Teacher wouldn't let DS go to the toilet

[Louise1178]

What are the standard rules for toilet breaks in year 1?

I'm livid with the teacher as yesterday ds 5, wet himself at school. He says when he came in from lunchtime he needed a wee, but the teacher wouldn't let him go, he said he asked again after the first lesson and said he really needed to go, but she refused again. He held on until the end of the day but wet himself on the way to the toilet.
The afternoon runs for 2 and half hours with no afternoon playtime.

Would it be unreasonable to complain?

I have also never had an accident in the classroom. I did have a mum complain as I refused her daughter the loo in the afternoon, and she peed herself in the car. I pointed out the fact that she could have gone to the loo before her journey home.

I think it is absolutely fine to have an expectation that children use the toilets during break times BUT there will always be situations when a child cannot wait. Perhaps they have the onset of a UTI or tummy bug, perhaps they got hot and drank more than usual. It isn't up to the teacher to overrule the child's need. I think the sheer humiliation and psychological damage of being forced to wet oneself in front of your peers (or even the fear that your might have an accident) means that children should always be allowed access to a toilet - but the adult should use tools and techniques to manage that access on behalf of the class.

PerspicaciaTick

"Manage access on behalf of the class". Precisely the reason I do not let children go in lesson time. As soon as you let one go another 5 want to, much easier to refuse all requests

I would rather one child be distracted because he/she is desperate for the toilet, than have the whole lesson disrupted from children going back and forth to the toilet.

Horrified by some of the teachers comments on here. Older children might find it easier to hold it in but making a five year old do it is just cruel. At that age, they're still learning body cues and can easily forget to go.
DS is six and always forgets about the loo whenever he's absorbed with something, and doesn't really notice until it's urgent. That's normal for young children and they grow out of it.
I wet myself from having to hold it in when I was five and was teased for years about it. Wetting yourself as a child is just as humiliating as doing it as an adult, and going it because someone refuses you access to a toilet is beyond heartless.
OP, like others have said, I'd try find out a bit more but if it's like your DC says, then I would be putting in a serious complaint.

MissPeters have you not been desperate for a wee before? Your bladder starts to hurt. You get the shivers. It's bloody awful.
This isn't about the child simply bring distracted. They're distracted because they are so uncomfortable and possibly hurting that they can't think straight.
Good god, I feel sorry for the little ones in your class. How utterly cruel.

Yes I have been desperate for a wee, in class while teaching and unable to leave the children. My pupils are 8 and 9 they are old enough to understand my rules, and hold on until the breaks.

I am lucky as my classroom is opposite the girls loo, so I can monitor them but I dont even have a key for the boys` so I just have to trust them. I have been known to run to the loo and leave my class as I have a weak bladder myself and if I sneezed I would wet myself and I have done so in class. So I let them go but make sure they leave their mobiles on my desk as I have had teenagers take their phone to the loo and send texts etc!

tinytemper

If I was secondary teacher it would definitely be a no regardless of how close my class was the boys or girls loos. They should go at break time, only exception would be medical reasons.

I would rather one child be distracted because he/she is desperate for the toilet, than have the whole lesson disrupted from children going back and forth to the toilet.

No flexibility? No judgement calls? Just a flat out "I don't care if you piss yourself, so long as I get to follow my lesson plan".

You really aren't fit to teach EYFS and KS1 children are you?

I said earlier If I thought it was a true emergency I would let them as a one-off.

I dont teach KS 1, I am year 3 KS 2

But this is a thread about 5 year olds.
And how do you judge if it is a true emergency. How does the child prove their desperation to you?

Another teacher here. I've taught across EYFS, KS1 and KS2. EYFS is a little different as they have lots of choosing time and can use the bathrooms freely during this time. In other phases I don't allow toilet trips during input or 30 mins before or after a break time. I also don't allow children out of their chairs during input or activity time without permission. Frequent toilet trips are distracting and if one goes others will often also decide they need to go when I fact they don't.

I'm sorry if parents don't like it. However direct school hours, I make my rules for my classroom and they are applied to everybody. Parents dont get to dictate that their children can use the toilets when they see fit. I don't know many teachers that allowed parents to call the shots in their rooms!

Excuse typos, my iPhone has corrected a couple of words so that they don't make sense!

As a teacher you pick up the signs to recognize whether they really are bursting. I did say I disagree with stopping KS1 children but as soon as the hit KS2 they should wait until break times.

The toilets (especially girls) are quite a distance from the classroom. I do remind them to go at break and lunch as I will not let them later, so they have plenty of warning to make sure they have a wee

www.eric.org.uk/toileting-best-practice-at-school

Five year olds are very good at showing when they really need the toilet (especially those who don't ever ask).

In our school keystage 1 always are sent just before they are sent to lunch....but you cant always force a wee out.

Wonder71

Exactly, that also means if they cant force a wee out, they are not going to be at bursting point the minute they return to class

They soon learn the rules and take precautions. If they don't they hold it until break. Young children no, but once they get older it is outrageous to think a child cannot hold their wee until break

How would you feel If I as the teacher were to leave the class to wee during a lesson? Would you not say I should go during my break?

Also you have to take in account the dangers when letting children go out during lessons, anything could happen. This is another reason I say no.

I do wonder how these no divination from the rules would cope with my DS..Sometimes he takes himself to the toilet ( year 5) to give himself a breather from the classroom. He comes back and gets on with his work far better ( I am sure it isn't desperation sometimes) however the reality of him not getting out that classroom for a couple of minutes would be far worse for the teacher and class never mind himself..

I would also like to remind the we must follow the rules teachers.. These are not factory kids. Treat them as individuals yes if one friend goes and best friend asks 30 seconds later then obviously its a no. The child who can't focus because they need a wee let them go. My DS had an accident in reception because he was so engrossed in what he was doing he forgot never mind holding it in.

This is primary school and the place I want my child and everoyne else's child to develop a love of learning. If your children want to leave the room in that lesson they maybe you need to make it more interesting.

Is there a reason he needs a "breather from the classroom" and are staff aware of this need?

yes mrz and teachers are supportive of his needs... I don't think the need to go for a breather applies to every child ( to be clear) . Toilets are literally outside classroom door and it works.