Archers thread #188: New Order, please! Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd love to spend time with Martyn Gibson, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

In some haste as we are going out for the day. I was asked weeks ago to put I've Killed the Vicar in as the new title but I agree with more recent comments that Peggy's funeral feels like old news now. Great line, though. Sorry not to have used Markie Malarkey, though. I've settled on something that will only make sense to people who were also youngish in the late 1970s or early 1980s. Here's a clue. If a certain person appears in tomorrow's episode the title will be relevant.

Over to you!

or it’s a drone with a jackhammer attached to dig them out

I've missed chunks of the past few weeks, but I still can't get my head around the Grundys having a a hitherto never-mentioned woman round for tea, giving her one of George's T shirts(?) and now happily letting her live with them. (Wasn't George living with Will, BTW?).

It's all so odd, that I quite expect to hear that there was polar bear on the loose during nets, swiftly dispatched by gun-totting David.

Thanks for the (not really that new, now) thread.

@Godesstobe you should write pretty much exactly that to radio 4! Think it sums up really well how we're all feeling.

How big is EdnEm’s caravan?

Three rooms: Ed'n'Em, Keira, George (now Amber).

As big as the SWs want it to be.

I thought George had moved in with Will?

Hay all checking in!! Struggling to keep up with the chat so just dipping in and out

Amber WOW what an odd one...

I don't even know what the farms in TA produce anymore.

Do David & Ruth still have sheep? Who does the shearing? Do they still have a gang of shearers going to the farm? Does Home Farm still grow strawberries? Who does the picking these days? Does Home Farm still produce Venison? Are the fishing lake & riding course still at Home Farm? Who looks after them and collects the fees? Has Josh still got his egg business? Does the AI man still visit? Does the milk tanker still get stuck in the lane after heavy rain? Do the cows ever get out and run through the village (this was an annual event when I lived near a dairy farm) Is there a gamekeeper or do the pheasants for the shoot rear themselves? Where does he live? Is he married - why couldn't his wife be the organised cook (because she's used to doing lunches for the shoot) who saves the cricket teas, rather than Joy who has to be involved in everything? Has any character borrowed the small bailer lately? Is there still a Farmer's market in Borchester? Do any of the TA farms have a stall there? Does Ian take the pizza van to the Farmer's Market? Does he come back with any gossip? Who makes the wine at Lower Loxley?

Most of the characters in TA these days exist in a vacuum. Not a mention of their jobs or the countryside. It never determines how they spend their time or how they relate to one another. In fact the farming characters are becoming more and more peripheral to the storylines. It might as well be set in an office in central Birmingham.

He has. This week's scriptwriter knew that last week, when she portrayed Amber going with Brad to Will's house on 1st July to get a tee-shirt from George's room there.

She wants to live with Emma I would imagine

not that any of it is remotely credible

Great summary @MissMarplesNiece. Lots of ideas for the SWs there. It would be nice if they were listening and focussed a bit more on gentle story lines, character development and rural life!

Yep - there’s so much they can cover and keep the slow burns going - Helen and Dane for eg

speaking of Helen - why have there been no issues with the house share?

I don’t like it when they let something go quiet and then come back all at once. I imagine they will come back in a month with a massive row that’s been brewing silently and we’ll just be presented with that

@MissMarplesNiece , Brookfield only has one cow now, High Heels. They make all their money from the event barn.

Bridge Farm produces yoghurt, cheese and organic veg.

Grange Farm has Texel sheep.

Home Farm is now just arable, and all the farming is done by Stella.

All the other farms are rewilded.

Is there a gamekeeper or do the pheasants for the shoot rear themselves? Where does he live? Is he married - why couldn't his wife be the organised cook (because she's used to doing lunches for the shoot)

His wife, if either of them exist, probably has her own full-time job, and has neither the time nor inclination to do lunches for shoots.

I believe her - she told them, they didn't express their excitement enough, and she sulked because they weren't giving her exactly what she wanted like they have done every other time.

I think she was spotty, bespectacled and in Brad's year. He'll remember her nickname soon!

I feel like martyn and annabel are characters that we should only hear with a regular character - not together on their own. Although the scene with jazzer wasn’t much better. Yawny yawn

Grange farm has grown has it? Like that clarrie wasn’t taking too much nonsense but she’s too nice for her own good so I hope she doesn’t let her walk all over her. And like clarrie standing up for Neil

Grange Farm had six bedrooms when Oliver bought it, and at the moment two of them are occupied; by Clarrie and Eddie, and by Oliver.

Ed and Emma and Keira moved out into a mobile home and have not moved back, Will and Poppy moved out to 1, The Green, and Mia has never lived there. George has made a spirited attempt to have rooms at Grange Farm, at Little Grange and at 1, The Green, and at the moment is not living in any of them.

The 'closed book' board member Ira who's receptive to Justin's ideas and whose daughter is getting married - does the name indicate TA's first Jewish character?!

Also was that a new silent in the pub yesterday? Drew Clunes the local novelist? 'He's not loud' 😁

I don't really want new characters though, even if they're silent. I'd rather have the mishaps of the Button sisters and Terry Two Phones.

(Yes I'm ignoring Amber - though if it means the Grundy women grow a spine and stop being skivvies to men, I'm all for it)

I quite like tough Clarrie.

I don't believe Amber has any parents. I suspect her of being a prototype of some new and horrific walking, talking AI-bot. She is the obvious successor to HAL in 2001, A Space Odyssey.

This is ridiculous. I could say more but I'm drained.

Amber is unbearable.

Keira has a room there too. Keira was there when Amber arrived.

It's the Ambridge Bedroom Warp, innit?

To me, she sounds like a prototypical anime squealing female: supposedly an adult, but looks and acts like a prepubescent teen, complete with "SQUEEE!!" Is she meant to come across as oblivious, or as a real mean girl? Because she's either thick as toast, or deliberately cruel, or both.