Archers thread #148: Unseasonably, it's panto time in Ambridge. He's behind you, Pat! BANG. Discuss the Archers here.

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Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think George Grundy isn't a psychopath, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Will Rob return, or are they playing with us? Will Pat run amok with her shotgun and wipe out half the village? (We can but hope ...) Will Oliver come to his senses and turf the Grundy clan out of Grange Farm? So many questions, so much time.

Over to you!

I won't be watching the Coronation and certainly won't be swearing any oaths, but I would say that if anyone stands a good chance of living a long life, it's Charles: he's already pretty old, his parents lived to be very old (as did his maternal grandmother, I don't know about any of his other grandparents except that I would guess his maternal grandfather probably died quite young, though I don't know what of), and he has access to the best healthcare.

I was listening to a programme the other day which was quite insistent on him being descended from Vlad the Impaler. If the old trope about Vlad being the inspiration for Dracula were true, then maybe he really is immortal.

On the other hand, maybe it's just talking about the immortality of the soul. In that sense, May the King live forever is just like God save the King. Nothing controversial there, from the POV of a Christian monarch. Even I'd pray that for him, and I don't much care either way whether he lives or dies in a terrestrial sense.

I haven't listened to today's episode yet, but as I was listening to yesterday's I thought:

a) what's with all the bunting chat, are they messing with us?
b) why is Kenton wobbling round on a ladder; is David about to appear and knock him off kilter to his doom?
c) all the chat about people milling about Bridge Farm if they 'win' the illuminations - they're definitely going to win and Rob is going to pop up in the dark and commit dastardly deeds, isn't he?

I reckon the bunting chat is just the scriptwriters messing with us after the high profile disappearance of Fallon's bunting...

The wobbly ladder and the 'it's not very secure' were a little odd, but were they trying to be 'real' about the fact that Kenton probably wouldn't have done a risk assessment?! Or are we going to have a bunting collapse while Kenton and Jolene fight over their lost/won illuminations... 😁

Me too, just hope DH is out playing golf.

I know it’s not the way of this thread to actually like anything but I also quite enjoy Eurovision and will be watching that too.

I’ve been there! Are you doing the gastronomic Golden Circle tour. It’s amazing until you reach the dried fish.

No gastronomy, as I don't eat fish or seafood. Had a great time, though.

Do not suggest to Helen that they should be making cheese with dried fish or anything...

I love Eurovision, love pomp & circumstance, love The Archers too!
I'll get my coat

I actually quite like the Archers, shh don’t tell anyone.

That is the utter joy of this thread - if you weren’t on here who would you tell (and how would you even begin to explain!)

‘May the King live forever’ is a line (from the Bible) in Handel’s coronation anthem ‘Zadok the Priest’, which will be sung - as it has been at every coronation since 1727. So I expect that’s why. However, it won’t be shouted out chez Ambridge as we won’t be watching the Coronation, having other things to do.

Also very much not on the must-watch list: Eurovision. The current obsession with it is making TA v v painful to listen to just now.

Jolene, when she isn’t being a pirate, always strikes me as sounding like that pneumatic Cadbury’s Caramel bunny (I know it’s Miriam Margolyes really, but Jolene in sexeeeee mode is uncomfortably like that).

Does anyone else find that currently listening to scenes with Helen and Lee being happy and relaxed is like waiting for the other shoe to drop? I'm always convinced that at any moment Rob will come leaping out at them twirling his moustaches and demanding MySon with menaces.

His maternal grandfather was King George VI who died from a coronary thrombosis at 56. His health was very poor, greatly exacerbated by heavy smoking and no doubt by the stress of his brother's abdication and the War.

Paternal grandparents: his grandfather died at 62 from arteriosclerosis (wartime stress also probably a factor). His grandmother died at 84, don't know the cause (Wikipedia has let me down).

Not especially long-lived. My own grandparents, from very humble backgrounds, all made it to three score years and ten. One managed three months short of her hundredth birthday.

yes!

And now it looks as if we'll have to go through the whole debacle again too ...

*His maternal grandfather was King George VI who died from a coronary thrombosis at 56. His health was very poor, greatly exacerbated by heavy smoking and no doubt by the stress of his brother's abdication and the War.

Paternal grandparents: his grandfather died at 62 from arteriosclerosis (wartime stress also probably a factor). His grandmother died at 84, don't know the cause (Wikipedia has let me down).

Not especially long-lived.*

Maternal grandmother made it to over 100 didn’t she?

Yes, one out of four was very long-lived in pretty good health till near the end. She'd have fitted in well in Ambridge!

Your grandparents did well then! Both Charles's parents lived well into their 90s, wasn't Philip nearly 100? The cohort life expectancy for 1920 was 61 for men, so he outlived that by over 30 years. I don't know the Queen's year of birth or what the cohort life expectancy was (I only know 1920 because of a grandparent), but I'd be willing to bet she went a good 20 years over her cohort expectancy.

The Queen was born in 1926 (like David Attenborough). (I've really outed myself as a Royal enthusiast on this thread! A lot of it has come from watching the first few series of The Crown, tbh.)

I do hope someone is going to explain to Helen that she'll be entitled to a screen in court, or possibly even to give evidence via video link - not sure if the latter's used except for children though?

I don't care for King Charles or any of the pomp coming at us this weekend.
I love Eurovision!
I love the Archers, (isn't being annoyed by most of the characters most of the time part of the joy of it?!)
Surely the Bridge Farm Illuminations thing is all building up to Rob showing up this weekend? Otherwise it's such a silly storyline?!

It is a ridiculous storyline.

Wasn't sure of significance of H's telling Kirsty that she couldn't stand up in public atm- just a lead in to her fessing up about how awful she's feeling, or wider import?

Zadok the Priest is a marvellous bit of music. I'm looking forward very much to hearing it on Saturday. Refers to the coronation of King Solomon, I see.

I hope Tracy's wedding dress really is lovely. I don't want anything to spoil her special day. We don't know when it is yet, do we?

I thought the conversation about the dress last night was odd, unless I missed a previous discussion on it. Surely before offering to lend a dress, the first things you'd want to know would be a) does the bride want a traditional wedding dress? and, if not, b) does she want a white dress of some other sort? As far as I know, Jolene went straight into offering her a second-hand dress to borrow without establishing those, and without even specifying what colour or style the offered dress was. I gathered from the conversation, perhaps leaping to conclusions, that it wasn't white. But I could be wrong. I'm mainly basing that on the fact that it definitely wasn't something which had been initially intended to be a wedding dress.

I didn't listen through Lent so I might have missed out on the background to the dress conversation, but it did seem like it came out of nowhere.

No, you've not missed anything.

I heard it that as Tracy was talking sbout even second hand decent dresses are £££, Jolene had a posh dress which might be suitable, and if it's not, it can be altered or give ideas, and Jolene wouldn't be offended whichever way.

But Tracy did say to Jolene “I’m not sure I want a big white dress, anyway.” Surely that covers ‘not traditional wedding dress’ and ‘not a white dress’?

I wish there was a thread though - “My much wealthier and more flamboyant boss is gifting me a vintage dress of hers for my wedding. I’ve never worn anything so extravagant and I’m worried I won’t do it justice.” And then lots of requests for a photo and confirmation of which designer it’s by. What / who would Jolene wear and how much would it have cost??

Many years ago on Mustardland when I suggested that Triumph were really missing a targetted marketing opportunity by not doing a glamorous bra called a Jolene (remember Ms Rogers name was Doreen before showbiz beckoned) Eliza suggested it would have to be denim-look with rivets.

What do C&W singers wear - low-cut flouncy Western saloon bad girl dresses or sprayed-on leather?