school overstepping ?

[cax]

So my daughter is due to start reception in September, she is currently at private nursery. I have just found out that the school have arranged for someone from the school to visit my child at her nursery, i have not had the school she will be attending call or email me to ask if this is ok and the nursery have not contacted me to ask if this would be ok there end etc…. i’m feeling a little irritated that i have not been informed or asked if this was ok, of course it would have been if i had been asked as i understand why they do this, but to not even be in the loop of what is happening with my child has left me a little upset and i want to make a complaint but first want to make sure i’m not overreacting to the situation, any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

The nursery surely presume that among all the info you get regarding starting school, 'your child will be visited in their pre school setting' would be included! But nope, probably reams about colour of socks/ tights, pe kit etc etc. All the important stuff not random nursery visits.

Defini overreacting. I’m guessing it’s your first child when in these first few years everything seems a major big deal…though I don’t think I could ever get worked up about this

How far does this go? Are you expecting a blow by blow account of everything that happens in your child's vicinity during the nursery or school day? It just isn't going to happen.

The primary school obviously needs to communicate with the nursery about what sort of curriculum your child has been following, whether she has any problems, etc. You consented to that when you registered your child with the school. Your only complaint is that you weren't told precisely when they were doing it. Will you expect to be told in advance, for instance, every time her teacher is off school and she has a different teacher, when there's a new TA in the class, when a senior teacher comes in for an observation, when a parent comes in to help hear children read?

You’d like me as a teacher OP as we do inform parents, we ask for permission to visit child in setting (and also for the name of the setting as they come from lots of different ones!) We know nothing about these children and parents may wish to inform us of a SEND/anxiety need before we visit so I like to ensure parents know.
I can see the other side but this is how we like to do it and don’t argue against that but this is how we choose to do it.

What happens if your child doesn't go to nursery?

Our school did an invitation day. Two hours where the children got to know reception teacher, TA and a bit of orientation.

@Procrastinates

Procrastinates · Today 21:28
I can’t exactly pinpoint why I would want to know, but I would want to know.

The fact you can't pinpoint why you'd want to know surely shows you how bonkers it is? You want to know but can't think of any reason why other than because you want to? It's completely illogical.

No. I don’t think it’s bonkers. If someone is going to visit my child at nursery when I’m not there, I would like to be informed. Even if it is the school.

An outlier with the 30 LA maintained schools that I work with - I can’t take all of the credit! 😉

I'd go as far as to say the nursery sharing information about your child without your consent is a GDPR breach.

[I do understand the worth of these visits and all the efforts put into transition planning]

Why though? What difference would it make if you knew about it? Would you do anything differently, no, exactly so needing to know about it is indeed bonkers. It's for your child's benefit and the less of a deal that is made out of it the better.

They don't need your permission for this.

This is completely normal in schools. It’s just to allow the teacher to get to know the child and see them in a setting the child is used to.
Transition days are great but it doesn’t always give the teacher a lot of time to interact individually with the children so this is just an extra thing. It’s usually a very short visit and not something parents need to be there for.
Sometimes the visit needs rearranged for various reasons so the children aren’t always told in advance etc. I’m not sure why you’re angry about this, sorry!

I agree with you OP, I feel it's overstepping. The home visits even more so, very intrusive, you have every right to decline. Yes, they should have informed you that they do this, so many people here spouting "it's normal", have been conditioned to accept state intrusion into their lives.

@Procrastinates Well we can just agree to disagree. But I completely understand where op is coming from personally.

I think it is probably reasonable to expect a quick one liner, saying "teachers will be visiting your child in their nursery or home setting in the final term". Not everyone has older kids or knows that it is common practise. It is a fairly recent thing (in the grand scheme of things).

I know from being a teacher that these visits are pretty standard, so wouldn't have been surprised at my kid saying "mummy, today I did a jigsaw with my new teacher", as I could have figured out it was "visit day", but if I had absolutely no clue the teachers even visited, and my kid said they'd been doing something with their new teacher, I can imagine having a very confusing conversation with my child about how they can't mean their new teacher, because their new teacher works at x school, not in their nursery, and do they mean a new nursery staff member etc etc....

It's like if your young kid said "I did baking with granny at school today", you'd probably be confused/ disbelieving if neither the school nor granny had mentioned that there was a special grandparents baking day that took place every year. Especially if your child has an active imagination and often tells you fantastical things!

So I feel it should be shared info just so it doesn't really baffle people who have never heard of it happening :) We all learnt about it for the first time at some point (except a lot of mumsnet, who were born knowing the information).

As part of the initial school meeting talk they mentioned that they would either contact the nursery or do a home visits. Are you sure you didn’t miss them passing on that information at a session? There’s usually quite a lot of information being shared at these sessions.

I spoke to the nursery (thinking it was all unique) and they just said it’s very normal most of the time it isn’t a visit just a brief phone call. I’ve no idea when it happened or even if they did speak! (This was 16 years ago! But I still remember thinking it was going to be something really important- it wasn’t!)

honestly be grateful! makes everything easier for transition

This is perfectly normal and happens at all key transitions (nursery to KS1, KS1 to 2 if changing school and most especially at KS2 to 3!) I used to be a Secondary English teacher in the UK as well as Literacy Coordinator and the work the SENCOs and transition managers did was always excellent - it's to make sure that the school knows all about your child before they start, from allergies and any educational needs that may be emerging through to just what kind of kid they are. The SENCOs and transition managers have a huge job this time of year with it and I applaud them for it. It is no reflection on you as a parent.

(But I wouldn't raise it with the school though. It won't get you off to a great start, and you've got to work with the school for 7 years to come. :)

What information? That little ‘Lydia likes to play with trains’.

The school will have all official information already as the parent has applied for and accepted a school place.

It’s completely normal. They’ll only inform you if you are needed to facilitate a visit.

Helicopter parent alert!

You have got to relax a bit OP, schools don't/can't give every parent constant updates on their child.

It is a unusual step in UK school system. I assume it is up to you to engage with them to become familiar with the process and steps. There was a rather long thread last week on the same topic you find it helpful

Hardly helicopter parenting. Her child isn't even in school yet, so they absolutely should be at least making her aware of their plans, as at the moment, her child isn't even CSA, and is not their pupil.

School information is shared between the next stage, so nursery to Primary, Primary to Secondary. GDPR doesn’t apply to this @MBappse

Insane stuff.

My 4 year old DD starts reception in September. Has been visited at nursery 2 weeks ago. We loved hearing about it later.

her brother started reception amidst covid and none of this happened so we are delighted she’s getting all the transition stuff

I cannot for my life imagine what some people on Mumsnet get wound up about