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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Old Bags No More - The Brave Babes & the Battle with the Booze

982 replies

MoominMags · 15/07/2010 09:26

Well, here we go ladies (and MIFLAW)! The new thread to follow on from JWN's 'me and alcohol have ruined my family'. I hope no one minds that I decided to go with 'brave'? I just think that it describes us!

As a quick recap, I am 33 and on day 22 of sobriety (on this occasion!)

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Gloupgloup · 30/07/2010 10:25

I have been drinking now for 2 solids years, I put on 2 stones. Its like I completely gave up on myself.

franklampoon · 30/07/2010 10:26

you are all amazing

TrinityRhino · 30/07/2010 10:26

thanks miflaw

can I ask what your name means
last night in my drunken stupor whilst I was passing out falling asleep I was thinking of you and trying to work out your name

MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:29

Yay Trinity!

Glad everything went well with SW. Well done for getting it all together. Well done for getting rid of the booze.

Don't worry about 'never' drinking again. Just focus on one day at a time. ('Never' always scared the crap out of me!)

Yes, you are worth more than how you feel now. You can get there one day at a time.

gloup - don't worry about the weight, the important thing for now is the booze. (I have lost lots of weight since stopping but I see it as a very happy side effect of stopping poisoning myself.)

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algee · 30/07/2010 10:29

Flipping heck Tucker...i've only been gone a couple of hours. Morning to all I've not 'spoken' to today. Happy sober day!

MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:30

Thanks frank!

trinity - MIFLAW stands for 'Man I Feel Like a Woman.' Can't remember why he used that originally but I am sure he will be along shortly to remind us all!

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MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:31

Hi algee! How's the move progressing??

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TrinityRhino · 30/07/2010 10:31

oh thankyou
its been bugging me

venusandmars · 30/07/2010 10:32

Trinity well done for getting your act together this morning. That really was the most important thing.

TrinityRhino · 30/07/2010 10:33

thankyou

algee · 30/07/2010 10:35

...working on my 'calculations' to PROVE that the move in to storage with delivery of stuff in a couple of months is the most economical way forward. Think I might be having to employ some imaginative mathematics!

How are you this morning moomin? Envious of weight loss stories, I'm still craving sweet...always been a savoury girl...so eating my body weight in crappy sugar stuff and drinking soft drinks. Reasonably content to let it go and hope the cravings eventually subside.

MIFLAW..felt the same about the dream not being sold last night...

Sorry not ignoring posts just need to make the best of my last day alone!

MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:38

algee - You are me!! I always described myself as a 'savoury girl' ! I have now come to terms with the fact that I always had a sweet tooth that was satisfied by the sugar in booze so now I love chocolate and cakes, ha ha!

Good luck with the calculations.

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Mouseface · 30/07/2010 10:42

Trinity

WELL DONE for getting through the visit!

MoominMags

I lay in bed the other night wondering what MIFLAW meant too - 'my flaw' was drinking or 'Maybe I'll Feel Like A Whiskey'

Nice to know what it means.

MIFLAW · 30/07/2010 10:43

Because I'm a man on a "women's" site.

Christ I'm dull and predictable without a drink.

But at least I am no longer "the wrong kind of exciting".

I used to see a guy at meetings (I assume he still goes, it's me that's left the area) who said that his ambition in life was to be the most boring man he knew, because of what he used to be like when life was "exciting" - he had been sober then for several years and said that people still cross the street to avoid him in his home town!

Cat - I don't mean to attack you, but when people say, "I can't do this," it is usually because they have not thoroughly considered the alternative - getting drunk every single day until you die and waking up the following morning feeling like shit.

During my first year in recovery I had lots of slips. Each time there was a different reason. Looking back, I now realise that it was the same reason every time - I was not taking it seriously enough. A part of me believed that somehow, by some miracle, it would sort itself out and just "get better" of its own accord. It was when I realised that this was not the case and that, if anything, it was going to get worse and worse and worse, that my current unbroken period of sobriety began.

All of you can do this - and, as I said to Trinity, I know this, because I did.

You are all miracles - every day you go without a drink is a day of laughing in the face of destiny. Your illness wants you dead and every day you don't drink you are saying "no". Keep saying "no" and keep living (not just existing, and certainly not dying.)

jesuswhatnext · 30/07/2010 10:43

TRINITY - WELL DONE, YOU ARE A MEGASTAR!!!

gloup - i feel that i kind of lost myself in a fog, that is clearing now on a daily basis and its lovley - i seem to have found a miricle, its like i found a clock that ticks slower, everyday seems to be longer, i have 'time' for so much more - the sober me is not a bad person for me to spend time with
i quite like me again!

MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:44

Hi mouse,

I thought it was something to do with a 'flaw' (drinking!) at first too, ha ha!

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MoominMags · 30/07/2010 10:46

"You are all miracles - every day you go without a drink is a day of laughing in the face of destiny. Your illness wants you dead and every day you don't drink you are saying "no". Keep saying "no" and keep living (not just existing, and certainly not dying.)"

I loved that MIFLAW, thank you.

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venusandmars · 30/07/2010 10:46

Algee, I too am envious of the weight loss that others describe. I've lost a couple of pounds, but I am feeling so, so much better. I think I am leaner and I don't feel so puffy.

I've been doing some calculations too. Working out how much I would have spent on booze in a year. I am trying to justing buying a campervan, but even I didn't drink that much (or didn't drink wine that was expensive enough!).

TrinityRhino · 30/07/2010 10:47

I have an illness moment of clarity!!!

shit

I cant drink without getting fucked off my face

TrinityRhino · 30/07/2010 10:53

could have been 100 pounds a week for me

venusandmars · 30/07/2010 10:58

It's bloody scary isn't it?

I have noticed that my money goes a long way these days. I don't go to the cashline nearly as often.

Oh and I nearly always paid in cash in case some 'big brother' of the credit card wa secretly adding up how much I spent on booze

MIFLAW · 30/07/2010 10:58

"I cant drink without getting fucked off my face"

Hopefully, when the fifth edition of the Big Book comes out, they will use this as a subtitle because it sums up the key message beautifully ...

algee · 30/07/2010 11:27

Yeah, started the booze calculation the other day too, but took fright. Venus...cheap wine? I'd started buying 'value' vodka...classy me!

MoominMags · 30/07/2010 11:28

Loving the 5th edition's subtitle!

And venus, yes to what you were saying about paying in cash so as not to leave a trail! God, what madness! (I did however continue to use my nectar card and as a result I get lots of marketing stuff about wine! Big Brother is watching... but only to make more cash out of you!)

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MoominMags · 30/07/2010 11:29

algee - I remember the days when I would only drink branded vodka!! Soon slipped to the cheapest stuff I could find, yuck!

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