Teacher wouldn't let DS go to the toilet

[Louise1178]

What are the standard rules for toilet breaks in year 1?

I'm livid with the teacher as yesterday ds 5, wet himself at school. He says when he came in from lunchtime he needed a wee, but the teacher wouldn't let him go, he said he asked again after the first lesson and said he really needed to go, but she refused again. He held on until the end of the day but wet himself on the way to the toilet.
The afternoon runs for 2 and half hours with no afternoon playtime.

Would it be unreasonable to complain?

And what about the children that haven't been diagnosed with anything at the time, but are later?

So your assuming that the children don't realize? They see the same children sit near the door and suddenly disappear without
talking to you to do a chore. You don't think peers will ask what chore lol

No child has ever asked me where xxx has gone. Like I say they are aware that they are only allowed if they have a medical problem so it is irrelevant

I'm talking about them asking their peers.
You also realize this rule brings attention to ones with a medical need? You have a rule only those medically required to can go.

But what about those that at the time haven't been diagnosed with anything?
Or the ones with a sudden stomach bug like a pp who didn't know until after going to the toilet? So far you have been lucky but how will you deal with the fallout if a student does have an accident? How are you going to deal with the stigma that child will go through and the teasing/bullying?

If they have not been diagnosed yet, but are under having bladder problems as an example their parents just write a note. I am unsure how I would deal with it if an accident did happen, but as of now no child as wet themselves.

Well then hopefully all the parents in the class realize this and write a note anyway.

Miss Peters

I hope the next time you refuse a child they pee in your class and you have to clean it up. You deserve it, if only to show you how ridiculous your toilet policy is.

No, no parent has written a note this year, so I just refuse all requests.

Misspeters - your attitude is inexcusable.

I deeply pity the poor children in your class. If you are this despicable over something as simple as toileting, I dread to think what other horrors go on in your classroom.

As you're a very new and inexperienced teacher, I can only hope the statistics surrounding the amount of new teachers leaving the career are true, and that you are one of them.

Bowing out now, with my head held high that my children's feelings and basic needs come above all else and I am proud to be an empathetic, kind and caring teacher of little ones.

IntheBenefitTrap

You are entitled to your opinion. No child or parent have ever had a problem with my toilet policy. The children seem happy and enjoy their school day.

user
Much as I don't agree with a total ban with zero discretion your "I hope a child wets themselves so you can clean it up" is just a bit silly.

MissPeters has said that she hadn't had that situation. Her students know her policy and it works for her.

I exercise discretion but my students know my default position is 'no'. They also know that I keep tabs on who keeps asking so if they're not desperate then they risk losing their chance so to speak (It's only a mental log of things to weed out time wasters but the fact the students know I'm paying attention means I tend to only get genuine requests). They know the score and as a result you're lucky if I have 3 students go to the loo during class all week.

It's inexcusable to refuse to allow a child anybody to use the toilet if they express the need to.

Clearly miss peters is not going to budge on this, so let's all just be relieved she doesn't teach our kids. Punishing every child in every class forever because one kid couldn't behave is pathetic.

Orangewalls

You would never have a full class if you let every child go to the toilet when they ask, especially young children, hence why I say no.

orangewalls
Whilst I'm not a fan of blanket bans it's very clear you've never had the ripple of bladder issues.

It's not uncommon to let a child who is desperate go (and I'm very much that one off being desperate is the only reason) before suddenly 'can I go after Simon? Can I go when Sophie gets back?' starts.

You could quite easily have an endless line if back and forth.

I make light of it and point out their bladders aren't connected and toilet trips aren't a contagious condition. They take the hint.

I doubt every single kid in the class asks to go every lesson or all at once.

Obviously toilet use would need to be monitored, maybe a pass system, only one child allowed at any time, repeat requests or messing about be dealt with etc. But a blanket 'no to everyone' isn't right.

Every individual should be able to decide for themselves whether they need to use toilet. I can't concentrate and get agitated if I need to wee, dread to think how a young kid feels if they are prevented from going.

My younger child was sitting in wet pants in school repeatedly because he was worried about asking to go to the toilet. He had sudden urges to go but would not tell them. He didn't tell me either because he didn't want to get in trouble (he wouldn't have with me but is a very conscientious child and very rule driven so didn't want to upset school) . I found his pile of wet pants. I was so upset for him.

My point being MissPeters - you may not know when a child is wet.

You're right orange you don't get every kid every lesson.

But it's disruptive to the lesson having people in and out of class. I don't think people really appreciate what goes into actually teaching a lesson and keeping 32 teenagers (or children if you're primary ) on task, well behaved and making progress for 5/6 hours a day.

I'm not bothered about getting into discussions about behaviour in the toilets or the usual topics etc. It's as simple as I want kids in class learning and I want a calm classroom with minimal disruption because that's how they achieve. I use my discretion to allow people out but would not accept a go when you like approach.

I don't see the need for a leave on demand approach once children are in juniors upwards. Part of life is learning to self regulate, manage breaks, not sit drinking litres of water and then wanting to be out of class (ks4 lads loved that one last term).

If I had stopped a child going toilet and they had wet themselves and I had noticed, surely the parent would have complained. I have never had a parent complain about me not letting them use the toilet.

had not noticed

Nicely put maisypops

Misspeters, do you see each pupil as individual human being?
Do you feel affection towards your pupils?
I can't feel any love from your posts.

My Year 1/2s are mostly continuous and enhanced provision with one small focus group. My classroom is busy and fun. Toilet in does not cause disruptions at this age.

Of course I feel affection towards my pupils

Not a problem misspeters. I can disagree with your approach without wishing a child to have an accident or suggest you're crap with kids.

It works for you and your group.

Just like my approach of 'default is no, but I exercise discretion and the result is no more than 3 kids on an average week needing to be out of class' works for me.

(I'd be interested to see how the children who can't wait 10 mins until the end of class manage when they queue at theme parks, or are in a traffic jam etc. I will always exercise discretion, but it does give food for thought if they could sit and watch an hour of telly but can't do the same time in class).

Just to clarify that should be kids who 'can't wait' 10 mins (no medical issue). Because I'm reasonably sure that when it's a hobby or interest kids can manage more than 10 mins without a medical issue. Yet somehow class has to be missed on demand.

Misspeters do you have children of your own?