To write letter to request DS has a particular teacher when he starts reception in September

[BingBong36]

I have another son that is in year 1 now and I really disliked his reception teacher for various reasons (so did he). She has a very stern approach, there is a job share and at parents evening they totally spoke over each other etc and I just didn't warm to her. My youngest son is very sensitive summer boy and I really love the other reception teacher and feel he is best in her class.

I am going to write to the school to request this but how do I word it?

Thanks

Despite the complications of allowing all the parents to pick their child's teacher it looks like the school has already opened the floodgate if "The thought only entered my head when a few mums did exactly the same and the school were fine about it." (my emphasis). If its OK for them and its OK for OP it must be thrown open to every parent for fairness sake surely? Thank goodness I don't have to sort those class-lists!

Chocolate there will be a lot of children who will be totally fine placed in either class. There will be a small handful who need something different to succeed/blossom and that's fine because schools need to differentiate.

Various how do the parents make their contributions though? It's one thing to say 'my ds is very quiet and needs a gentle approach or 'my dd is a live wire and needs a firm hand'. It's another to say 'I wish to choose Mrs x over Mrs y because (insert random reason) ". How would the majority of parents know anything about the teachers other than through play ground gossip?

Imagine if one class had all the confident, outgoing, older children who get on just fine with any teacher.

Then the other has all the sensitive, cry at the drop of a hat, cuddly and 'babyish' children.

It just wouldn't work - classes need a balanced mix of all personalities, and for parents to have the trust that the teacher knows what she's doing.

TheRainintheWoods it is nothing to do with HTs professionalism more about the playground gossip

It's also perfectly reasonable for the head to say I know my staff and my decision is based on professional judgement

I very much hope that OP has no idea via school if the requests were "successful" or just coincidental.

I mean the staff mrz . I'd assume the op would have the sense not to discuss this with other parents. She'd be less likely to succeed in her request if she did because if this teacher is as unpopular as she makes out, they'll all be at it.

Well, not wanting to be that parents, I didn't write the letter....my DSs had both had the same fantastic Reception teacher, but I would have been equally happy if they'd had the parallel one.

Then, DD was allocated the other class. Not only was she not to have the lovely teacher my DSs had ,she was to have much, much worse (won't go into it now) To cut a long story short, we were told even if a place came up in the other class, DD would not be moved.

We changed school, also moving DS2 who was going into Y2.

OP, if you are going to say something, say it before children are allocated classes. You have nothing to lose. Maybe not ask for a particular teacher, but meet with the HT and say your DS is particularly sensitive, you have concerns.

Also, the Reception teachers might not be teaching reception next year....they may move to other years or schools!

Good luck

That's also assuming that the OP has never ever moaned to another parent at any time in the past TheRainInTheWoods ... Playground rumours don't need any facts

Perhaps teachers would want to select the children they teach based on the perceived amiability of the parents!

True mrz !

According to my pupils (I work at a k3/4 pru) I'm rich and live in a massive house. Hahaha.

I do not do play ground gossip and I have not heard anyone gossip about this sort of thing either, it's hardly juicy is it!

You don't have to do playground gossip ...others will do it for you

And yes it would be very juicy for some

Quite the reverse Bingo, this is EXACTLY the sort of thing I hear in the playground when picking up my children. Almost always as well these parents are the ones that are vocal about how they perceive the teachers to be based on firstly the five minutes a day they see them for drop off/pick up and then the five minutes every other payday the teacher has had to spend listening to them moan about how they feel little Jimmy/Mollie are hard done to.

Mrz are you saying me having a chat to the head teacher she will then tell the school mums?

As mentioned (if you read all of my posts) a few mums did the same and there is no gossip going around, we are not talking about them, far more important things to talk about, no one is bothered!! Not sure what school you are used to .

Why is it juicy? Oh mrs bing asked if jonny can go in to mrs x's class. Errr really??? That's juicy for some? To be honest I don't give a crap if people wanted to discuss it, but sad if they did!! Is that what your like then? Sounds like it.

Ok, OP, you didn't respond to my advice so I'll repeat it - whatever the outcome of your chat with the HT, make sure you work hard on building up your DS's resilience. Without it he will fall at every hurdle, especially if he picks up your anxiety about situations that haven't even happened yet.

CandOdad. Your post is irrelevant to my situation. I don't gossip, I don't moan about the teachers, I just want my son to go in to another's teacher's class.

I'm lucky my school is not gossipy and not am I.

Thanks to those who have made helpful contributions x

Suburban Rhonda, sorry there are so many posts I can't keep up with them all esp reading on a mobile.

My son will not pick up on my anxiety I don't show that to him, he is only 3.

a few mums did the same and there is no gossip going around

Yet, you have heard them talking and on the back of what they said-have decided to write a letter to the Headteacher requesting a move.

What's to say that this would not escalate around the playground!?

Perhaps next May, one of those 'few mums' has a younger child and they mention to another mum with a 4 year old who is currently at nursery that the school's Reception teachers are Mrs Nice and Mrs Horrid. The mum is horrified and a growing group of them discuss how awful it would be to get Mrs Horrid. 'But, it's ok, says one of the 'few mums! I went and asked and they didn't put my Jimmy in with Mrs Horrid-just go and talk to the head!'

'Right-I'm going to ring the head', say the group of mums-'I'm not having my precious Tom, Richard or Harriet being taught by Mrs Scary!'. They then tell other mums with children starting that school that they already know from Tumble Tots, NCT classes, work etc that there's a dead scary Reception teacher, but you can ring and ask not to get her...

That's the sort of gossip that happens.

Your son might be better off with Miss Stern. Sometimes we need to think about what a child needs and sometimes that is to teach independence rather than submit to clinginess. As parents we are not always best places to show children tough love and teachers are perfectly placed because the view of the child is clear eyed.

The said mum wanted mrs stern!!!

And said mum is a friend of mine anyway from before school started.