Let me give you a few examples.
H, comes in this morning. Kids bedroom window lock is unlatched as I was out on roof terrace hanging out washing. I needed to go back out so left latch off. Before I could go out he rang me and asked me to pick him up, rushed off to do that and forgot that the window was left unlatched. He came back and went mad, as soon as he pointed it out to me I said "Ok hold my hands up, should have remembered that", he continued to bollock me, in effect telling me off. I didnt apologise again just allowed him to rant and swear at me, then got annoyed myself and started shouting back at him. He says he has to bollock me like this because I "am not sorry enough". He wants me to show how sorry I am and tell him what steps I will take to ensure this does not happen again.
This is an ongoing thing with us. There was a bucket of water in the kitchen with Flash in it ready to mop the floor. He did a big gasp when he saw it and with big exaggerated movements went and tipped it away, muttering under his breath and going on about how dd nearly stepped into it, she didn't she was no-where near it.
He says that because I didn't ensure the window was latched, our kids our in danger and anyone could look in and see them in there and I don't care about them because I don't look after them, he says he can't trust me safely with his kids.
This is exactly as it happened and it happens A LOT, usually about "health and Safety issues" for example if the bathroom floor gets wet when I am bathing kids I am expected to immediately mop it up with mop or bath towel or he goes off on one. He says I react like a stroppy teenager when he "has to bollock me" and he is probably right. I am so fucking sick of being bollocked by him, surely as a self governing adult it is up to me to decide exactly how sorry I am for minor infractions such as this and take the necessary steps to avoid it happening again. I feel that he wants to control my every reaction and thought. He is gone now but I still feel angry and shaky. Am I in the wrong here and just can't see it?