters at all.
I clearly need to say to him that we need to go to counselling. If it was just us I could move on but we have kids. BUT I am scared of suggesting anything for fear of being shouted down. I don't feel I have the strength to deal with how upset I become if he starts being horrible.
Not saying I haven't contributed to the "relationship" being in the sorry state it is, but he is the one who is uncompromising, bossy, critical and complaining.
I clearly have to do something about this but there NEVER seems to be a good time. Dh CONSTANTLY on laptop working and he doesn't seem to care that things are crap between us.
There are lots of things I don't like about him at the moment and he probably feels my dislike, but I am not the one who is so difficult. I am far more laid-back and far less critical. Plus I would love to be able to talk about our non relationship, but he dictates what we can and can't talk about.