Hi,
I wanted to give an update.
The negativity continued, the comments were as follows:
Monday - He doesn't listen, he doesn't take instruction, I'm not sure it goes in fully (taps side of head), i had to spend so much 1:1 with him that I wasnt expecting, didnt know name of Preschool he attended despite having a class of only 13, majority of which had come up from their own preschool. Veiled threat of "i need the week with him before making a decision"
Tuesday - I had to sit 1-1 with him alot during swimming, he walked past the fountain and asked if it was the swimming pool (rolls eyes and smirks), he insisted with get into a box earlier (again rolls eyes and smirks), he kept getting up from his chair in the end we just let him get on with it...another "i need more time before making my decision"
Wednesday - Husband dropped him off as I was close to panic attack levels by this point. She asked if he'd had any friends at his last preschool (he'd formed at least 3-4 strong friendships with boys there, but he had a choice from at least 13 boys compared to the 3 far more developed boys in his class). My husband replied coldly "Its been two days". I didn't bother speaking with her at pick up.
Thursday - Drop off, son was very hesitant to go into the room, kept pulling his head into my leg, she kept asking him "can you get your water bottle out of your bag and put it on the side" after the 4th time of asking I bent down and softly said "shall we see if we can find this bottle" to which she snapped at me aggressively "no, no NO he must learn to do this for himself". To which he promptly burst into tears. He knows exactly how to do it for himself hes good at following instruction at home, but when he's not even sure he wants to go into your classroom lady he sure as heck isn't going to be getting his waterbottle out..read the room ffs! Avoided contact at pick up.
Friday - Met with Head of Pre Prep, we saw her sitting down with him just before we went in. Explained our concerns, primarily the boy to girl ratio, secondly the development gap and the negativity from teacher. He suggested SEN and apoligised on her behalf. At pick up she made zero attempt at being nice, straight away it was "childs name, has had an accident today". I then asked for his school blazer and she said are you sure you dont want to keep it for next week and I said no, i need to have it at home, at that point she knew and very coldly gave it to me and walked out of the classroom without a goodbye, it was like dealing with a 17 year old in high school not a supposedly experienced teacher at a reputable pre prep. That afternoon i unpacked his schoolbag and she'd put his clothes in there covered in unmentionable in a nappy bag, not even bothered to rinse out. He very rarely has accidents now so I knew that he wasnt happy. I don't think I'll ever forget his face, when I went to pick him up on Friday morning, being made to sit at a desk, looking ashen, when I arrived she tapped his head and said you can go now mummy is here.
We wrote a written withdrawal friday afternoon and have him starting at my old prep school next week.
I am still totally flummoxed at her behavior.