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A Valentines disco? For Reception?????

254 replies

nearlythree · 25/01/2007 20:47

The school PTA have organised a Valentines disco - well, two in fact, one for 4-7 year olds and the other for the rest of the school. Apart from the fact that it finishes after dd1's bedtime, I am furious that the school thinks this is appropriate for such young children. I know that Michelle Elliot of Kidscape has spoken out about this trend and I am shocked that dd1's school aren't more clued up. Dh is backing me on this and wants me to see the head about it. Whatever happens dd1 won't be going.

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Hallgerda · 25/01/2007 20:53

I'm not terribly keen on the idea of discos at all for young children, but I would check, before getting unduly outraged, exactly what the Valentine's theme means. It could be as simple as having heart decorations around the hall. If they're actually encouraging the children into pairings, I agree that's off.

SherlockLGJ · 25/01/2007 20:55

So why not join the PTA and change from within ??

And what exactly are you outraged about

WigWamBam · 25/01/2007 21:00

It's a disco.

It happens to be done around Valentine's Day.

Children don't have the same ideas about Valentine's Day as we have. They just enjoy a good boogie.

It's a shame that the timing isn't better, but the younger children don't have to stay until the end.

FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:00

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FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:01

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FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:03

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SherlockLGJ · 25/01/2007 21:04

A fiver says it is on a Friday night, and will have minimum impact on your DD's bed time.

I do know that if I you went to see the head he would smile benignly at you, all the while maintaining a sensible visage.

Why isn't your DH going to the head ??

FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:05

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nearlythree · 25/01/2007 21:07

Hallgerda, I have no idea whether they will be paired off or not. It's the whole idea that makes me shudder.

Sherlock, dd1 is nearly five. An enchanted ball would be fine. So would a fancy dress party, or a teddy bears' pic-nic, or a good old-fashioned party with games and jelly and ice cream. But why a Valentines disco??? Fine for the older ones, but why this pressure to have grown-up things so young?

We are very careful about what dd1 is exposed to. We don't have MTV on, don't listen to the radio, don't watch cheap childrens' telly that is all about being famous. Having seen her friend wearing heels and trying to dance like Britney Spears, I'm glad. I know that eventually she will come across all these things, but I though it would be at friends' houses - not the school!

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motherinferior · 25/01/2007 21:08

They'll just dash around, dance a bit, hang out with their mates, come home.

SherlockLGJ · 25/01/2007 21:10

Valentine was a holy priest in Rome, who, with St. Marius and his family, assisted the martyrs in the persecution under Claudius II. He was apprehended, and sent by the emperor to the prefect of Rome, who, on finding all his promises to make him renounce his faith in effectual, commended him to be beaten with clubs, and afterwards, to be beheaded, which was executed on February 14, about the year 270. Pope Julius I is said to have built a church near Ponte Mole to he memory, which for a long time gave name to the gate now called Porta del Popolo, formerly, Porta Valetini. The greatest part of his relics are now in the church of St. Praxedes. His name is celebrated as that of an illustrious martyr in the sacramentary of St. Gregory, the Roman Missal of Thomasius, in the calendar of F. Fronto and that of Allatius, in Bede, Usuard, Ado, Notker and all other martyrologies on this day. To abolish the heathens lewd superstitious custom of boys drawing the names of girls, in honor of their goddess Februata Juno, on the fifteenth of this month, several zealous pastors substituted the names of saints in billets given on this day.

The Origin of St. Valentine
The origin of St. Valentine, and how many St. Valentines there were, remains a mystery. One opinion is that he was a Roman martyred for refusing to give up his Christian faith. Other historians hold that St. Valentine was a temple priest jailed for defiance during the reign of Claudius. Whoever he was, Valentine really existed because archaeologists have unearthed a Roman catacomb and an ancient church dedicated to Saint Valentine. In 496 AD Pope Gelasius marked February 14th as a celebration in honor of his martyrdom.

The first representation of Saint Valentine appeared in a The Nuremberg Chronicle, a great illustrated book printed in 1493. [Additional evidence that Valentine was a real person: archaeologists have unearthed a Roman catacomb and an ancient church dedicated to Saint Valentine.] Alongside a woodcut portrait of him, text states that Valentinus was a Roman priest martyred during the reign of Claudius the Goth [Claudius II]. Since he was caught marrying Christian couples and aiding any Christians who were being persecuted under Emperor Claudius in Rome [when helping them was considered a crime], Valentinus was arrested and imprisoned. Claudius took a liking to this prisoner until Valentinus made a strategic error: he tried to convert the Emperor whereupon this priest was condemned to death. He was beaten with clubs and stoned; when that didn't do it, he was beheaded outside the Flaminian Gate [circa 269].

Saints are not supposed to rest in peace; they're expected to keep busy: to perform miracles, to intercede. Being in jail or dead is no excuse for non-performance of the supernatural. One legend says, while awaiting his execution, Valentinus restored the sight of his jailer's blind daughter. Another legend says, on the eve of his death, he penned a farewell note to the jailer's daughter, signing it, "From your Valentine."

St. Valentine was a Priest, martyred in 269 at Rome and was buried on the Flaminian Way. He is the Patron Saint of affianced couples, bee keepers, engaged couples, epilepsy, fainting, greetings, happy marriages, love, lovers, plague, travellers, young people. He is represented in pictures with birds and roses.

FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:10

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nearlythree · 25/01/2007 21:13

No, I'm not cross b/c it's past her bedtime, although it's a bit dim of the school not to realise.

Dh will be looking after dd2 and ds. I am happy to deal with it.

I'm a big believer in rites of passage - when you reach this age, that is appropriate. My mum had me wearing make-up and heels at 7 and it wasn't clever, it just meant that as I got older I had nothing to look forward to as a way of being treated any more grown-up. So I just acted like the grown-up I wasn't.

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FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:15

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SherlockLGJ · 25/01/2007 21:17

Guess it depends on where you live really..

In DS's school, they are very aware of Valentine was, but then it is a Catholic school.

No little tarts at our disco's just little girls and little boys turned out by Gap and Boden.

Could it be a demographic thing ?

We don't have MTV on,......... I don't know anyone who does at our school.

don't listen to the radio,........... I will confess to Radio 2 and Terry Wogan.

Don' know which is worse, Radio 2 or the fact that I enjoy Wogan.

don't watch cheap childrens' telly that is all about being famous............ Beebies all the way in YR1 at our school, the really sophisticated ones get Scooby Doo at the weekend.

Having seen her friend wearing heels and trying to dance like Britney Spears, I'm glad. I am genuinely with you on this one, what sort of a school is it ??

marthamoo · 25/01/2007 21:17

From my experience of primary school Valentine's Day Discos - the hall will probably be decorated with hearts, they will play really cheesy disco music (Steps, S Club 7...yes, and Bob the Builder), the little girls will dance nicely together and the boys will rush about like lunatics pretending to be aeroplanes til their hair is plastered to their heads. Valentine's Day is just a handy hook to hang a fund raiser on.

If you don't want her to go, don't send her - but it's hardly Sodom and Gomorrah, I promise.

And, fwiw, our PTA had several parental objections to the Hallowe'en disco - that the theme was not suitable for children. As a friendly and amenable PTA, we changed it to an "Autumn Disco" - that's what was on the posters and flyers; that's what we called it. I helped set up the hall for it and listened as a year 2 class came through "oooh it's the Hallowe'en disco!" - their teacher: "yes, it's the Autumn disco"..."Hallowe'en disco! Yayy!"

Even if you call it something else, it will remain a Valentine's Disco to the children - they're not easily dissuaded.

FluffyMummy123 · 25/01/2007 21:18

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batters · 25/01/2007 21:19

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SherlockLGJ · 25/01/2007 21:20

Ah..........so it goes deeper than the PTA organising a space for reception to run around like loons and do the Macarane[sp]

Your mother is not everyones mother and it is unfair to tar everyone with the same brush. IMO

nearlythree · 25/01/2007 21:25

The school is a small village school, 90 pupils. We don't make a thing of Valentine's day at home so dd1 won't have a clue. I have no idea where her friend got her Britney act from but I think what really shocked me was her mum clapping her and saying how great her dancing was...a lot of dd1's friends watch Jetix.

It just seems so unnecessary when there are alternatives.

Cod, it finishes about dd1's bedtime but she doesn't turn into a pumpkin if up later and for treats and special occasions she stays up.

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batters · 25/01/2007 21:29

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wotzsaname · 25/01/2007 21:30

The girls giggle an do some dancing and the boys race around or run and slide on their knees and show off. Continues like that through life.
FWIW let her go, if she wants to, she realy wont care what its called, and may question why you dont want her to have the same fun as others in her class. She doesnt have to get all dressed up, trainers and tshirt will do.

I am sorry you were made to grow up early, but she doesnt have to wear high heels and make and and from experience finding out some of thier class mates do this, has put my 2 dds off the whole bratz look.

agree with WigWam

nearlythree · 25/01/2007 21:31

Hang on, Sherlock, you know nothing about my mother. Tarred with what brush exactly? I just know from experience that pushing kids to grow up too soon isn't sensible. I think our society is very different from the one I grew up in and as parents we are a lot more clued-up about the signals we give our children...society had changed so much between my childhood and my adolecence in a way my mother could never have forseen - I think she was very naive - but we aren't, are we?

As for being on the PTA, I have three children under five and for the past week I've been in bed by half eight some nights. Chance would be a fine thing.

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batters · 25/01/2007 21:35

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batters · 25/01/2007 21:35

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