Pregnant again! - I'm happy, but DH not!

[baggybear]

Hi! I haven't been on for a while but I need somebody to chat to who is impartial!

I've just found out I'm pregnant with #4. I'm happy but my DH isn't. Not really sure what to do. I does love me, I know that and he has told me. That is why this is so hard for him. I feel as though I've got to keep any symptoms quiet (just starting to get a bit of morning sickness)so its not in his face. I know he'll come round in the end, but I need some friendly words from somebody.

But he can only play the shock card for so long. I mean he has been aware of the situation since Saturday and he gets more thinking time than me (he has a 2 hour journey to work ever night, and the same home) and he's away from the situation. I don't want to sound as though I'm hard done by, but with kids off school I don't get much time to myself to think about how things are.

I know it will take a while for him to get used too it, but surely its not a shock anymore.

I can understand you worrying about the bleeding. I was always checking for bleeding with both of my pregnancies & insisted on an early scan both times, just to be sure!
However, I think a little bleeding is very common & can happen around the time your period is due.
It is only if there is lots of bleeding combined with stomach cramps that there is real cause for concern.
Just continue to take it easy!

Men are funny creatures BB!
They do tend to dwell in their own self pity for longer than us.
He will come through it soon, I am confident of that from the things he is saying already.

Thanks Blueted! Can't wait to see you later and give you a big hug! I've got to go now coz DS2 is opening more pressies from mum! see you later! xx

Hope things work out Baggybear - have just read the whole thread!
He sounds like a lovely DH deep down and i am sure he will come round

Thanks Tessiebear. He really is a lovely DH and I love him SOOOOOOOOOOO much. We are truely soulmates. All will work out in the end.

Going to enjoy this pregnancy from now on. It is definately my last so will savour every moment - morning sickness and all!

Blueted - Told M-I-L tonight! She's thrilled and can't understand why DH isn't over the moon! Just DH's dad to tell tomorrow and thats it done. Still not going to make it common knowledge to the rest of the world just yet. Waiting for DH to get his head round it a bit more. Thanks for letting me bend your ear about this. You are a good friend I can start bending your other ear now about morning sickness, stretchmarks, cramp etc, etc!!!!

Enjoy it Baggybear. I have just given birth to DS3 (2 weeks ago) and he was deffinately my last (i think!!!)
After DS2 i didnt feel like i had finished doing the whole pregnancy thing. This time i feel like i have got "closure" IYKWIM
DS3's was the best birth, although i cant claim to have enjoyed the morning sickness whilst looking after 2 other boys!!!
I am sure your DH will be overcome with love for him / her and end up feeling guilty about how he felt at the beginning.
I was hoping for a DD this time and when i found out it was another DS i felt slightly dissapointed. Now i feel SOOOOOO guilty for feeling like that as it was obviously "meant to be"
You were obviously meant to have 4 children - if it hadnt happened this month it would have happened eventually wouldnt it??

Glad it went well telling MIL BB!
I am sure DH will be happy about it all soon enough. He seems to be coming round a little more each day & it is still very early days isn't it?!
Feel free to bend my ears about anything, anytime!!!

HI! I know its late, but is anybody there?????

I am here!
How are you doing?

You ok Babbybear?

Yeah, soory, i'm here!

I'm good as far as DH is concerned. MIL phoned him today whilst i was out, and gave him a real telling off for being so miserabe. I think she gave him a kick up the a**e, and he seems okay today. We actually talking about baby !!

We've also talked about having a loft conversion and what car will should get! WOW, what a turn around!!

But as 1 worry fades, another comes along. Just been reading a thread on eptopic pregs and got a bit scared as I am having a lot of pain. Its not really bad, not to the point where i have to stop what i'm doing or anything like that, but i'm aware of a dull ache which very rarely goes away. Really worried now.

I am glad things are getting sorted with your DH.
I am sure the pain is just the normal stretching type pain you get in early pregnancy, but if you are worried how about giving your surgery a ring & making an appt to see your gp?

They will probably book you in for an early scan, to reassure you.

Might ring M/W friend tomorrow.

Bugger, why do I worry so much when i'm pregnant?!? Hormones have a lot to answer for! I don't think I can function with out something to keep my mind ticking over. Got this camping trip starting tomorrow, and i am still worried bout that coz its on a working farm (concern over animals and poo and germs and stuff!!) AARRRGGGHHHHH!!!! I'm going out of my little mind now!!!!!!

Chill out BB! Everything will be fine!
Good idea to ring MW friend tomorrow for reassurance though.

Right...ahhh, chilling now...i'm off to my bed now. got lots to do tomorrow morning for this trip. Still got to pack clothes. Wish me luck and think of me sleeping beneath the stars... and over the earwigs and slugs and spiders eeeerrrrrrrr!!!!!!!

Love to your DS's. Night night. XXXXX

Good luck BB! Hope you have a great time!
Take it easy though won't you?
Night.xxx

Morning Blueteddy! How are you today?

I got a really good nights sleep last night. Joe slept in his own bed ALL night, so i have woken feeling refreshed and raring to go (well, maybe not!) The pain I was getting has gone for the time being, which is good. Not looking forward to this weekend, though, but will get through it i'm sure. You will think of me, won't you?!?

I've got loads to do today so might not get a chance to log on again but will be back Sunday, so might speak to you then.

Have a great weekend. Oh, when do you move??

Good morning BB!
Glad to hear you are feeling better this morning!
Don't read anymore things that will lead to you worrying, right!!!
Enjoy your little adventure & remember to try & relax & not run around too much!
I will be thinking about you.
Move is next Friday & I am not organized at all!!!
Think I am in denial that it is all happening so soon!
Hope you all have a great time!

Hi-ya! Back from our camping trip now. Bloody hated every minute!! Will tell you details when i see you next.

So looking forward to sleeping in my own bed tonight! And being able to go to the loo in the middle of the night with out having to cross a field!

Hope tyou are all well and good. If you are on later will chat then. Must go and feed the kids - been living on beans for 3 days!!!!

I haven't time to read all this thread, but my feeling is that he's probably being 'male', and worrying about the practical things, like providing for a larger than average family. I'm sure he will relax as time goes on.

Ahh, thanks Smellymelly. DH is coming round already. I think he realises how much I want this and how happy i am. So things are settling down in our house. Thanks for your kind words though - they are much appriciated. Are you expecting/how many kiddy-winks do you have?

Baggybear, I just wanted to congratulate you and say that I know a few people from families of 4 and they all think it's a very good number to be part of! My dh would like 4 but we're not that far along yet - just tested positive for #2. Perhaps I'll see you on a 'due in' thread! Congratulations. lovely babies!

CONGRATULATIONS Spots !! When are you due????

I think 4 is a great number to have. When i meet people who are thinking of having a third i tell them to either stick at 2 or consider 4 because I think 3 is quite difficult. DS3 (who's 2) gets left out a lot by his older brothers (who are 5 & 6 and very close in age and friendship). Having a 4th gives DS3 an ally! I can't wait to have my big family. I am from an average family - myself and 1 brother - so a big family really appeals to me.