The Archers. No need to share the thread with anyone else darling, we can have a lovely time just us together. It must be Henry's bedtime.

[PseudoBadger]

New thread for the Omnibus.

How on earth can a maternity top be tarty?

Other people's scans are never interesting Small. There was a thread on here at Christmas about someone who wanted her whole family to go & was surprised when they had better things to do.

Nice Kim Kardashian comment, Rob, now put those claws away.

Did he really say that?

I quite like Josh! Well done him!

God what an utter git he is.

Loved Josh though...he's got the measure of those two city wide-boys. Is that actor another Troughton?

That was her last chance, too, since now she and rob are working together and having days off together...

Gobsmacked at Tarty. It's a maternity top ffs!

Is this shared shifts idea the maddest thing ever - or respectable business practice? Surely the SWs wouldn't just make up anything so absurd?

I had some quite raunchy maternity tops I looked like humpty dumpty with cleavage

Hopefuply Kirsty's thoughts will get her thinking.

But I thought they were bound to notice something at the scan, after last time.....unless she lied.

I can't believe nothing happened with the mw. Helen is noticeable not eating, gaunt and thin

How is it going to be a job share if they work the same shifts? And how is the shop going to to be covered? Surely nobody's going to agree to that?

I'm afraid I lolled at Kim Kardashian.

Did anyone outside Helrob agree to the shared shift

The sw don't seem to understand what a jobshare is

I actually think I need to stop listening until it's stopped now. I loved the archers because it was escapism from my life. Now it's just so bleak, I'm equally depressed by it as I am my piles of marking and tantruming toddler.

Twitter seems to think she didn't go to the scan at all ...

Rob will work for free if it means he can keep an eye on Helen. Or he'll make it too unbearable for her to be there so she leaves him to do all the shifts

That thought about her not going crossed my mind. She probably remembers that last time round the scan picked up that the baby was small when she wasn't eating properly.

She's uninterested in the baby enough to not go.

Real life grimness I can't handle, real people killing each other for dubious reasons... Run a mile from that news.
TA is tough but I'm ok with it because it's fiction. And really well done (mostly).

It's not all bleak.

The first exchange between Lynda and Susan yesterday was absolutely golden

Lynda: do you mind if I attend your curtain committee meeting.
Susan: oh. You've heard about the tie backs then?

It made me BOOP my head off.

The helenrob storyline is bleak. It has to be to do the subject matter justice. But there's plenty more going on, as always.

If she had had the scan wouldn't they have given her another picture of the Spawn of Knob ? Isn't that the thing where you have to go with a really full bladder to get a better image ? He would want to see that, surely ?
Scant details here.

Oh heck PseudoBadger this thread is filling up fast. We need some more suggestions for imaginative new thread titles.

We need to include the phrase " Don't call the Midwife"..

"Helen is staring into the Cowpat of Destiny"

Drowning in?

"Have you heard about the tie-backs? It's nearly time for the Ambridge curtain committee meeting!"