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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

How to deal with item being stolen from DS ar school?

179 replies

LMonkey · 16/12/2018 15:31

We gave DS a smart watch which cost £35 for his 6th birthday a week ago. We forbade him from taking it to school as obviously its too good a toy to risk losing. He was caught out trying to sneak it in to school one day. The next day he successfully sneaked it in to school but the teacher, knowing that he wasn't meant to have it (as he'd seen us take it off him the day before) quite rightly took it and kept it on his desk all day. He gave it back to DS at the end of the day. DS says he put it in his book bag, however by the time he had come out to me (right outside the classroom) it was not in there. We went back in, looked around with the teacher, no luck. The teacher posted a message to all the parents on the online journal that evening to ask the parents to "ask the children if they had seen the watch". He also asked the children about it next day in class. Still nothing.

How do you think I should deal with this from now? The teacher said that he had done all he could, and I accepted that initially, but now what is bothering me is that one of my son's classmates has taken the watch, either stolen it or maybe hidden it, and it's not being dealt with?? It's definitely one of the kids in his class. Surely it can't just be forgotten about so that the kid who took it thinks he can just take stuff and get away with it?

I do realise its 6 year olds I'm talking about here but surely it needs to be addressed!

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LIZS · 16/12/2018 18:03

Or he could have removed it himself in that short period, thought he'd put it back in (perhaps if he thought he'd be seen) and misplaced it.

moredoll · 16/12/2018 18:11

It sounds as if it got put into the wrong bag.
But there's nothing you can do. The school's done what it can.
It's a harsh way for your son to learn that's why schools say no valuables in school.

JuliaSevern · 16/12/2018 18:14

Agreed it's not the schools responsibility, agreed it's a lesson that's been learned but surely strealing property needs to be addressed
Can you give more information about what it is you think the teacher should do now that she hasn't done? If you were her what would you do?

sirfredfredgeorge · 16/12/2018 18:23

Whilst I don't think the school need to do anything at all beyond ask anyone if they've seen it (especially as it's not at all clear that it's been stolen, and as described I think it's unlikely) I am interested in the idea that "it's a lesson learnt" if it was stolen, since to me there are lots of lessons that could be learnt from such a case which are not "don't take expensive things to school", such as

The kid who stole it learning the victim is blamed for bringing it in.
The kids who know it was stolen knowing that they can get away with stealing.
The victim learning that their stuff isn't valued.

And even the intended lesson of "don't flaunt stuff others might want to steal" is not one I'm entirely comfortable with, there are good reasons not to flaunt valuable stuff at school, that someone might want to steal them isn't top of the list.

But I wouldn't expect the school to do anything beyond RebelWitchFace's suggestion of the assembly etc. if it was likely stolen as opposed to lost.

Original poster

LMonkey · 16/12/2018 18:27

I really think I've said everything in previous posts Julia

I appreciate though that this is now quite a long thread so people don't want to read everything from the beginning,

Cottonsock I really think a watch is more desirable than a single shoe, don't you? Kind of missing the point

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Bloodyfucksake · 16/12/2018 18:28

The teacher is probably thinking "I really need to get on with teaching these kids to read" while you are hoping for a full scale investigation into the disappearance of a watch that by your own admission should never have been taken into school.

Already there are two previous posters making crazy suggestions like "why didn't the teacher strap it onto the child's wrist" - because there are 30 children and they cannot start doing things like that or they would never teach anything.

Then the other poster who suggested the teacher is lying and did not put it in the book bag. Not many teachers would risk their employment for a child's watch. Come on.

This world is crazy.

JuliaSevern · 16/12/2018 18:34

I really think I've said everything in previous posts Julia
All you've said is it should be addressed in a more forthright way. What would that involve?

CottonSock · 16/12/2018 18:36

LMonkey, I think you are also missing the point that it's out of order accusing 6 year olds of stealing.

sackrifice · 16/12/2018 18:47

YES I KNOW!!! DOESNT EXCUSE ANYONE TAKING IT THOUGH DOES IT??!

You have no idea if this actually happened though do you?

headhurtstoomuch · 16/12/2018 18:47

Are you sure he didn't just drop it somewhere by accident? Assume the children were in the class when he went to put it in his book bag so how would they have known it was there?

spanieleyes · 16/12/2018 19:05

But what else do you expect to happen? The teacher has asked parents to look out for the watch, he has asked the children if anyone has seen it or taken it. What else could he do? I suppose he could call in the police or perhaps polygraph the children! Other than that, just what do you expect?

user789653241 · 16/12/2018 19:07

I think it really teaches him lessons. You really can't expect teachers to deal with these.
There are things you really need to keep it at home rather than taking it to school when you are young and be responsible.

CallMeRachel · 16/12/2018 19:08

Well if that's the case then why did they seek to take time out to remove the watch from his wrist in the first place?

Kind of contradictory when it suits teachers isn't it?

I think the teacher in this case has to take partial blame because he'd removed in the first place and not put it back where he'd taken it from. Something for teachers to consider in future perhaps?

Quite simply, if they're so busy they can't return the item to where it came from it should be held in the schools safe until a parent can come and sign it out.

Bloodyfucksake · 16/12/2018 19:11

CallmeRachel brilliant. Will you be happy if your child misses chunks of their education because they are playing all day with a watch? Or will you be happy to be called out of work to collect the watch?

spanieleyes · 16/12/2018 19:13

No, the teacher took it off the child and at the end of the day returned it to the child. It was the child who ( presumably) put it in his bookbag rather than on his wrist.

user789653241 · 16/12/2018 19:15

Tbh, if your son is 6 years old, there will be so many times that he will lose things over the years. And I really think you should make sure he wouldn't lose anything valuable. It really doesn't matter if it's stolen or lost. You lose it anyway. And you can prevent it.

Original poster

LMonkey · 16/12/2018 19:16

Kind of feel like I'm going round in circles.

Cottonsock I haven't actually accused anyone have I. This conversation is between me and Mumsnet. When we post on Mumsnet we tend to post our thoughts. My thoughts, or my worry, is that the likelihood, knowing the facts that I know, the children in the class, my son, the teacher and my understanding of the situation, is that the watch was probably taken. I have also said that it may have been hidden, which is also quite a likely thing for a 5 or 6 year old to do.

Like I said, I have not uttered the word 'stolen' to anyone.

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CallMeRachel · 16/12/2018 19:16

I think you've misunderstood me @Bloodyfucksake

I'd have no issue with the teacher removing the watch from my child (which would take all of 5 seconds) as long as it was kept safe and either returned securely to his wrist, bearing in mind he's 6 or if 5 seconds at the end of the school day is too much to ask of the teacher (according to a pp) then I'd expect it to be held in the school safe until I could come and collect it.

spanieleyes · 16/12/2018 19:17

But you've said it needs to be addressed. How?

near50andgotiddintesco · 16/12/2018 19:17

Can you go into the classroom and look for it yourself?

I’m sorry but it’s a hard lesson to learn for your son. I hope you find it.

I wouldn’t assume stolen. I’d veer more to dropped/fell out of bag /someone else looked at it and set it down.

LivininaBox · 16/12/2018 19:21

Just go into school yourself and look for it. My DS has often lost things at school, teachers have been u able to find it, and I have gone and found it myself

user789653241 · 16/12/2018 19:26

Great you are not accusing anyone. If it was fallen off the bag, it will eventually come back to you if someone find it.

Original poster

LMonkey · 16/12/2018 19:27

Addressed by perhaps having a slightly sterner word with the class? Asking them to check their bags there and then? Finding a way of letting the teacher know anonymously if they took it, where it is. Giving the class a talk about respecting people's property. Offering points if someone finds it. Just feel that it has been dropped. I know the school is busy but like a pp mentioned and I've also mentioned, if it has been taken what does it teach the child who took it if it just gets forgotten about?

OP posts:

Original poster

LMonkey · 16/12/2018 19:28

I did have a quick look in the classroom the day it was lost. I'd feel a bit cheeky asking to do it again if the teacher was there!

OP posts:

Bestseller · 16/12/2018 19:29

A useful lesson. Only tale things to school that you are prepared to have lost or broken DS

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