Am I mad to move up north alone?

[Rozziie]

I've been looking to buy in London for the last 6 months (taking 2-3 months off for personal reasons) and I'm just at the end of my tether. When I started looking, I didn't quite have my deposit together and wanted to get an idea of what I wanted and didn't want. Finally got the full deposit saved now and looking to buy in the next month and it seems like there's about 1/10 of the flats that were available in April/May, and those that are on the market are more expensive and less good than what I saw then! Seems like they are disappearing very quickly as well, when it was definitely a buyers' market just a few months ago.

I just feel exasperated to the point of tears. I'm 36 years old and have worked so hard to get to this point, sacrificed a lot to try to get some financial security, and I still can't afford to buy a poxy one bed flat. People keep asking me why I don't move out of London and there are reasons why I don't. It's nice to be somewhere with so much going on culturally, plenty of dating choice for women my age, etc. I've got some family here, and friends. But it's really grinding me down that I'm still renting and dealing with nonsense from landlords. I thought I'd have definitely bought somewhere by the end of this year and now it looks harder than ever.

I've had a look at places like Sheffield and I could buy a 3-bed house with a garden for cheaper than a poky flat here (although I understand there's loads of competition for these at the moment?) or a one or two-bed flat for less than half the price of one in the London surburbs, in the city centre, walkable distance to bars, restaurants, and the mainline train station. Work (London) might be a bit tricky but I could maybe try to only go in once a fortnight or so. Right now I'm paying £1300 to rent a tiny flat in London to go to the office once a week and work from home the rest of the time, which is just awful!

My main worry is that it would end up being even more isolating and lonely than living alone in London already is. I don't really know anyone there at all, and this is quite an awkward age to make new friends. I wouldn't have a workplace to go to. I don't know about the social and dating scene, but when I lived in Manchester it was really bad...most men my age had kids already and that's a dealbreaker for me, I think.

What would you do if you were me? Bite the bullet and try something new or stick to London and suck it up, living in a really far-out surburb or a not nice area?

Op what are your interests and hobbies? Apart from working in IT, what else do you like?

What do you do with your down time?

What about Bristol harbour www.onthemarket.com/details/10822505/

How much do you have to spend?

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/76021053#/?channel=RES_BUY

Central Bristol house

Or if you want somewhere smaller a leamington spa is buzzy and lots of work opportunities in the area.

www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/property/leamington-spa/

Leamington spa is an hour and a half to London by train and stunning town, really beautiful with lots of cafes, bars, big businesses

@Rozziie my advice if you like Sheffield would be a flat in kelham island.
They have a fantastic community vibe, mostly your age group.
Lots going on.
Feels very safe.
You would soon have friends and everything is on your doorstep.

@Rozziie this was according to my estate agent, in the summer people are on holiday etc etc and generally not thinking about putting houses on the market so there is a lull which usually picks up in September. Same in winter, lull in December while people are busy with xmas etc and picks up in January.

I live in south west Sheffield. PM me if you need any info

45 mins is obviously different than london-sheffield. In an emergency my parents can get here quickly. For example.

London is full of people with no family connections there, it shouldn't be a reason to not move the other way. Never living more than an hour away from your parents sounds quite parochial, we're about 3h from PIL and much further from my DP, and in 30 years there are only 2 situations that I'd consider an emergency (a premature birth and unexpected death) and friends and neighbours helped in those situations until the closest family could get there.

OP, what area of tech do you work in? There are jobs in the north but the market will feel different to London, there are fewer jobs in any location but also fewer people chasing them. But fewer jobs but living in a house you own vs lots of jobs but renting something smaller than my kitchen seems a reasonable compromise to me. Your rent is more than our mortgage for a 4 bed house in a very naice area of the NE .

@Rozziie I am in East Finchley. my DH is the fussiest man ever- he refused to consider any area outside north London (I think a choice quote from him was that 'dulwich was poor, polluted and the air was choking him'). Our budget was larger than yours -400k, but we also needed 2 bedrooms, good school catchment and it is not a great budget if you are restricted to north London zone 3. But we still found something! Don't give up!

@Rozziie

What about something like this?

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/108826685#/?channel=RES_BUY

I haven't read the whole thread but wanted to say I did exactly that when I was 32 and was a single parent of a 7 year old. I moved to near Sheffield 34 years ago because I couldn't afford to buy in London. The only difference was that I was a teacher so I could get a job almost anywhere. I have never looked back and would say Go For it.

@TedMullins

Come to south east! I bought my one bed in south Norwood for 200k in may, and there are still loads of flats in your budget in my area. I’ve lived in two northern cities as well as London and in my experience it’s much harder to make friends up north - people were more likely to have groups they’d known since school and to settle down younger, and were less inclined to let new people into their circles. In London I’ve made more friends than I ever had previously with a much more diverse selection of people. Don’t underestimate the cost of commuting either - even once a week a sheffield-london ticket would probably set you back over £100. I was almost tempted to buy a house in my hometown (Midlands) over lockdown but the monthly season ticket alone would have been £800!

Another vote here for South Norwood! It's really well connected (12 minutes to London Bridge if you time the train right!), it feels like something new opens on the high street every week and there are definitely places in your price range.

Why not rent or longer term air bnb for a few months, get to know the area and then commit to buy? If you are drawn to Sheffield try it out ! Peak District is gorgeous :)

Buy a flat in Sheffield, get your foot in the first rung of the property ladder however rent it out and use the rental income to start to your London flat buying fund.

Hand the property over to an agent so that you're not dealing with any issues. Et voilà win win you own a property and still live in London.

Actually I'd buy somewhere closer to London ie Kent/Essex so that you'd benefit from house price increases should you want to sell it once you have enough to buy somewhere in London.

Sheffield is lovely, I was born here and I love it.
Oughtibridge is a great area, lovely and green, and Loxley and Rivelin are also beautiful areas to live
You might not have considered Barnsley, buts it’s great, there are some fantastic places to live, near countryside and shops etc, and just over 20 minutes into Sheffield by train.
It’s got a great community feel and the houses in Old Town, just outside the town centre, are stunning. It also feels really safe. We sold our home there in December, last year, to buy in Sheffield. Our seller pulled out after nine months, so we’re moving back, around the corner from where we lived!
There are lots of places in both Barnsley and Sheffield you could look at.

@TedMullins

Come to south east! I bought my one bed in south Norwood for 200k in may, and there are still loads of flats in your budget in my area. I’ve lived in two northern cities as well as London and in my experience it’s much harder to make friends up north - people were more likely to have groups they’d known since school and to settle down younger, and were less inclined to let new people into their circles. In London I’ve made more friends than I ever had previously with a much more diverse selection of people. Don’t underestimate the cost of commuting either - even once a week a sheffield-london ticket would probably set you back over £100. I was almost tempted to buy a house in my hometown (Midlands) over lockdown but the monthly season ticket alone would have been £800!

This^^ I moved from the north west to London in the eighties and lived there for nearly 20 years. I found it far easier to make friends plus people I knew were already moving there for their career. People seemed far more open to making friends as often, they were in the same position as me, moving from another area. I moved out with exh with his job to a Chesire village and found it difficult. People tended to have had their family and long-standing friends for years so weren’t particularly open to meeting new people as they had their life sorted. Personally, I found it harder to connect with people who had never moved away from their childhood home apart from holidays. I did make lovely friends through playgroups etc when kids were small-interestingly though, none of them were locals but had moved into area similar time as me! Sheffield is university city though, so will attract plenty of people moving for work.

Hi OP, Sheffield is a fantastic city, I'm from there and now live in the Peaks after a couple of decades of living all over.

It's a very safe city, I'm not sure where PP is getting there information from about crime! It's very friendly, has a great cultural and music scene, multicultural, beautiful green spaces, tonnes of community stuff going on. Both of my parents and one of my sisters are still there, it's a great place.

Area-wise, for your budget I'd look around Hunters Bar or Banner Cross, Nether Green, Brincliffe and parts of Nether Edge, the southwest is the most desirable area.

You could get a three bed terrace like this.

Do it!

Also, don't listen to the PP about making friends, the SW of Sheffield is not a place people 'settle down young' and lead insular lives resistant to incomers! It's very cosmopolitan, has extremely high levels of professionals living there, and has the highest rate in the country for students staying after University.

My parents are in their 70s and still making new friends of people who have recently moved to the city, my mother's newest friend is a woman who's just moved from Hong Kong and my Dad's just made a new buddy at yoga. It's not some weird, 'local' Northern hell-hole!

It's a very safe city, I'm not sure where PP is getting there information from about crime!

I suppose if your experience of the city is based on what someone has told you about Parson Cross it will seem quite dodgy.

OP, as someone who actually lives in Sheffield I'd say it's really safe. Yes, some areas aren't great (but even then they're probably safer than similar areas in other cities) but on the whole it has a statistically low crime rate, and it feels safe to walk around, even at night.

If you do decide to move look at the south-west of the city. You'll get the best of both worlds there with all the amenities of a big city, but also a nice community feel and easy access to the Peaks.

[quote Rozziie]@GettingItOutThere I am...I don't like Manchester at all so not looking there, but Sheffield seems like a possible good option in that it's a decent size/population, stuff to do, near nice nature, and relatively decent links to London. And of course, could buy a house for the same price as a tiny flat in a rough bit of London! Just so worried about being lonely :([/quote]
Having lived in Manchester, I’m with you there. If you are going to do it, go for a city not a village.

I agree with @Subbaxeo. I moved from abroad to London, and then up to the Manchester area about 7 years ago. Although people are very friendly it’s actually hard to make friends because most people here has never moved away and had to make new friends. The friends I have are all either expats or Brits who have returned to the UK from abroad. Most other people have their friendship groups sorted and aren’t looking to add people to it.

If I were you I would not give up on my London dream just yet, alternative move somewhere fun nearer to London, like Brighton or similar.

I’m from Sheffield, I’ve lived here most of my life. What areas are you looking in? Often the cheap houses are cheap for a reason. There are definitely places to avoid.