What time does your child go to sleep on a school night?

[MyChildDoesntNeedSleep]

My son is 9 and apparently the only one in his class who goes to sleep before 10pm on a school night. On weekends 'everybody else' stays up until midnight.

In an ideal world I would like to see him in bed by 8pm on a school night. He takes ages to drop off to sleep (I mean when you tell him he can read for half an hour in bed and forget to go up to turn off his light he's still reading when you go upstairs to go to the loo at 10pm .)Most nights its usually lights off by 8.30pm.

My 6 year old is in bed by 8pm on a good night. Quite often it's 8.15-8.30 as I find it hard juggling the two bed times and he keeps getting out of bed and I basically need to get more organised. Ideally I would like to see him in bed by 7.30.

Could we have a school night bedtime roll call?

Just put your child's age and bedtime.

I want to show my 9 year old this thread so he can believe me that the ones who say they go to bed at 10pm are probably not telling the truth........

Kitesurfgirl
DD (13) only finishes her extra grade 5 ballet exam lesson at 8.15pm on a Wednesday
should I put her to bed without supper?

or would you like to put an age range on your sweeping Key Stage 1 style statement?!

Quite a range isn't there :)

I think in bed at 8 and lights out at 8.30 for a 9 year old is plenty late enough in the week.

A child waking up without needing to be woken doesn't mean they've had enough sleep - it just means their body clock knows it's getting up time.

That 'EverybodyElse' has been a pain in the backside since Adam was a boy!

Interestingly ds today reported his teacher told them they snould be in bed by 730 lastest (year 3). If I put ds to bed before 8 ,he wakes before 6, so not likely to happen. He goes to bed 815 lights out 845. Wakes naturally between 615 and 7. Horses for courses surely. Dd (5) loves her sleep and I would absolutely agree she needs to be in bed by 8 idealy 745 on a school night.

should obviously

dd 7 between 7 and 7 30 asleep
dt's 7 pm . asleep
ALL up at 6 no matter what time I put them to bed !

DS age 4 (in bed 7pm ish) asleep 7.45pm

(He is awake at 6.30am to eat breakfast and leave for school)

Getting children to bed at the same time doesn't make a lot of sense, it is clear from this thread that lots of children of the same age have different amounts of sleep and function perfectly well.
I work some evenings and would not be happy if I had be woken up at 6am by a child who had gone to bed at 7pm. I don't get up until 7:30 and that's when the day starts, bedtime in our house fits in with my working hours.
If the 9 year olds referred to by the OP are the type who need 9.5 hours then going to sleep at 10 would be fine if they could get up again at 7:30 and that would work for school times. It depends on the children's sleep requirements, each parent has said the sleep required by children varies according to the individual child regardless of age.

DD (8) 8pm
DS2 (12) 9pm
DS1 (18) Whenever...

All, including the 18 year old who is just finishing school, have to be up at 7am. The only one I have to wake up is the 18yo, the others are usually awake and reading at 7.

DD (4yo) - 7pm, story and lights out and asleep by 7:30pm. She has just started reception and is full time from this week onwards (eeek)!

Both LO's are bathed 6-6:30 so are ready for bed by 7pm. DS (4mo) stays downstairs until 7:30, then has a bf and is in his cot by 8pm. I cannot get them to bed together just yet - they'd keep eachother awake until midnight!

Just to add DD is awake for the day by 7am at the latest, so she has anywhere between 11 and 11.5hrs sleep a night.

Well kitesurf - I am also an (ex) teacher and now a TA, and it is impossible to set a deadline for bedtime for all children as all children are different and have different sleep requirements.

My 9y does not need to be in bed nor asleep by 8pm. She does not need 11 hours+ sleep a night.She hasn't done for over a year. So, although DD may go to bed a little after this and is rarely asleep before 9pm she is in no way sleep deprived, has no tiredness side effects during the day, etc.

And I am not a "soft mum" either over this - btw do dads not come into this?

Now obviously if a child is tired during the day, esp littler ones, then it may be that an earlier bedtime is needed - but this obsession with set bedtimes is not always needed you know. Most parents are good parents and can make decisions for their own child.

FWIWI work in a Y1 class and out of the thirty children I'd say there are maybe 2, poss 3, I can think of who get tired and look like they'd benefit from more night time sleep. the rest seem just fine, so their parents - please note parents, not just mum! - must be getting soemthing right.

8 and 10 year old here.

Theory is that both have lights off at 8.30 pm every school night, going up at 7.45 for bath and books. Both are woken at 7 am to leave the house at 7.15 to go to CM for breakfast

However, ballet for DD doesn't finish till 8.30 on one night a week, and Cubs till 8. Scouts for DS doesn't finish till 8.45 - so however much I might like to enforce 8.30 pm every night I can't. More of DD's 6-7 hours of dance a week will be in the later evenings as she gets older - so I imagine when she is DS's age she might well have 2 or 3 later nights each week.

Left to themselves, DS is a 'go to bed at 8, wake at 6' type, DD is a 'go to bed at 9.30, wake up at 8' type. They have always had different body clocks - one lark, one owl.

9 - 7.30
11 - 8.00

(except for one/two nights they are at activities)

DS aged 4.5. In bed at 7, stories, lights out at 7.30.

At weekends 8.30ish.

Well you might guess from my nickname that sleep isn't a skill any of mine have aquired!
Dd1-6.5 goes up by 7:30, asleep usually by 9 or 9.30, but sometimes as late as 10; up at 6:30/7am
Dd2-4.5 goes up by 7:30, asleep usually within 10 mins but up by 6 (yawn)
Ds - nearly 2; goes up by 7:30 but oft not asleep until 8:30, up again by 6, he does sleep in morning, but if he doesn't will fall asleep on school run and then be up until 11pm.
It has been known for us to tell dd1 and ds for that matter that all the lights are going off because we are going to bed. The annoying thing is they always wake bright and breezy as I yawn through the day!

Anniemac my DS is almost 7 and he is similar to your DD, doesn't ever sleep 12 hours, closer to 10 - 10.5. I have noticed a lot of people have posted bedtimes, but not the times the children are back up so it is quite difficult to gauge the average sleep.
On the sleep guides I have checked 10-11 hours is given for a 6 year so 10.5 hours would be good.
I know what you mean about the early bed thing, there is a kind of societal pressure to put children to bed early. There must be a real need for school age children to rise very early - luckily for me we don't share that need. ZZZZ

If your kids aren't getting to bed until past 9pm...when on earth are you guys getting 'adult' time?! Of course all kids different, yes, I was talking about Dad's too, was just writing mum's to be quicker. Finally, lady who thought I was suggesting you send child to sleep without 'supper'...erm...isn't 'dinner' at 6pm enough these days?! No wonder we have a problem with childhood obesity ho hum tongue in cheek
Seriously guys tho, surely you would ALL benefit from your kids being in bed much earlier. 9pm is a bedtime for secondary school kids, not primary!

Ouch!
I would love DD2 to be asleep by 9pm (she is 9).
BUT..... She has never been much of a sleeper. It was only last year she started sleeping through the night. Imagine 8 years and not a full nights sleep. Absolutely soul destroying.... For me.

I am not a bad parent. She is the youngest of 3. The others slept. She doesn't and is often still awake when we go to bed.

We have tried everything. However there are no side effects for her. She is lively, wide awake and a million miles an hour all day. Up at 7.20 every morning and is perfectly fine with 8 1/2 hours sleep a night. In fact I have just heard her go to the bathroom now 10.35!

In contrast, my friend with DCs 11 &9 has them in bed by 7.30 and has been known to put the clock forward an hour and tell them it's bedtime ( when it's really 6.30) and they go to sleep. Now her DCs are like zombies the next day if they've been up til 9pm.

I can't remember reading about children's bedtimes revolving around adult time, shouldn't it relate to the child's age and sleep requirements?
Are you being serious Kitesurf?
I think you should read the thread again, different children have different sleep requirements, different ages have differing sleep requirements they get up at different times. Why not say all children should wear size 10 shoes' regardless of the size of their feet.

9 year old twins - don't need sleep either.

Bed at 8.30pm supposed to be asleep by 9pm but it's usually nearer 10pm. They are just wide awake.

Up at 7.20am.

Drives me bonkers as I want my evenings! I'm always up till midnight though so I guess I do get my time.

Thank goodness its not just me!

We were still doing homework at 8.45 tonight because DD didn't get in from choir til 8pm. So it's not as if we don't try and wear her out.

Anniemac- don't beat yourself up.
If your children cope with the amount of sleep they have it's fine.
As a working mum you appreciate that extra time to spend with them. Not everyone is so keen to "get rid of them" so they can spend one to one time as adults.