Boy/Girl!!!

[AnotherHelen]

Im growing more and more worried about how i might react to the sex of my baby! i hate that im even writing this as there are far more important things than this, but, i have 2 boys already and my sister has a son also, she recently gave birth to a girl and now she and my mum and partner are worried that i may be very dissapointed if i get another boy, i am a very maternal person and there's no way i could ever look at any of my babies and feel disapointed!! but what if they are right? what if when he/she is born and they say its a boy, how will that feel? id hate to think i could EVER feel dissapointed about a baby, has anyone been in this situation? how did it work out?
Helen 28+1 xxxxx

Awww! - Mamatoto, that is soo sweet! i think i will be the same! if it is a boy i will only feel a little dissapointed for a little while! i would never feel really upset and reject baby in anyway becasue of it as its just something i could never do (infact i cant believe anyone could?!) im just being a child really by wanting to buy pink things and do the flowery barbie stuff!! I LOVE my boys and i would love another as equally i know! i will try and stop flapping about it, as its really rather quite pointless!

Really redhelen? its abit bizarre isnt it! i think my desire to call her she and buy pink is overwhelming - my dp truly believs im just wishful thinking but i cant believe i would be like that! i feel this baby is 'girlie' i cant describe it - well you will al know what i mean! i really really feel like this baby is a girl - i will be very shocked if its not, although if it is a girl and im right that will freak me out abit too! xxx

We didn't find the sex out with either of our children. When i was pregnant with my son we could agree on a boys name & not a girls...we had ds! The 2nd time we could agree on a girls & not a boys name...we had dd.

Maybe natures way of telling us something??

i hope your right coldtea coz we can onyl agree on a boys name right now, yet we couldnt agree on a boys name last time

just for fun!

Worked for both of mine.

it says girl for this one.... it was right for jess.

tried it before and kept praying it would say boy but NO!

I had a girl, then 2 boys, then when pregnant again really wanted to have a girl to even things up. In labour I was saying, 'Oooooh! I think SHE's stuck'. HE wasn't. That was 6 months ago. I would've loved a girl to even things up but equally I wouldn't swop my wee boy for anything. You'll be in love with whoever comes along.

When I was planning a family I just took it for granted I would a girl. When ds1 was born I fell in love with him straight away, but new I would have another baby to get my girl.

With ds2 I found out at scan, as thought I needed to prepare. Truth is I was 100% sure he was a girl. All my symptoms were different and chart said so etc. I honestly had to try so hard not to cry when we found out and completely hated myself for it as really I should have been relieved he was healthy. The worst thing was everyone knew I wanted a girl. Now he is here I love him to bits obvioulsy.

We only ever wanted 2 children and now I have that dilema about whether to go for a third. I am sure I read somewhere that if you have 2 boys your third is more than probably going to be a third too. The issues are would I be disapointed with another boy and I desperately don't want ds2 to feel 'unwanted'. I wonder if anyone has ever regeretted having a another and getting the 'wrong sex'.

What makes it harder is all my friends at the moment are having girls and I have got weepy about it. To be truthful most people don't understand.

Anyway sorry to waffle. I love my boys to bits but maybe that feeling of wanting a girl will never go away?

Oops I meant if you have 2 boys a thirs will probably be another boy!

Another helen - have you tried coldteas gender chart?

just tried the gender chart. Concieved January at age 33 and it predicts a girl. I asked the sex at my 20 week scan and was told girl (well she was 90% sure). This has made me feel even more hopeful that the scan was right

Hiya.

can sypathise as I have three boys (all girls on the Chinese calendar). With the first irt was great as I am one of three girls, the second was a bit oh well, the third...

well, we decided to have a gender scan. A few weeks before though the double test came back as high risk downs. We didn't want amnio as with two others resting just wouldnt happen, and I knew I would want my baby anyhow. We agreed to an extra detailed scan, and that was the same as the gender scan. So by the time Harry was a boy, all I cared about was that he had no Downs markers (and didnt have the syndrome at birth either).

I guess it was a persepctive thing.

Two years later, my sisters also have a boy each (dh's brother has yet to even leave home, let alone get a girlfriend, even though he is 30). We always planned to have 4 and may yet, but our eldest has Aspergers and the middle has hearing probs, so we'll see. A girl would be nice, but I learned my lesson last time!!

That gender chart says that ds1 should have been a girl!
Also, how do the gender charts account for boy/girl twins???

is that so muppety about if u have 2 boys more likely to get boy?

I have heard that if your first 2 children are of the same sex, you have a 75% chance of having the same sex again with your 3rd.
Don't know how true this statistic is.

That's probably right, but if it's true that there are factors that influence conception of a boy / girl, then aren't they more likely to have remained constant the longer (and more kids) they've been in placE?

I heard that the older you are the more likely you are to have a girl, maybe i'll wait a decade until I am 42!

Yes blue teddy thats what I read. It makes sense and I also heard that it was even more so for boys.

The chinese charts were wrong for me as were all the other quizzes which all had me having a girl!

You are right Peachyclair it is all about perspective. The thing is thats what makes it harder. I feel such a horrible person for wanting a girl. Its so hard to explain. I think I see boys and girls as totally different things in a way. Almost like cats and dogs and I imagine the expereince of bringing up a girl to be different. Maybe I am wrong? If I had 2 girls I honestly have no idea whether I would be having this conversation the other way round.

gender chart got it worng last time, this time it's saying girl but I have a feeling this one's a boy.

practically from the moment I conceived DD I knew she was a girl, I never looked at anything blue or boys names. If the sonographer had said boy I would have fallen off the table.

I always wanted a little girl, with number 2 I can honestly say I don't care, I will be delighted with another girl or a little boy.

We've decided we would like 3 children and ideally I would like another girl and a boy but 2 boys or 3 girls would be great.

I have a friend who lost a baby 3 days after she was born and for me being blessed with a healthy baby is enough I don't care about the sex.

I have to say muppety, that I would not advise trying for another baby unless you are 100% sure that you would be happy with either sex.
At the end of the day you cannot send a baby back because it is the wrong kind & you really have to be sure that you really want another baby & not just a certain sex child, as you could end up seriously dissapointed if it turns out to be another boy & could lead to big bonding problems between yourself & your new baby.
Sorry to be harsh!

dinasour i am the same.

Hate when people say "shame" bet you wanted a girl

Well in actual fact I WANTED boys and am extremly happy

I have two boys and am 37 weeks pg with #3. I always wanted three children - I would love a little girl for #3, but am 90% sure #3 is a little boy. Three boys will also be fabulous and I can't help thinking that to have a child to 'try for a particular sex' will, in half the cases, lead to a level of disappointment! You really get what you are given and very little, if anything, can really influence that. I think I was supposed to be a mummy to boys and I am just thrilled that I have been able to conceive the three children I really wanted so easily!! My boys are adorable.

...oh and someone asked me last week (when I was out with my two little lads) if I knew the sex of #3. I said I thought boy and their exact words "...oh well, never mind - you could always try again". Eh? Did I win the booby prize? Daft.

I know what you mean mommyd!! most people say to me 'what if you get another boy!!!!' - well then i will love him and spoil him rotten like his brothers! - it does kind of make you fell like you got a bum deal! i have done coldtea's gender chart and its right for my first two boys and this time it says a girl!! [trying to not raise my hopes] does anyone think that genetics could play a part at all?? as i have a very large family of mainly girls! and most of my sister cousins aunts have had 5-6 kids each and i have to say for as long as we can look back, we have only produced girls!! there is about 1 boy born to every 8/9 girls usually! (on my dp's side also - to a lesser extreme!) i am the ONLY one to produce 2 boys! i have also heard that if you have 2 children of the same sex then the third is also likely to be that sex also, but then i think maybe genetics could play a part too? - its like some kind of game of odds!!! - who'll win?? xxxx

Totally sympathise with your feelings, AnotherHelen.
I also have 2 boys and am 29+4 wks with 3rd. I decided to find out sex this time (hadn't before) as wanted to be prepared if it's another boy. They THINK it's a girl, but I really won't believe it until I see it, and actually it has made me realise that I'm less bothered than I thought, as long as it's healthy. My friend had her 4th boy and found out at the scan. She was momentarily disappointed, but said it helped a lot when people kept saying 'I bet you're hoping for a girl this time' to be able to say 'actually we know it's a boy'.
Have just re read post and don't know that I have really helped you!! I would say that a LOT of people I know with 3 have 2 of same sex, then 3rd is different, so there may be hope!!!!!!!