Massive Property headache - need hand hold

[propertydisaster]

So we bought a property back in January in our dream area. It is very much a doer upper.

just some back ground we’ve come back via different part of world and UK and have owned and renovated 3 lovely properties previously.

This is a very popular and pricey area we accepted we were going to have to make sacrifices and that the majority (4 yrs I’ve been keeping my eye on this market now so have insight) of properties that come up in our price band have been owned by elderly individuals and are in various states of needing updating.

We took a hit on the type of house (period and size/footprint) and immediate loc/plot (house backs onto primary school and on bus route, plus much smaller garden than would have liked) to be where we wanted to be and have what we hoped would be the money to renovate and make it really lovely/nicely speced. We pretty much immediately had to can any plans of even a small extension. No really biggie got over quickly. We really don’t want a massive house.

However it has taken us 8 months nearly of our architects dragging their heels and builders taking ages to quote to finally get the quotes back (5 in total) way way over, 50% over what the architects initially said (spec has not changed even they’re surprised). We have got the extra money together (parents) but there is no contingency.

DH has just had the conversation with me today that he thinks we should pull out. And sell cut our losses. I mean what would this even mean financially??

I can’t even cope, on some level I know he is right, this was never intended to be the forever but we wanted something really nice, for next 6-8 yrs. like I said we are in our 40’s with kids and have worked hard, and I know I know we’re lucky than most etc, but that’s not helpful in reality.

We’ve looked at de-specing but just feels like too much of a stop gap then and starting a the bottom, and even then it is objectively still an awful lot of money and emotional effort and time to be spending that on something that wasn’t really what we wanted.

As well things I was prepared to ignore and hopefully in time forget about (bus route school etc) for the original discussed figures felt doable, at this level it feels like a deal breaker.

we are in a rental and it is bloody awful, similar to the house we bought as in fully pensioner, plus v cold, damp, boiler on blink needs updating. The thought of been here any longer with no end in sight is pushing me over the edge. Nice rental properties are like hens teeth.

Just been to look at new build it goes against my very core, our previous houses have been such a reflection of us and what we love and have been laboured over, I am depressed at the thought of having something very likely poorly constructed and Homogenous - but I know I’m being a bit of a div.

What the heck do we do.

Nothing wrong with aspirations OP. Most of us have them. But you also need to be realistic.

You've started a thread about, in your own words, a 'massive property headache'. You've chosen the username 'property disaster'. You've complained that you don't like the property you live in and can't afford the property you want to live in.

Posters are giving you practical and financial advice and all you can hear is that other people have no aspirations. You would not have anything near this without your parents giving you 100k.

Most of us do it in steps on our own. We make realistic plans and adjust budgets. I started out in a 2 up 2 down terrace with no parking and no garden. Now I have a lovely detached period property with double garage, driveway and pretty, mature gardens. Aspirations are just that, something that you aspire to and work towards, not an instant gratification.

I hope you eventually find happiness in whichever property you end up in but your budget is fast decreasing so you do need to be realistic that you might only get so far and when the money runs out you may have to sell up (or beg more from your parents). Perhaps it is better to cut your losses now and just buy somewhere you can live happily?

**We thought we'd cracked it, it's all very well people saying just move in, when in reality no one would really want to move into ahome they didn't like when they have some financial means to choose another option.

I know people think I am being spoilt but I don't understand what is wrong with wanting to update and make a really great, practical and modern family home out of something that is already there. I suppose the mistrust in any sort of aspiration or wanting a simpler life (spoiler alert the rest of the developed world don't wash their smalls in the kitchen and hang them out to dry next their bedroom radiator) is why the UK finds itself in the position it does.**

Oof OP.

No one is saying you're spoilt because you want a nice house. Lots of the posters here on the Property board are aspiring to have larger, nicer houses with all the things you've listed - and much more besides.

No one is saying there's anything wrong with having dreams and goals.

What we're saying is that you're here wringing your hands about a "disaster" while making your financial problems worse by spending MONTHS renting a property while leaving a perfectly serviceable one empty.

You talk about having "financial means to choose another option" - but you don't? You're spending your renovation money on renting. All of that money you spent on renting would have added up to a big old chunk of cash that could have bridged that gap.

No one is saying you're spoilt because you have great plans for this house. People are saying you're spoilt because you want it ALL done at once, and while you aren't living there. That's great if you can afford it but the blunt truth of the matter is that you can't afford it. You've already leaned heavily on your parents repeatedly to finance the work - and you're still priced out of the project. In the meantime, you're pissing this much-needed money down the drain while this vanity project has stood empty for months.

And being sneery about people who have smaller houses - well, with that unpleasant comment, you've just shown us exactly who you are.

I'm done here. I'm beginning to feel that the motivation behind this thread was not a genuine desire for advice, which the OP has now had a great deal of and clearly doesn't want to take on board. Plus I'm tired of all the stereotyping, which is bordering on hate speech imo.

It’s not an aspiration thing. It’s a you need it done thing. Having seen your updates I would do the main house. Then move in. When your do the garage then knock through. Then you have everything you need. Yes it’s a pain you had to wait but with the garage being separated your not going to have to physically deal with the Reno in the same way. It’s exactly what we have done.

And the only reason to not do this is the ceiling. There’s always a ceiling. Until a house breaks it.

People can and do 'aspire' to things but you aren't aspiring, you are acting like a a child that is tantruming because the must have toy you want is out of your parents budget.

People who 'aspire' get there by sacrifice and work to get what they want... they don't sit on their arse for 9 months bitching no one else is doing the work for them and expecting mummy and daddy to double the budget.

My aspiration was to travel lots and be mortgage free by 40.

Horses for courses.

And being sneery about people who have smaller houses - well, with that unpleasant comment, you've just shown us exactly who you are.

Yep I thought the same, it’s laughable really because OP can only afford the small house and that’s with the bank of mummy and daddy helping, the irony!

Will you get the same interest rate on a new mortgage?

honestly just fix it up and move in, if you don’t like it when it’s finished move on.

House prices in St Andrews have apparently fallen 8% in the last year. Of course your EA is going to encourage you to sell it and tell you it is worth more now.

19% of current listings have had to reduce their prices.

Idk what rate you got last year but the rate I can get has gone up 1.2% between May and August and the BoE will probably raise the base rate again tomorrow.

So, good luck with it all, eh?

May good tidings wash over good people.

It’s got nothing to do with aspiration and everything to do with wanting the moon on a stick and then moaning when you can’t have it.

I do not know about the St Andrews market, and obviously, I do not know the details of your particular house but based on what I can see rightmove, I would be astounded if the house as you have described it - with all its problems about bus route, actual road it is on etc - warrant spending 200k on renovations. I do not see the issue about whether you can afford it, whether you continue to rent while renovations are done etc; if you spend that much on this house, you are extremely unlikely to get your money back. If you ever needed to sell, you would suffer from being the most expensive house on the street. You do not want to be that gouse. Far better to be the cheapest house - being dragged up by its neighbours, not the other way round.

Now, if you were either (1) a multi-millionnaire and could easily afford to overspend without worrying or (2) knew with certainty that you would never need to leave the house before you died and you could somehow afford the renovations, then it might be worth proceeding. But I get the impression that you are in neither of these categories so I would suggest NOT renovating. So I think you should only look at other options - which you have clearly identified.

Good luck with your eventual decision.

Brilliant to be aspirational, however you are borrowing 40,000 from your relatives!!!!!!!!!

As above there is nothing aspirational about being in your forties and needing to beg from your parents. Live within your means - it’s sometimes just not possible to have everything you want.

What did you want from this thread OP?

According to the thread title, she was after a hand hold. I think a reality check has been proffered instead.

As someone who has done something similar - be realistic, you don't need the entire house in fantastic condition to move in. Below are the decisions we made.

And it's entirely up to you whether you dry washing in your bedroom - in a biggish house you could easily put an airer in another room, line dry in the garden or plug a condensing tumble dryer in somewhere.

• do safety critical, security and really disruptive stuff first - electrics, stairs, roofs, windows, doors.
• you just need a bathroom, do one now. The other can wait until later on.
• plumb washing machine (and tumble dryer?) into the garage soace. No, it won't look like a beautifully designed utility room but it'll do the job.
• either get a structural engineer to do the calcs for moving wall and then do the kitchen, or design a kitchen to fit into the space you have with the possibility of extending it in the future. TBH kitchen designs often work better after living in the space and seeing how it 'works'. Are your kitchen designs realistic or have you gone high end? We got a mid-range Howdens kitchen in the October sale and it cost £6k for the (big) kitchen.

And sit down and think realistically about lifestyle. I don't mean boot rooms I mean, do you want to be able to walk to local amenities or spend time driving there? Where are the places you go to several times a week? How do you get there? Where do your children's friends live?

From the far side of buying in a fantastic location but a less than ideal house, the location is what has really made the difference to our everyday lives.

No one has a problem with aspirational. The key call out from this thread is how much money you’re wasting, by not moving into a liveable house because you don’t like the wallpaper.

A ton of people on this thread will have done up properties and lived in the ‘before’ of their current homes. The only people I know who’ve bought projects and waited for perfection before moving in were incredibly wealthy.

It also sounds like your shortfall could probably have been covered by what you’re paying in rent.