Opt-out of religious service

[Dalooah]

DC is at primary school and there's an upcoming church service for Christmas. We are not keen on religious 'things' and was wondering what the best way it would be to opt out of this 'activity'. It's not based at school, it's a walk away at the church local to the school. Is it even a possibility to opt out? What would DC do if this was possible? What's the best way to ask?

Thanks!

No idea but intreigued by answers! My little is due to attend a CofE primary next year and I am worried about it!

What is it? Something like an advent service? If it’s out of school hours just don’t go. In school hours your Dc will probably be expected to go with their class but you won’t be.

Can you ask the school. I assume there will be a few who opt out. Me (atheist family) and my best friend (Jewish family) used to walk out of every day assemblies as well. Generally they have a religious flavour as well.

@EscapeRoomToTheSun why are you sending them to a CofE school if you’re worried about religious content?

Was wondering that myself. 🤔

If you don't like the idea of religious content in school then you really should reconsider your first choice of school for your child

What do you want to happen if they don't go and its school hours? Would you come to collect or expect a member of staff to miss out?

Parents can opt their children out of RE so you can refuse to let your child go to church ( I assume you would also opt out of all RE lessons, assembly, nativity, visits to other religious buildings etc) . However, as it will presumably be a whole school service, they would probably need to read a book in the school office or similar.

For many people the CofE school is the only one in the catchment area, in our case the catchment area we are in contained a choice of 2 schools, both CofE. There isn't an alternative a lot of the time, certainly wasn't for us.

I would just let them go (do they want to go?).
When I have been to such events in the past, it has been fairy inclusive, plus only asked to pray of you want to , also the kids LOVE walking there with their friends.

Probably depends on the school. If it is a church school then there is probably an expectation that all kids take part in some form. I think if you opted out of this then they would also expect you to opt out of other religious linked activities such as the nativity etc. Your dc may well feel he is missing out. As for what he will do, I guess he will sit in the office and read. All the other staff will be with the kids and walking to the church.

Yes, you can opt out.

Although as someone who went to a CofE primary, including the annual carol concert, it really doesn't indoctrinate you very well.

It is far more likely that it's a fun trip out.

As a matter of interest, do you celebrate Christmas?

So would you stop them be involved in Chinese New Year activities, or visiting a mosque or a synagogue? Surely these experiences are about opening their eyes to the world around them and understanding that different people believe different things?

Send them elsewhere then!

You can’t opt out of RE. It’s an academic subject.

You can opt out of collective worship but why would you? It’s not some satanic brainwashing ritual. Britain is culturally Christian so if nothing else, the church visit will be adding to their cultural capital. The reality is, if there is a service, it’ll be a little child-friendly talk that they will probably zone out of and a couple of nice happy songs. What is the problem with that?

Send them elsewhere then

To the non-existent entirely secular schools in England? Because you know all schools are REQUIRED by law to have religious content of a broadly Christian nature.

And close, good schools should be available to all children regardless of their parent's religion. I mean does t that sound like a human right?

We are a church school but, along with every other church school in our diocese, don't have church attendance as admissions criteria so we get children of faith and not. However, we have never had anyone not go the the church services! But, if you didn't want your child to attend, we wouldn't and couldn't force them. But we would expect that they didn't take part in the Nativity, Easter and other religious celebrations we hold either.

This

@UWhatNow
Schools have to teach RE but parents can withdraw children from all or part of RE lessons.

What is the risk of them learning about other people's beliefs, the traditions of Christians or Carol singing?

We didn't stop ours going to a Gurdwara or Synagogue. Surprisingly, some exposure to other faiths hasn't seen them convert. Surely understanding others leads to tolerance and acceptance in a multi-faith society.

Muslim friends seem to have managed to attend Mass without significant harm and attending Christian weddings hasn't seen them rejecting their own religious and cultural practices.

If they are celebrating Christmas, they"d probably benefit from understanding what it is all about.

If school services were effective at converting children to be Christians, our churches would be full.

As others have said, you may find you need to withdraw from nativity plays, Carol concerts etc etc.
Personally I would view it as cultural learning. He doesn't need to believe. He will learn how to behave in a church.

Do you want your child to choose their own faith, or follow yours? It’s unclear if you want to opt out as atheists or due to another religion.

If you want your child to make the choices for themselves then let them go so they can experience a Christian Christmas (assume you don’t celebrate Christmas) but if want them to follow your faith then withdraw them
on religious views and keep return them to school when the service is done.

You can probably opt out but it would be a shame. Visiting all kinds of places of worship can be really interesting for children and gives you the perfect opportunity to discuss religious beliefs with your child. Plus they are likely to love walking there with their friends.

What's the big deal about them going?
At school they learn about may religions and festivals, this will prepare them for the world around them where they need to respect others beliefs. It seems ridiculous to pull them out to me because you don't have a faith, if you gave them the choice, I bet they want to go!