Archers thread #165: Bridge over troubled waters! Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

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This thread may well fill up as fast as the last one, so let's just get stuck in!

His baby but not his pregnancy.

I really feel for Fallon. She told Harrison she wanted to keep the pregnancy and miscarriage quiet and he screamed it across the village. Have we heard him acknowledge that or apologise for it? He’s making her feel terrible for not being sad, and it seems he would have tried to persuade her to continue with the pregnancy. Him saying she hadn’t thought about how he felt is so self-centered. He’s not considering her or giving her the chance to say how she feels at any point. I’m not surprised she’s gone to The Bull as it’s the only place she can really say how she’s feeling. I also think it’s the end of the road for them.

Couldn't agree more! It is a fact of life that when it comes to reproduction the female half of the human race does most of the work. The male part is over and done with in a fraction of a second, although many fathers obviously do suppor the mother through the pregnancy and birth and then take an active part in fatherhood once the baby arrives. No woman should ever be forced to go through pregnancy and birth if she doesn't want to. No man has a right to become a father at any cost to the woman who bears his child. Harrison doesn't seem to have grasped any of this. If they do split up, one would hope that before embarking on another long-term relationship he reflects on this and makes sure his next partner is genuinely keen to have a child with him.

Also, Harrison is totally fixated on the pregnancy and miscarriage. Whereas Fallon’s trauma is the fact she thought she was going to drown. I don’t recall her being able to talk about that on air with Harrison, only with Jolene last night. He’s being unsupportive in so many ways.

No he is not right. It isn't his pregnancy. He's being utterly vile and self centered. Fallon almost drowned and all he cares about is the loss of a cluster of cells. Fallon should be uppermost in his thoughts - not a foetus.

And why the hell has no one pointed out the accident probably wasn't the cause of the miscarriage?

This.

Fallon nearly died in a traumatic accident. The baby/miscarriage is a bit player in her emotional turmoil. Harrison should be thankful about his alive wife. I guess he sees this as his 'one chance'. I don't think they can come out of this as a couple. Harrison now realises how much he wants to be a father and I suspect this will be more powerful than his love for Fallon.

Yep, this 100%. He wasn’t even at the scan to support her - it was because as he said ‘it was our pregnancy’. He didn’t even seem that happy there were no complications (I suppose he had hoped that a ‘complication’ might include a heartbeat suddenly appearing).

She mentioned feeling afraid of him. Specifically afraid he was going to hit Alice, but once he starts to show a capacity to assault a woman, who knows where it's going to go.

some compassionless posts here about Harrison.

I have no issue with him grieving his future as a father but a lot of posts on here seem to be sainting him for being the one in the marriage who wanted the baby

Yes @ANutAsBigAsABoulder @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g I totally agree re sympathy for Fallon and Harrison being utterly self-obsessed. A couple of nice scenes with the Pirate and Fallon last night I thought.

”makes sure his next partner is genuinely keen to have a child with him”

Wasn’t it said in another post that Fallon had said she would want children later. If so it must be difficult for him as presumably in too deep by the time she changed her mind.

Fallon obviously understands they need to talk as she said so, and, for her own sake as much as anyone else’s, she needs to tell him to be silent whilst she tells him the situation from her point of view.

It seems she understands how he feels and does not want to hurt him, but not saying is making it worse for everyone. I think she loves him as much as he in his own currently self obsessed way loves her. I think given their obvious differences on something that is so important to each of them she can see where this is leading and possibly does not want to push the destruct button.

it is really sad for them both and of course if she had just been straight with him upfront (or the doctor had told her in private) then there would be no story and nothing for us to get so heated about, and would have lessened the drama of the (assumed) consequences of the crash

I feel enormously sorry for Fallon and what she is going through, but I also think Harrison's feelings are valid. My guess is they will come through this as a couple eventually. How else are they going to run The Bull? I can see Alan doing some counselling - though I hope not as I find him very dreary.

He's not inspiring compassion.

Fallon had an early miscarriage- poor Harrison!

Fallon nearly drowned and had an early miscarriage and witnessed her husband directing a violent meltdown at her friend - poor Harrison.

nah

I’ve never heard Fallon be anything but clear about not wanting kids but didn’t listen fr a couple of years

Did he really say "That was our pregnancy.?"

He's right. It was as much his as hers.

Fallon was pregnant. Harrison was not.

An unborn child being "his" just means he is the father. He doesn't own it!

I can’t say I remember her saying anything about changing her mind in the future. She was quite clear that she didn’t want children, wasn’t she?!

That doctor should be given a sternly worded reprimand, and is the main person to blame for this; without their entirely unprofessional and unethical behavior the chances are Harrison would have concentrated his energy on taking care of Fallon as she recovered from the accident, and she'd have had a chance to work out how she was feeling in her own time.

I can't remember whether we heard any on air discussion between H and F before they married or in the first months of the marriage about whether they wanted to have children, and if so, when. Then IIRC Harrison's brother and partner had a baby and H & F volunteered to look after the child for a weekend. That led Harrison to feel very strongly that he wanted to have a family, but it had the opposite effect on Fallon. She liked the child but realised that life as a parent had no great appeal for her. So they talked about it at some length and Harrison told F that it was OK, what he wanted more than anything was to be married to her, and if that meant not having children, that was fine. I'm sure he genuinely believed that, at the time. Unfortunately, however, this very brief accidental pregnancy and miscarriage has shown H that he really does want to have children and it's shown F that too beyond any shadow of a doubt. I think it's a dealbreaker, personally.

I am not sure that is true, in fact you could equally say a lot of posts are demonising him for being overjoyed at the thought of a potential baby and devastated at the loss, possibly made more profound by the fact that it was his only opportunity. He is mourning his baby, his child, not a few cells.

The way he is dealing with that and not wanting to hear anything to the contrary from Fallon and riding roughshod over her feelings is a different matter.

Her mum was lovely with her. Fallon was exceptionally kind to Alice.

I assumed that meant “he had to leave town in a hurry so there wasn’t time to resolve and forgive Alice’s hurtful comment about no-one wanting him in the family”.

You may see it as a “cluster of cells”. A lot of people, presumably including Harrison, see it as a baby.

And why the hell has no one pointed out the accident probably wasn't the cause of the miscarriage? Lack of research by SW team? There was an excellent opportunity yesterday or the day before when I think Fallon was commenting on likelihoods of miscarriage.

Harrison nearly lost his wife because - as he understands - Fallons best friend was drunk driving.

Harrison had a few hours of thinking he might be a dad, which has unlocked all the feelings he had suppressed because he loves Fallon.

He is a human being and is hurting and he needs someone to talk to about all of this.

This.

And considering Fallon's decision against having children, shouldn't she have had her tubes tied, or whatever they do the days?