We love Charlie. But we want Adam and Ian to get married. What will happen in Ambridge in the pre-Christmas thread?

[PseudoBadger]

Just listened to Friday - we are 2 weeks from Christmas and David didn't even ask whether Ruth will be back by then?

We haven't been told what "bargains" it was that Knob bought. I bet it's 100% grossly overpriced baby stuff because SOK can't be expected to use hand-downs from Henry.

I noticed they push the 'awwight!' button last night for Henry. My confused.com Brian toy has more stock phrases than he does.

I suspect I'm a bit like Lilian crossed with Lynda IRL ...

I don't think Helen can argue with Rob any more because he's gaslighted her to such an extent that if he tells her something's right, then she thinks she must be confused. Remember when he hid the chequebook? That was proper gaslighting. And also Cowpat (love that!) agreeing with him undermines her POV still further

I think I'll do the

New thread after

Present wrapping tonight

Unless it's needed earlier

I am from a very traditional West Country village, with very traditional parents (I think my mother is that last person left alive who replies to a wedding invitation in the 3rd person).
To this day I refer to all people senior to me in either age or status as Mrs, Mr, Dr, Lady etc. I simply cannot bring myself to refer to them as Jane or John until they tell me to do so.

Thread filling.
Look forward to the new one,Pseudo, but you don't need to gift wrap it.
A festive recycled bag will be fine.

I reckon Robs present to Hellin will be a very expensive "Eterinity" ring accompanied by some chilling statement about how now that he has her they will be together for ever.....

I notice he said 'I'll help you with the cooking' on Christmas Day. So the offer of soup if she was 'good' was just temporary, she'll be back to doing her proper wifework while he just 'helps'.

Meolscop remember the salmon/steak fiasco ?
He will probably try to take over in the kitchen and rustle up so,thing extra delicious and nutritious ( which Henry won't like).

Rob will buy Helen size 8 pyjamas and replace the label with a size 16 one

He will buy Henry a dog basket

Helen has always been weak and easily floored. The kind of person who has to take to bed for a week because someone sneezed within earshot.

Of all the people to fall easily into a controlling relationship it was always going to be her I suppose out of all the other options on the show. And I guess it needed to come from a relationship with a new character. Although it would perhaps be more interesting if it was someone who was born and breed ambridge.

I can't imagine a more stressful Christmas for Helen. PG, small excited child needing attention, Rob to keep happy, dinner to cook, washing up...... Oh, he'll help out but she will be yearning to be amongst the family with plenty of people to entertain Henry and helping out in the kitchen if she feels up to it.

The Boxing Day Hunt could be interesting. It's a social coup for Rob being master and probably impresses Justin no end.
A good turn out of SABs and a temper tantrum from Rob would be ideal.

But I still expect an ambulance at the Cottage.

Maybe he will insist on Henry going on the Boxing Day hunt and he will get hurt

Although still hoping rob has a riding accident and ends up at Helens mercy as he cant move from his bed 'if you're a good boy I'll bring you some soup'

It would be good if she could turn the tables on him!

MeolsCop I might be from somewhere nearby even smaller, but I'm in exile these days. When people graduated from the Sticker pantomime they move to the local amateur operatic society. I had never thought about it being like Lynda's productions before, but now I'm imagining which of the locals (who I love dearly) would be in Calendar Girls. I'm itching to name drop some potential stars, but it's just too small a place.

I gather EU sanctions on food exports to Russia are affecting several industries, including the fruit and veg growing in Spain. I mentioned it because, apparently, our dairy industry is badly affected because it used to export a great deal of milk to Russia for cheese -making in particular.

Doing my bit to fill the thread but knocking off now to pack and go TA-less for a few days.
Happy listening everyone.

Threadcis filling fast. From posts way upthread:
Yes I joticed Hellin awwwwright the other day when Knob was talking to her.
Yes I agree she has gone a bit too passive too fast but that may be because I always went down fighting regardless of the consequences she never even tries to disagree. I'd expect someone as manipulative as her to second guess when he was going try and try to manipulate her way out of it.
E.g. tree decs, but Rob it is so important now you are part of our family that you come and do family traditions to show you really belong at Bridge farm...etc. but Isuppose she didn't see that one coming.

And yes I thought it was interesting that she made a point of correcting Joe. It shows she is still conflicted. He did an awful thing to me but he looks after me so well.

The thing that pisses me off is he worries about her driving she crashes, he worries about her health she gets ill etc. I wish he would be telling her she cannot do something and she would manage just fine and then she could point that out to him. At tye moment it is making it look as is pg women really are rubbish and incompetent

Where's DDD to comment on posting rate? (And add some extra posts in the process)

And my prediction for christmas at the cottage. Brussel sprout showdown.

Now ears your sprouts Henry
No! (Henry's other stock phrase)
Now Henry. Eat your sprouts.
No!
That's it Henry. Go to your room. And don't come out until next year.

But Rob.
No Hellin. He has been a very naughty little boy.

Awwwwright. (Both)

Felpersham racecourse - pretty sure this has been mentioned before. Around the time Alice was born Brian was there with Mandy somebody who ran the Pony Club, thought to be having an affair with him at the time. Then I believe Brian bought Siobhan a part-share in a racehorse and took her to the races too.

I thought I heard Rob say that he would do the cooking, but I may have been wrong.

So pleased for the Grundys that at last things are going right for them, for a time. I rather liked the idea that they will end up eating a Farebrother goose alongside their turkey.

SmallLegs -

I agree with you Small, it's about time Rob wasn't proved right in his nonsensical predictions.