Archers thread #162: ‘This is like talking to Lassie’ – how right you are, Fallon! Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think cowhide-covered walls are a great idea for a cafe with vegan and vegetarian customers, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Title comes from one of the better scripted conversations of recent weeks, when Fallon said ”Harrison, this is like talking to Lassie! Just TELL ME”. So true of so many conversations on TA where you just want to shake them and yell 'Just TELL US, and quickly, so you don't get interrupted before you can say the important bit', but of course they rarely do and days pass before the conversation resumes. @TheBell suggested putting it in the title, so thanks for that.

@OverArmour had a great if more obscure idea, paying tribute to a Peter Greenaway film: The Policeman, The Drunk, The Vet and his Lover. That will do very well as a starting point for the new thread. Will Alistair leave? Will Denise tell John she's leaving him? Will Paul learn to be less noisy? Do any of us care?

I do care a little about Harrison and Fallon. I want Harrison to get a grip and realise he needs a paying job more than the captaincy of the cricket team. I don't care at all about Harry but I think he's been brought in purely as a plot device so with any luck we can all forget about him very soon.

Over to you!

Thanks for the new thread. Checking in so I can keep up to date as I can’t be bothered to actually listen at the moment

Thanks for the new thread. I’ve been listening but haven’t got a lot to say.

I miss Helen.

There’s something I never thought I’d say.

Thanks for the new thread @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g
and many thanks for the mention… far more exciting than listening these days. I nearly never miss an episode tho 😂.

Denise and Ali Stare is just awful. Ugh.

We haven't blended their names to make it like Frilly and Trolly. Denial? Denistare?

Do we still have the intern who sits in on SW meetings? Maybe they could advise them to ditch the Denise/Alistair storyline for something more interesting ..like..I don’t know..dry rot?

Maybe the Montbeliardes could get footrot.

no no no! Not fair to innocent cows!

Paul’s reaction was pretty much spot on I thought - especially since he doesn’t know about Alistair and his mum. His ‘What are you not telling me?’ Was absolutely right. And he is correct - Alistair should not leave. If Jacob finds Paul so irritating they should have got rid of him when Denise came back. The whole storyline is ridiculously unbelievable.

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime , but the Deni-stare story is not fair to innocent listeners.

Maybe the cows could start mewing.

Will Chris be the person who finally mentions the ‘S’ word? (Social services or Safeguarding… take your pick) it’s blown my mind that no one Alice has confided in has mentioned the huge red flag this all is for Martha’s safety.

I’m a bit behind but don’t want to lose the thread. Can’t wait to catch up and find out whether Alistair and Denise have been doing any more gross snogging in the cupboard 🙄

Being honest I’ve behaved like that at work but 1) I was 25 not 55 and 2) we weren’t having an affair and of course 3) the guy’s son wasn’t also working with us! Really sickening behaviour all round from those two.

Not the most discreet policeman is he?

Has he been telling more people!

Alice got rid of Harry as soon as she discovered he drank, so no safeguarding issue there IMO

Why would social services be concerned? Alice isn't drinking and Harry hasn't drunk around Martha. They don't get involved pre-emptively.

My thinking is that there’s already been social services involvement so Harry - his arrest etc- would trigger an operation encompass type situation ?

Because it isn’t? Hardly even a shell-pink flag. And as nothing compared to the risk the wretched brat was at from her mother caning it like she did through half her pregnancy.
Mummy went out a few times with a bloke who got arrested for D&D. World’s tiniest alarm jangles. Once.

I haven’t listened for a few weeks- who are Denise and Paul? I thought I had the wrong progbthe other day as I didn’t recognise anyone!

@Meadowbird , they are both veterinary nurses at the practice. They are mother and son. Denise is married to Paul's father, John. Ali-stare and Denise are In Lurve but not yet having an affair, just the odd snog in the Medicine Cupboard. Paul and John don't know yet.

There's a George (Grundy) but no Ringo. Sorry, couldn't resist

Not in the least!
Harry isn't martha's dad, how would they connect them? We only act on police reports that they send when there are confirmed children connected to the perpetrator. Why would police connect Harry and Martha?

I assume if Alice gets back with Harry the Chris may mention involving social services

So just listened.

i like Denial or Denistare. So annoying hearing them. They could really cut this SL short. It’s boring and ick. Too much time has been apportioned to this.

has Alice never thrown a tea party before?where was Martha during sandwich making? Chris is very sweet - she totally f’ed that up. He uses her name an awful lot when they’re talking. Did he realise they were the only 2 people in the room.

you know blackadder - with Victoria and Albert - where Albert can’t keep a secret so keeps telling her what her xmas present is - well reminds me of Harrison

poor champion

There's a Mungo, though.