How do you feel about prostitution?

[BillieH]

Hello everyone, I have name changed for this(no sinister reason) but i do post on here from time to time.

Anyway, I would love to know what your thoughts are on prostitution. I don't mean political views and I dont really want to get into a discussion on whether girls are trafficked, pimped, druggies. Just what you think as a whole.

I am talking about girls who willing become escorts or work in massage parlours under the guise of 'masseuses' when really they provide extras.

What do you think of men who see them? Are that losers, sad and lonely, 'sex addicts'or what? Would you think your dp/dh was cheating if he saw a prostitute.

I ask just out of curiosity, I do not think my dp has ever visited a prostitute! Also, apparently 1 in 10 men see prostitutes. Do you agree with this. If this is true what hope do we all have eh?

My take is that i belive some girls use their looks to earn money an 'easy' way. By easy, I mean that they do not have to train for yrs to get a decent paid job, or they do not have to work 9 to 5 in an office when they can earn a wks wages in a day.

I have asked my own dp and he beleives that there is something missing from a relationship if a man sees a prostitute.Obviously its different with a single man. He also thinks that some men have issues sexually with their wives/partners and are inhibited. Therefore, that is why they pay for sex acts that they can't ask for at home. These are exactly my thoughts.Anyone agree or disagree?

I'd like your thoughts or experiences!

Oh look another trolling "granny".

i would rather that a woman was 'paid' by the government than feel she had no choice other than to have sex for money - i thought that was the whole point of the welfare state - that is was there in a time of hardship and emergency. as to being a mother of 4 and a grandmother of 3, what exactly has that to do with your argument?

i also find the term 'working girl' offensive, i think it belittles women and helps to reinforce to some men that they are dealing with little inferior creatures - these are women, at least give them the respect of being called so!

Did anybody else notice that the trolling "granny" used the term "WG" - nobody outside of prostitution ever uses that term to refer to prostitutes.

It is the purchase of women by men that should spark outrage.

Well said, Jesuswhatnext!

I too find the appropriation of the term "working girl" by prostitutes to be highly offensive and objectionable.

I, and all the decent women here, are the real working girls, we work hard and honestly, we look after our children - which is a damn sight more than the lying prostitutes with their "disabled" clients do.

One thing that is quite disconcerting is that apart from the constant need for derogatory terms to denigrate and abuse anyone who steps outside the narrow definitions of morality and feminism dictated by a very loud minority of posters, is the general lack of basic manners and courtesy. Out of curiosity, do those of you, who attack and belittle other posters, speak like that in real life to people you just encountered? Does the anonymity of sitting behind a screen erode all sense of how to have a respectful debate? Do you screech down and verbally abuse anyone from especially an older generation who is seeking to keep up with modern means of communication if you speak face to face? Is this kind of cyber bullying and overbearing attitude something you feel you can justify because you are not speaking to a real person?

There are some interesting and very intelligent Mumsnetters who asked questions and put their points across in a civil manner. They keep getting drowned out and are even attacked themselves for merely affording us some basic courtesy. Just because someone does not wish to verbally abuse those of working in the sex industry dos neither make them trolls or sympathisers. It just makes them open minded, tolerant and inquisitive people who are able to accept that there are various forms of family and sex lives.

And perhaps you ought to worry less what terminology is used. I think the term WG is a lot less condescending and derogative than the bile piled on us for most of this thread.

It seems solidarity is only extended to those that accept the opinions dictated to them by people who have no actual experience of the industry. It isn?t gospel that this lien of work is evil simply because you proclaim it to be. Women who do an AA style confession of ?I am a prostitute and victim? are then treated with condescending pity and the odd charitable cake. Anyone who refutes that stereotype and say ?no actually I made a choice and can speak for myself? gets abused and objectified and patronised.

I don?t mind the term prostitute unless it is hissed with venom and used together with negative attributes. Like other marginalised groups, anyone within this circle can adopt a term and cancel out its negative connotation by wearing the name with pride and dignity.

I'm wondering what 'abuse' and 'respect' looks like in your world Honey, apparently paying for sex is not abuse, using a woman is not abuse, speaking kindly whilst you're paying for sex is 'respect'..seems to me unless someone is either paying or agreeing with you they are guilty of abuse and disrespect.

If i met you in person I would have qualms in delivering my point of view. I am not embarrassed to condemn the way you get money, I am liberated enough to be able to see exploitation. The patriarchal trick of convincing you that by the price you set you are empowered by is very clever and I don't blame you for falling for it. But it is a trick and you are the victim.

"gets abused and objectified and patronised" mhm

surely that's the role of the punter.

I'm also wondering how punternetters come here and tell us about sleeping with our husbands, sons etc and manage to escape accusations?

Oh Dear !! You really are such small minded females/mothers. I am so glad my children did not grow up like any of you.

The retort I expected, because I do not agree with you I am not right ......... WRONG. What is so different between a trolling granny and a trolling mum. Absolutely none .............. as I am a mother too.

If you cannot see the bile and excrement in this thread THEN YOU must be absolutely brain dead ... even my grandchildren could see it ........................ Most of the postings on here contain verbal diarrhoea.

You seem to think all working girls do so under duress. Nothing of what I have read on this thread implies this. Not all working girls are used and abused .................... far from it as far as I can read. Many if not most choose to work in the industry (I know you don?t believe this but it really does show your small mindedness) and DO NOT work as prostitutes because THEY HAVE NO CHOICE. Nothing could be further from the truth with many of the girls. What is in a name anyway ................. absolutely nothing. I could actually call women who do not work and live off their husbands wages a name but I would not lower myself to your level. How does it feel down in the gutter looking up at everyone else. Because you are not working in the adult industry it does not mean your opinion is any more correct than anyone elses .................. something you fail to realise.

Has anyone noticed its the prostitutes that talk eloquently and the ?good old stay at home mums? that are using the maledictions. I really wonder just how your children are going to grow up ! I dread to think.

EA you wrote - I, and all the decent women here, are the real working girls, we work hard and honestly, we look after our children - which is a damn sight more than the lying prostitutes with their "disabled" clients do. ? How on earth can you call yourself and the other females on here ?decent? when all you do is echo others postings and never seem to have an original thought yourself. Each and every female on here, whether working as a prostitute or a mum has every right to be called a working girl, so do you want me to call you a working girl .................. I dont think so. If a female can support herself ? in whatever way she chooses ? whether by being a prostitute or any other occupation ? then she deserves praise and not the insults that all the others are throwing at them.

I haven't managed to read all the posts yet (but I will because it is fascinating) so forgive me if this has been asked before. I wondered if those posters who are really really anti prostitution would do it if they really had no other way of feeding their children, or paying for the roof over their heads or heating their homes?
I'm not talking about those who do it through choice (and it IS their choice and I am very much live and let live) but suppose, for arguments sake, that the government decided to persecute single mothers even more than they already are, and stopped paying benefits. Completely. You lose your job, there is no housing benefit, no council tax benefit, no income support or tax credits. Ex is no longer paying maintenance...you really are on your uppers with no one to turn to for help. Would you consider prostitution then? I'm merely playing devil's advocate here.

Also just wanted to add that someone poked fun at the suggestion that prostitutes have degrees...I know a prostitute and she is a lawyer, very intelligent lady. Just thought I'd throw that in.

So now you're claiming prostitutes have a choice? Really? So Tesco pay the same as a punter now, wow. No prostitute fucks for free, she names a price and she needs money but is too greedy to do a real job and so sells the only thing of any value to someone else.......How is that a choice?

Dittany, I wasn't painting a fantasy, and I have no real views of prostitution because I've never had to really. But if a partner of mine used one I would be furious and it would be a deal breaker, of course. But it would be my partner I would have issue with, not the prostitute.
I was merely, as I say, playing devils advocate and wondering if, when puch came to shove, a mother would do anything (including having sex for money) to feed her child?

That's a really redundant theoretical question, there are no (and never will be) women in the UK who have no other earning choice than prostitution.

As for granny No name, if you are a 60 year old grandmother, then so am I - I am actually a woman though, which is more than can be said for you I suspect .

Only a woman hating punter would use the term "female" so condescendingly.

So transparent, it's really quite pathetic.

Beertricks...thankyou for the reply, that's all I was wondering.
smallwhitecat...lol, I wasn't suggesting lawyers were anything of the sort in case you thought I was! It's just one person, and I was just saying that prostitution doesn't = stupid.