ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched No.7

[startingovernow]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether you are a new dumpling or a vet, feel free to join us in our quest for serenity. ...........

Sov, I had that with one sil & one bil & it really cut like a knife so I know the pain you must be going through. My xh didn't even speak to sil for yrs & had v little to do with bil while I had a great (or so I thought) relationship with them. What I didn't realise is that a lot of relationships with in-laws etc are conditional on you being with their relative . I was obviously naieve when I thought thinks would continue on as normal. Sending you big ((Hugs)). And yes I agree it is better for your dc's to have contact with their father.

AB, your looks had nothing to do with what your xp did. Look at cheryl cole ffs!!!! Some men just have wandering d**ks & it is nothing to do with other person! ((Hugs))

Chairmum, boots look fab

Mumfun, glad you had a nice time

Patience, hope you're feeling a bit better (())

Waves to Getting, Happy, Pink et al........

Lovely ladies, could I ask you to come on to this thread, if you can? I feel the OP could really use some of your wonderful advice and experience.

here

Thank you.

morning all !!! hello wwifn !!

feeling like i am coming out of my latest dip

practical stuff today: sort out some more p/work and start sorting through house for stuff i want to keep and throw away.

emotional - looking at a book from my mum "colour me beautiful" i have known the theory for a while but am going to put it into practice!!!

hope we are well.

If book is about colour therapy AB i am really interested so would be very interested myself if you can do my colours ,still in my dip and feeling blue but i know this too shall pass ,take care everyone thanks for eveyones support !

Morning dumplings !

AB I had my colours done a few years ago and it was brilliant! Interestingly it led me back to wearing colours that I wore as a teenager but hadnt for a long time. I very rarely wear stuff now that isnt in my spectrum although I was sooo relieved to discover black was good for me .Btw I volunteered as a model for people training to be consultants so it was really cheap , the company was House of Colour if there are any near you.

Patience sorry the last couple of days have been rough but as you say this too shall pass

Starting are you on another date later ?

Well I have just had my career thing and it was quite good although mostly admin and induction stuff. She gave me a time sheet where I am expected to devote 8 hours a week towards career/job hunting which I really like as it gives me some direction. Also I am booked onto a skills development day which sounds good. I need to just get firmly back into the mindset of working towards my future whatever that holds. Mid July I was really switched on but since then what with extreme emotional lethargy and anxiety and school holidays I have come to a stop.

Well I am still feeling full of fabulousity how long can it last . We passed exh in his stupid car on the way back from football last night and I didnt even flinch when dd said theres Dad and waved madly.

My date is friday night and I am trying to muster some excitement but its not happening. I dont think its helped by fact it was at least 7 weeks ago we met. You are right Starting it is nice he has waited that long and I do remember how he was a great listener and not the big I am. Perhaps because the night I met him I was just riding shotgun with a friend and so not looking for anyone has mislead me and actually I did like him iyswim ? I certainly didnt expect him to contact me because I dont tick a single box of what he wants ie the one. Anyway if its a shag hes after hes right out of luck

Waves to all

Just to say I just booked counselling through WA and i am going to my local centre
never done dv / abuse counselling b4 v xcited !!!

Whatever Oasis

Armbow, great that you're beginning to feel a bit better today . Clearing always v theraputic I think & colour stuff sounds great.

Getting, career stuff sounds fab but even better that you didn't react to xh's car . If nothing else at least you can use your date on fri night as an opportunity to get dressed up & hopefully have a bit of fun. Worst case, if it turns out to be a disaster you can always use it like a free counselling session if he's such a good listener . I'm off on 3rd date tonight

Patience, counselling sounds like a great idea & will hopefully help you with the greiving/healing. ((Hugs))

Waves to all.........

Was inspired by Dignified on another thread ,she said WA did counselling ,anyway phoned them up and they have lots to offer so will follow it up ,not for x2 weeks but up on the calender and its free and i dont need childcare that morning so its all good ,have a fab 3rd date ,pissing down here all day need to get a funky coat x

Raining down here too pretty much all day. That's fab about the counselling & always a bonus when you don't need to get childcare

Hi all, just popped in to say hi
LC has emailed to say that she is alive and kicking and will update soon

Will we see tonight's outfit starting?

ooohhh good luck starting

waves to lc if she is watching

What do you make of this thread? I'd be interested to know, as I'm now doubting my parenting skills and thinking if I invite another mum over for a play date she'll dislike how I manage my kids intensly and then slag me off to people when she leaves. Some of the things on there, I think "goodness I let me DC do that all the time"

Starting I want to know ALLLLLLL about your date

*my

I try and do all of that Tea emphasis on try,my kids often only have water or milk in the house and fizzy juice etc is just a treat.Im not saying they do all of the above without guidance but they are reminded of acceptable behaviour every time they cross a line ,at nursery they would be expected to do all these things.My sister says im clinical,i say i am consistent ,i have always worked with animals and good diet plenty of exercise ,consistant boundaries all help with training young animals so i dont /cant{ lol....completely indoctrinated after 20yr career}see the difference.

Oh and found out no babysitting re 25th just found out so bit pissed as i had tickets chosen and everything ,maybe next time x

tea - haven't read the whole thread but the things listed are things that I would prefer DS not to do, but he's 2 and we're all learning at the moment :)

And FGS - how do you ban tantrums? Are these people's children normal?

hi

awwww patience i am disappointed x
was your h meant to have them?

tea - whilst i believe rules are necessary some of the posts made me a bit kids should be allowed to kids ...

I'm closing that thread now! I might have low expectations of DS but if that's what it takes to get through the day, that's what we'll do!

Patience - so sorry you can't make it :( - but so glad you're getting some counselling!

sorry ...to be kids

hey everybody

Took a look at that thread tea and i think the OP has unreasonable expectations depending on age tbh, my kids do a lot of the stuff she mentions but thats because they are learning, all children need to be taught everything she has listed, everyone who knows me say i'm a great parent and they and their children LOVE to come to my house as im so relaxed and that they would rather be here than anywhere else, dont think my DC would like to go to her house though lol am sure you are a wonderful parent and if you weren't then people wouldnt allow their children around you at all imo

Whats this colour therapy about then? sounds interesting
Glad your feeling better AB and glad your career thing seemed to go ok GETTING, hope the counselling goes well for you PATIENCE and your out of your dip soon ((hugs)) and i too need to get a coat for the winter have had same one for 5yrs, think it's time for a change :)

had crap again today with XP, ended up asking him to leave but im not down about it, more angry than anything
He turns up very late for visit, so because im angry i refuse to speak to him, when he asked why i said because i didnt trust myself in what i would say, i sat reading while cooking dinner after 20 mins i went for a cig so he came and asked why i was pissed off so i told him that it was because he was v late and just to go and see DC, came back in and he was clearly angry because i refused to talk to him so when DC started arguing at the table he shouted at them and tried to put youngest DS in the booster seat (which he no longer likes) so asked him not to and he started shouting at me, so without shouting i got up and said right daddys going now say bye, told him when the next visit is and when he called me a bitch i said ive asked you not to shout at me in my home now please say bye to the children, with that he stormed out got in his car and screeched off AGAIN

Cant wait for the space, really need it but got to suffer another 2 weeks yet, it makes me really angry that he got annoyed because i wouldnt speak to him, he's not here to see me!! also annoys me that he can be late and then wonder why im pissed about it, i give up i honestly do

Waves to everyone and hope you all had a great day.....and yes will be checking in regulary for update starting

No didnt even go there with X AB ROFL!

sov - i am a soft summer according to this site

www.prettyyourworld.com/power-of-color.html

Hi all

Sorry you had more cr** with XH Sov, will be good when you get more space.

Really sad you can't make meet up Patience, can you come Sov?

I am a Spring btw

Patience thats such a shame [disappointed emoticon]

Sov sorry you're still getting grief your XP sounds like a twunt

AB that site looks good I am a clear winter btw

Tea I have always been known for being quite strict and probably have gone for most of the first post rules but it doesnt say what age all this was expected of the kids. Saying that I wasnt raising them on my own at that age and dealing with all this crap may well have been a different story .

Wonder what Startings up to ..