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Original poster

How do you cope with the stress of moving house?

322 replies

YukoandHiro · 12/10/2022 03:42

We're on a tight chain. If we don't exchange and complete within the next 2.5 weeks we'll lose our buyer as their mortgage lender won't give any more extensions to their offer (there have been endless complex delays with the paper work and we lost our onward purchAse so it's all take months)
It's touch and go whether or not we'll get moved or the whole thing will collapse.
I haven't actually slept for NIGHTS now. I'm exhausted and totally wired. I'm spending all my days on endless phone calls feeling frustrated and my work is suffering too.
We have two kids too so we still have to get them to school etc through all this. Honestly feel like I can't cope at all!!

OP posts:
Hunkyd0ry · 13/10/2022 21:21

Think ours will be a bit longer as they want us to get a few things checked and signed off before hand. I’m not really in a rush as we don’t have anywhere to go yet!

FuzzyPuffling · 14/10/2022 06:40

I spent so much of yesterday chasing. My buyers solicitors are dreadful...really slow. They have had responses to enquiries for over 2 weeks and haven't even looked at them. Even my buyers are fed up with them ( but they can do something about it). Everyone who can is chasing them....they don't seem to care.

My onward purchase is about ready to exchange.

I don't know what I can do to expedite matters. Other people's lousy solicitors are the pits.

warofthemonstertrucks · 14/10/2022 07:27

This was me in March. I didn't realise at the time but the stress had a huge effect on me. I had cause to look through some
Emails the other day and happened upon one from our truly useless solicitor and it bought it all back.

When we finally completed (at ten past five on moving day with all our stuff on the driveway of the new house getting snowed on) I actually broke down in tears with relief which is something very unlike me-the DD's were agog!

Stick at it, but also try and take an hour or so a day where you determinedly don't think about it.

Best of luck to all stuck in moving hell!

HitsAndMrs · 14/10/2022 07:56

I don't. 4 weeks from due date with 3rd child. Our house was all packed up and the bottom of the chain has just pulled out on the day of exchange. We now have to wait for our buyer to find a new buyer before out mortgage offer runs out. It's an awful process and one I don't want to do again. Hope it all goes okay for you.

AltheaVestr1t · 14/10/2022 08:02

Not in this position at the moment but I've been in it a few times and I know how stressful it is! Solicitors are actually very good at pulling it all together at the last minute so while it might seem like things are not in hand, they probably are. Use your excess energy for the things you can control - get as packed and prepared as you can in advance, it makes the last few days much easier. Good luck!

Reallybadidea · 14/10/2022 08:24

@HitsAndMrs I'm so sorry, that is awful. Fingers crossed that your buyers can find someone else quickly. What's the market like where you are? FYI in case it helps speed things up, our vendors are purchasing a house where someone pulled out at the last minute. They were able to purchase the searches and, I think, the survey which the previous buyers had done, which really speeded things up. Fingers crossed for you 🤞

HitsAndMrs · 14/10/2022 08:27

Reallybadidea · 14/10/2022 08:24

@HitsAndMrs I'm so sorry, that is awful. Fingers crossed that your buyers can find someone else quickly. What's the market like where you are? FYI in case it helps speed things up, our vendors are purchasing a house where someone pulled out at the last minute. They were able to purchase the searches and, I think, the survey which the previous buyers had done, which really speeded things up. Fingers crossed for you 🤞

Thank you! It's definitely slowing down, the buyers pulled out as their mortgage offer ran out and they couldn't commit to the new offer which is fair enough, it's just so last minute.
That's really good about the searches, everything has been done so hopefully this works out - solicitor said this can be done but the searches has a time limit of ? 2- 3 months. Everything is so time sensitive. Conveyancing must be a stressful job.

Reallybadidea · 14/10/2022 08:37

So had none of the estate agents/solicitors involved realised that the bottom of the chain had a mortgage expiring? How had everyone agreed on an exchange date if it was after their mortgage expired? What a mess, I'm so sorry.

Original poster
YukoandHiro · 14/10/2022 12:00

@Reallybadidea no it's a v long story - our freeholder raised extensive issues around the lease and took months to resolve them (there's still one that is being resolved on Monday, we're promised). And in that time we lost our onward purchase as they wouldn't wait. So then we had to find another house, and rush through the work on that.
We first put our flat on the market in April 2021 and it took a year to even get a buyer so if this falls the whole thing is dead and I'm pretty sure we'll be stuffed.

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Original poster
YukoandHiro · 14/10/2022 12:01

Oh @HitsAndMrs I'm so sorry you're doing this in the third trimester. I'm thinking of you xxx

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WimbyAce · 14/10/2022 12:53

We were trying to buy and sell this year (actually started the process last year) and I ended up horrendously stressed. Were various delays and in the end it fell through but actually I'm OK about it now. We may try again next year.

Reallybadidea · 14/10/2022 14:43

YukoandHiro · 14/10/2022 12:00

@Reallybadidea no it's a v long story - our freeholder raised extensive issues around the lease and took months to resolve them (there's still one that is being resolved on Monday, we're promised). And in that time we lost our onward purchase as they wouldn't wait. So then we had to find another house, and rush through the work on that.
We first put our flat on the market in April 2021 and it took a year to even get a buyer so if this falls the whole thing is dead and I'm pretty sure we'll be stuffed.

I have everything crossed for you

Original poster
YukoandHiro · 14/10/2022 19:27

Heading into the weekend is the worst! Nothing we can do til Monday now.

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FuzzyPuffling · 15/10/2022 07:26

Here's to a peaceful weekend for everyone. We can't do anything so let's relaaaaax. ( Yeah, like that's going to happen!)

I've got covid/ flu jabs today so am fully prepared not to care one bit for a few days! (Auto immune condition, don't react well to vaccines) Might pop to Lidl this morning for easy food!)

MaggieMagpie357 · 18/10/2022 12:36

Any news @YukoandHiro ??

Original poster
YukoandHiro · 18/10/2022 14:54

Nothing concrete. Lots of positive noises from the mortgage broker about releasing the funds tomorrow - still waiting for our freeholder to sign the leasehold paperwork. I'm so furious

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Reallybadidea · 18/10/2022 15:31

Arrrgh, that's so infuriating - so close, yet so far!

We still haven't exchanged because our vendors have decided to ay silly buggers and change the completion date. We all agreed on it about 6 weeks ago, I've got movers and dog-sitters booked and they're now saying it needs to be 3 days' later or the whole thing is off. We're livid but have agreed, waiting to hear from our buyers 😭

Original poster
YukoandHiro · 18/10/2022 19:37

Oh god @Reallybadidea poor you! The stress is just unbearable.
Luckily ours is only a chain of three and everyone in it is highly motivated... we're just relying on various faceless solicitors to get everything through for us. I'll be gutted for our buyers too if this all falls through. This is their chance to get on the ladder!

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mistletoe1 · 18/10/2022 19:49

We’re hoping to exchange this week and complete next. I think we’re basically good to go from tomorrow but my solicitor does not fill me with confidence. I have to check and check absolutely everything.

Reallybadidea · 18/10/2022 21:23

YukoandHiro · 18/10/2022 19:37

Oh god @Reallybadidea poor you! The stress is just unbearable.
Luckily ours is only a chain of three and everyone in it is highly motivated... we're just relying on various faceless solicitors to get everything through for us. I'll be gutted for our buyers too if this all falls through. This is their chance to get on the ladder!

Yes, same here - from what we understand this is the last chance for our buyers too.

I hope you have some good news tomorrow

Original poster
YukoandHiro · 18/10/2022 21:24

Good luck @mistletoe1 - we are also aiming for exchange and completion by the end of next week. We're stuffed if it doesn't happen.

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Original poster
YukoandHiro · 18/10/2022 21:24

I've got a bloody uti now from all the stress of it

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Reallybadidea · 18/10/2022 21:24

mistletoe1 · 18/10/2022 19:49

We’re hoping to exchange this week and complete next. I think we’re basically good to go from tomorrow but my solicitor does not fill me with confidence. I have to check and check absolutely everything.

Fingers crossed for you too. I feel similarly that if I wasn't constantly chasing everyone then nothing would happen.

bombemma · 18/10/2022 21:35

Hands down the most stressful thing I ever went through in the past 18 months was selling my house and buying my lovely new home. In that time I went through losing my little sister to very tragic circumstances, messy divorce and my business collapsing. Nothing comes close to the stress of trying to bug and sell a home in this country.

Movingtomorrow · 18/10/2022 22:12

I should change my username to 'Movinglastweek'. It was 9 months and 3 estate agents for us. How do you cope? Not sure I did to be honest. I feel quite bruised by the whole process, and ours was relatively straightforward. The whole process is shockingly complex and convoluted. Last time we moved - 15 years ago - it was nothing like what we've just gone through.