am i overreacting?

[muffymk]

ok name changer here but i do not post very often..but hey ho

I have been with partner for 9 years we have 1 child and I have previous 3 from a marriage.

well my partner has a history of cheating once with a hooker, a woman he works with and a girl from the internet. well thought we sorted it out.

received letter today for him but i opened it as i had a 'feeling' anyway it was a letter from a bank confirming that he now has new bank account??

well i questioned him on why and he told me that he didnt want me monitoring on what he spends????

1. we have joint bank account and he pays bills and so do i.

2. he did have his own account but he wanted to change it to joint

3. monitoring??? when he said this my alarm bells rang

I told him to leave and he has ...to quietly as he never left when i found out about his cheating..which is a lot worse

am i paraniod?? i feel so sad that i wasted so much on this bloke

thats it

im missin the idea of him. we did have a very rocky relationship and when i think what he put me through i feel physically sick
i was no angel either and i did react very badly when he told me about the cheating.

he dumps me via text message....what sort of person does that

i have to concentrate on what is and not what ifs

but fucking hell its hard

You're right. He's a twat. You aren't.

Should you be asleep?

I honestly think there'd be something wrong with you if you didn't react very badly to his cheating! How would you react 'well'?? Just had an image of you going "Oh really, dear, that's nice. I'll make you a cuppa."

I've made myself giggle with that, so I'm going to bed. Hope you get some sleep, too :)

Life is short-trust your gut. No one dumps anyone after 9 years by text other than A COMPLETE USER! Out of there with your dignity intact. xxxx

he keeps tellin people that i forced it

that he is the victim.

i told him that i will get over this but he on the otherhand will have to wake up every morning knowing that he gave up on me and a wonderful little boy

i feel real sad

You know, other people are going to be able to see for themselves what a knob he is. Most nice people have a low opinion of blokes who dump their partner and DC and then whine about it.
BTW if this man sends you any more abusive texts you can point out to him that if he doesn't stop you will report him to the police for harassment. He is not entitled to torment you in any way he likes.

im goin thru the house tryin to get rid of everything little bits he left.

he took all his stuff but not one picture of our son-who is he???

Muffy

Don't be too hasty in getting rid of all the photos, he is - after all, your sons Dad.

There's no point in changing your number, deleting him etc - you still have to stay in contact with him because of your son.

Have fun changing the house around - getting rid of his crap - changing your hair, but also think of your son, you can't wipe him out entirely (sadly).

Don't worry what other people think - they will see him for who he is, in time. Only worry about yourself.

It is shit to think of the good times and who you thought he would be etc but try to look forward to good times with someone who will treat you properly.

There's nothing you were going to have with him, that you can't have (and better) with someone else.

muffy of couse he's going to try and blame you. Who else is he going to blame - himself?! Haha, the weasel is too weak to admit his own pathetic, manipulative behaviour. He's got to direct his guilt somewhere.

Just because it's pouring with rain and you got soaked, doesn't mean that you are raining. It rained on you.

thanks tummy and chippin in

sorry for the un mumsnet grammer

well i told the elder kids today

and they think in well shot. more cons than pros

in the mouths of babes eh?

but why do i still want him back

i just want to kick myself -thinkn with my fanny no doubt

Don't worry. There's someone far nicer out there to look after your fanny when the time is right. Not this lying twat you've had the good sense to give the boot.

Kids are the best aren't they! They'll lift you with their clear thinking and straight morals . You want him back because you don't yet realise how good life can be now, that you've dumped the dead weight you've been lumping around with you. Once you realise this, you can start to rebuild things the way you want them to be.

try reading this when you are forgetting the shit that he is having a bad day

thinking with your fanny ?

you can find some other bloke to pay some attention to that...they are ten a penny

fgs, stop sending olive branches to this fuckwit...you are sounding like a doormat

and you're not a doormat, are you ?

nope im not.

been lookin up Emotionally Unavailble Men and the Fallback girl -that is how is was

Im listening to Cher and Pink at the moment and now i think i love them

i am 'Strong Enough' and he was 'Just Like A Pill'

still havin a quiet sob but Disaronno helps

sob all you like, but stop with the doormat behaviour, ok ?

because asking this useless dickhead if he would like to try again is making a fair attempt at doormattery

I love DiSaronno...but you are going to have the hangover from Hell

hmm ok

i tell him not to contact me again

then i get texts askin me why etc

with no 'x'

then i get a 'just had dinner babe x' text

hmmm he is cheating isnt he?

Ignore ignore ignore

block him

why are reading his texts ?

why are you letting him inside your head ?

he might be cheating, I dunno

but he is certainly unsettling you, one way or the other

is that ok for him to do that ?

is it o for him to mindfuck you ?

should you be letting him ?

ok

Look, he wants you running around desperately trying to win him back, even though he doesn't want to come back. He just likes the idea of havinga warm bed and some home cooking waiting for him and he thinks that sooner or later you will agree to feed and service him and accept him having other sexual partners. DOn't do it. YOu are not so desperate and inadequate that you wlill scrabble after any crumbs he throws you, are you?

im soo mad i wanna rip his ribcage out and wear it as a hat!!!!

oh give over

the best revenge is cool indifference

embrace your anger on here...but give him the proverbial cold shoulder

'tis the way to go, I promise you

i have been ignoring him and indifference

amazing what indifference can do

now im suddenly desirable....fucking mumsnet cocklodger

ok, 2 hours of "ignoring"

you will have to try and keep it up for a bit longer than that...