23 weeks pregnant found out father is married

[Soconfusedandsadx]

NC for this but I've been on mumsnet a while.
I'm completely heartbroken.
I had no idea.
I am 22 weeks pregnant and received a message last week from my partner's wife!! Someone messaged her and told her her husband is having an affair and all about me.

He admitted it all and has chosen her. We weren't living together but we do work together and I was really happy being part of a couple. We spend lots of time together. I am in love with him and he says he is with me.
Turns out he is still married. He told me he was separated. 😢
I don't think I can continue my pregnancy alone. And the baby will be a reminder of what I have done and what he is.
I can have an abortion this week but I am on the cusp. I have been to Marie Stopes and had my initial consultation. I know the baby's sex and I have chosen a name. I can feel the baby moving.

I don't think there is an easy answer to this but I don't think I can have this child.
I am so angry and so sad and just feeling so stupid. I don't know what to do.
Please no horrible comments. I'm broken.
How can I have this child in this situation? I am already a single mum to three children from my now ended marriage.
I can't stop crying. I can't see a way out. I don't want to abort but mentally I am not strong enough to carry on with this pregnancy now. I don't think mentally i am strong enough to abort.

I was meant to have my abortion prep today and my surgery tomorrow but I've caught covid from my kids and they cancelled my appointment so now it's Thursday for my prep and Friday for surgery.
I'm under the care of my GP and I am also scheduled to see the perinatal mental health team next week as I have long standing mental health problems.
I've got to put my three children and myself ahead of this baby but I feel broken.
If you've got this far thank you for reading. I'm not sure if I have even posted this in the right section. Please feel free to report and ask to move if so. Thank you.

Oh what a precious picture, I’m so happy for you! Many many congratulations and well done xx

Congratulations and well done op, you're amazing xx your journey has been so tough but you got there in the end. Be so so proud, I am xx
Welcome to the world baby Sophie ❤️❤️

Thank you everyone.
Baby is now 12 days old and she is doing so well.
She was weighed yesterday by the midwife and is now 7lb 7oz!
She ended up in special care for 3 days and nights. We came home last Tuesday after a social services discharge meeting.
She is a fairly decent sleeper atm, but I know this can change at the drop of a hat! My three older children adore her.
I still have very upset and teary days when I feel sad about her father. I've not even told him she is here.
I am getting lots of support from all the external agencies, my mum has been staying with me also xx

Delighted to read your update, @Soconfusedandsadx , I was thinking about you yesterday and wondering how you were all getting on.
My three older children adore her. This is the bit that really makes me smile. And quite sure that all is going to be well. Very best wishes to you all and a big virtual hug. 💞

I don’t know you, but I’m so proud of you!! You are so strong and amazing and all your children are very lucky !!!

Lovely to hear your update

You are such an amazing person and all your children are just so lucky to have you

Thanks for the update @Soconfusedandsadx , it’s lovely to hear that baby is thriving and that your other children are so happy with her . As for the other , I wouldn’t tell him I’d just contact the CMS and let them do the honours . Best wishes 💐

So pleased to hear from you and that little Sophie is in the care of her loving family. You’ve done so well. There’s bound to be emotional ups and downs with everything that’s happened combined with postnatal hormones, but look how far you’ve come. It’s amazing, it’s a happy ending and you made it happen.

Awh congratulations. Glad your all doing well. 💐.

Hi op unfortunately only just read your thread I have read it all and I can honestly say I would off understud if you didn't continue with the pregnancy but I promise you I was so happy when you decided to keep her I understand its not easy I was a single mother to 5 children age ranging from 14 to 1 years they are all grown up and left home I have 2 more children 9 and 4 and 6 grandchildren out of my 7 children I have 2 boys oldest 23 youngest 9 so I understand why your son wanted a baby brother being surrounded by girls ain't much fun 😄op I want to say a massive well done

Glad to hear your little girl is doing well. Hope she continues being a good sleeper.

It’s been lo lovely to read your updates OP. I’ve been rooting for you all along and have been so impressed by the strength of character you have shown in dealing with the unforeseen difficult circumstances surrounding your pregnancy.

You have made it, she is here, and what happens going forward you can shape yourself. Enjoy being Sophie’s Mummy and be as good to yourself as you possibly can 💐

Thank you everyone. 💛
I adore my baby daughter and I am so happy she is here. She makes me smile every day. Right now she is chilled out and doesn't cry but I know this is early days!!
I know mumsnet gets some flack but I can honestly say you have all been amazing with your advice and your kind words and support, all for a very confused and depressed stranger on the Internet.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart xxx

Thank you so much are for taking time to let us know how you are all doing xx

So glad to hear all is going well!

Totally delighted to know that it's all going well OP. She brought the light with her. Bless her little heart, and yours, and your other children's. 💞

I’m so pleased it’s going so well and that you’ve bonded with her so well and that you are feeling so much better yourself xx💐

Aww this is so lovely! Thank you for updating us, we're all still here for you x

It brought tears to my eyes reading your last post!

I am so happy for you, baby and your other children. ❤

Bless you, glad it's going so well 💖

What lovely update! I’m so glad things are going well for you all.

It’s been wonderful to hear your updates recently. Agree with the other ladies we are all still here, so keep the thread open or do a follow on if you need.

You are so deserving of all the support and of your beautiful baby daughter. So pleased you are enjoying this time with her. Xo

Wonderful to hear. You should be so proud of yourself for finding your way through to where you are now ❤️
It not finding things easy, but finding them really hard and doing them anyway that shows real bravery and strength x

Such a happy update thank you for letting us know how you are.

Such an amazing update op - well done and keep going ! Xx