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Original poster

Offered our dream house but…

184 replies

Battleaxx · 01/04/2023 09:27

we were moving away!

So we have sold our house to a cash buyer, in preparation for a big relocation across the country to be near my parents in Cambridgeshire. We haven’t found a place there yet, it’s ridiculously expensive but we’re looking hard.

Yesterday I was called by an old friend who lives in a beautiful house in our town. It is our dream house and we’ve always said if we could choose any house that would be it: bright, spacious, lovely garden, on a lane and backing onto a nature reserve. Still within walking distance of school and work. There are only 3 houses on the lane and they never come up for sale. Friend is selling and said we could buy it privately and get a bit of a discount as she would save agent’s fees.

What do we do? It’s like handing in your notice and being offered a massive pay rise! We have very good reasons for relocating, primarily being closer to my parents but also more work opportunities. The flipside is that it’s more expensive and we’d be living in something much less good. We are settled where we are but had psyched ourselves up for the move, identified schools, got the kids on board, got family excited that we’ll be nearer etc.

OP posts:
LadyVictoriaSponge · 01/04/2023 16:20

Dream house without a doubt, imagine relocating and being stuck in a non dream house and still not getting much support from your family, support and visits are never guaranteed, if you live away people make the effort, if you live on their doorstep you are always ‘available’ so you may not get the support you think after the initial flush of excitement from your family when you move to their town.

clarepetal · 01/04/2023 16:44

boboshmobo · 01/04/2023 10:08

I'd take it and live in it for 10 years then move nearer your parents if needed . If they are still working then they are surely fine ?!

This!

BatshitIsTheOnlyExplanation · 01/04/2023 16:48

What sort of work do you do?
If you are in biotech or tech, a move to Cambridge will probably serve you extremely well.

Otherwise, I'd buy the dream house.

CrocodileFrog · 01/04/2023 16:48

If you buy the house and regret not relocating, you can still relocate in a few years.

If you relocate and regret not buying the house, you will never have the chance to buy it again.

Floralnomad · 01/04/2023 16:52

I wouldn’t buy a house from friends that I wanted to keep as friends .

Countquack · 01/04/2023 17:01

I have a friend who sold their house to be near to family. Life happened and the original family members moved away. So now she’s there on her own in an expensive area.

Thelittlekingdom · 01/04/2023 17:24

Cambridge is very tech science heavy if that’s the industry you want or are in that’s great. I previously worked in marketing and found it the companies weren’t what I really wanted to market. We also moved to be near family and there’s a lot of pressure to see them most weekends.

Ishouldbeoutside · 01/04/2023 17:50

Having moved twice to be near family and both times it was a disaster, I would say dream house without question. You’ll bitterly regret it if you don’t.

lemonyellows · 01/04/2023 17:52

Another dream house vote.

Guavafish1 · 01/04/2023 17:54

Life's too short... I would move closer to my loved ones.

LemonSwan · 01/04/2023 17:54

Sometimes these things are just meant to be. This sounds like one of them.

Elaina87 · 01/04/2023 18:07

Everyone seems to be confused why you're moving close to your parents when they're not elderly - I'm guessing it's so they can see more of the kids/help out with childcare. For me it would come down to the kids and how they feel, (that's if if you're not desperate for more help with childcare from your parents). Not sure how old your kids are but even if they're they're on board for a big move they may be happier staying if they are settled into school etc. Are they happy where they are? Are you ok for childcare? If so, I would probably stay put and buy the dream house instead of up-rooting them. Then arrange lots of visits to parents and they come to you in your nice new house.

Idontgiveagriffindamn · 01/04/2023 18:12

I don’t think I’d buy a house from friends. What if you do something they don’t approve of or there’s an issue they didn’t tell you about? Could lead to a falling out

Original poster
Battleaxx · 01/04/2023 18:20

My friend is moving abroad so I don’t think what we do with the house would be a big issue. Not that we’d do anything drastic anyway. Agree that there is potential to fall out but she’s asking a fair price so hopefully it would be ok.

Being near family is so that we can see them more easily and perhaps some support with the kids. At the moment it’s a 4.5 hour drive which feels so far.

OP posts:
Original poster
Battleaxx · 01/04/2023 18:22

But I hear what people are saying about the moving closer not always working out. It’s possible that the drive won’t feel so difficult when the kids are older, but at the moment it’s hard enough that even going to my parents for the weekend is impossible as we’d spend the whole time travelling.

OP posts:
Ishouldbeoutside · 01/04/2023 18:26

Maybe your parents need to visit you more ?

Eas1lyd1stracted · 01/04/2023 18:29

I think you should buy the dream house.

You said we 'were' moving which in your heart means you don't want to do it any more.

You can't afford to buy anything suitable where your parents are and houses prices are lower than they've been for a bit in quite a few areas.

Enjoy the house for a few years and then you could think again about plans including renting dream house out and having a trial run in the new area to see if you love or hate the idea.

However if you are massively close to your parents and you are in desperate need of the support I'd say try a move.

NoBerryJamOnToast · 01/04/2023 18:31

I'd buy the house. I reckon you'd spend a long time regretting it if you don't. If it's not for you, then you can always move.

Pipsquiggle · 01/04/2023 18:34

Where do you live now?

You might not be able to afford Cambridge in the future.

Best piece of advice I was given was - move when your DC are in primary school. A lot easier than secondary and you meet other people to establish your friend network at primary school. You don't really meet other parents at secondary school.

We moved and have never regretted it

Original poster
Battleaxx · 01/04/2023 18:43

We currently live in the SW. Feels like already we can’t afford Cambridge! But I’m aware that if we don’t move now we might be stuck until kids finish school

OP posts:
Mirabai · 01/04/2023 18:54

Can you say what town you’re in now?

Largeflaskoftea · 01/04/2023 18:56

What county are you in now? I live in Cambridge and it’s very over-rated, Cambridgeshire is a very dull county imo!! You could also end up being priced out of Cambridge and end up in some remote village.

Id go for the dream house, especially as you already have a good life there.

Thelittlekingdom · 01/04/2023 18:56

Cambridge is expensive. I wouldn’t say it is all that either. I think if you’re happy where you are and like where you live, you have the option to move when the kids have finished school or your parents can move to you. Maybe they need to visit you a bit more.

Mirabai · 01/04/2023 18:58

Ok SW - I can Cambridge might offer more jobswise and is commutable to London, good state schools, but it’s small town.

For me a bigger house overlooking a nature reserve has a lot to offer.

Would it not work better the other way? That in 10 years or so your parents move down to the SW, they’d be able to bank some money from their house sale.

Mirabai · 01/04/2023 19:00

Largeflaskoftea · 01/04/2023 18:56

What county are you in now? I live in Cambridge and it’s very over-rated, Cambridgeshire is a very dull county imo!! You could also end up being priced out of Cambridge and end up in some remote village.

Id go for the dream house, especially as you already have a good life there.

I agree, it’s basically just fields.

If you’re in the SW you’d swapping fields for fields - and a smaller house.

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