A gentle thread for those starting again after a difficult pregnancy, miscarriage etc.

[woollyjo]

I've just discovered I am 5.5 weeks pregnant.

In the last 2 years I have had 2 mcs and our dd2 was stillborn at term.

So I don't feel like I fit into the antenatal threads, and don't want to frighten anyone with my experiences.

Anyone else out there who needs a gentle thread?

Hi all,

great to see so many new names, hope this thread will help you get through the next few months.

I didn't get a date from the consultantant as predicted. Hoping it is going to be 29th May (when I'll be 38 weeks)but she was very vague. Maybe because I'm being induced not having a planned c-section. Had a scan and baby has long legs and a big tummy and measured 29+5 (I was 27+6 when they scanned me).

So 10 weeks to go now .. I hope.

Just had a few days in Bristol catching up with a few friends before I turn into too much of a heffer to dive long distances and cope with dd alone. Desperate for my own bed now.

Wishing you all a calm week.

XX

Whirley, I did the exact same thing last night. Woke up at 4am with abdominal pains, and lay there for an hour panicking that it was the beginning of the end. I finally fell back to sleep, and when I woke up this morning the pain was gone and I remembered that I'd eaten a bean stew for supper - definitely trapped wind then!

hi just popping on to give an update, im now 21 weeks tomorrow and had my scan today. Im having a girl both sons are over the moon.
Have to go back for another scan at 32 weeks as I have a low lying placenta.
Got my c-section date for the 28th july

Great news K and a date! I envy you!

Congratulations kcoffin27 - great to hear such good news on this thread!

And woollyjo - can I just thank you for starting it in the first place. Although nobody wants anyone else to suffer the anxieties we all do, it makes it so much easier when you can share them and know you're not alone out there.

I saw the midwife for the first time this week - she was lovely and said I could have a scan every week if I wanted to if it made me feel better. I did however have to talk about the miscarriage - went to speak about it in a very matter of fact, measured way and no words came out, just tears - very embarrassing. But she was great. Have everything crossed for my scan next week at 8 weeks. Just hoping to see a heartbeat.

Hi all

Great news K! I've got a re-scan at 32 wks for a low lying placenta too, haven't got a definite date for my C-section yet - they'll only tell me for definite 3 wks before - arrggh - I just can't wait to know when he's going to arrive!

Hope your scan goes well Trish - and you get some reassurance.

I'm fine, 28 wks today which feels like another fab milestone to reach! Come on!

Hope everyone else has a peaceful, uncomplicated weekend xx

Hi all,

Just checking in to see how you are all doing. Hope your scan goes well Trish.

I spent the week hobbling about as my back and hips seemed to be dissolving - things have almost righted themselves now, I think it was a combination of baby's position and planting the spuds last sunday everyone says don't do too much but I never know how much that is until I have done it!

On count down now, 9 weeks to go (I hope).

Looks like we'll be having our babies in the same week onebaby.

Take care all xx

Woolly - it's nice to have some one to 'hand-hold' with! Thanks for setting up this thread & for all your support - you lot have really been a tremendous support to me & it's very reassuring to share all this with people who have not had it easy either.

Every day I'm still finding something to freak myself out about - have convinced myself he's going to be premature or something. Must try to chill out a bit but it's very hard. Am so pleased to have got this far but also can't possibly believe it's going to happen & all be ok.

Hope everyone else is good & take care xx

Hi all,

Another week ticked off, how did your scan go trish? I hope it was good news.

I'm past the 30 week mark now and getting increasingly anxious. A while back I was really worried about the induction I am due at 38 weeks never having had much in the way of medical intervention for any reason. Now I am terrified of going into spontaneous labour before 38 weeks (no rational reason to expect I will, my last 2 were born at 40+2) as Niamh dies in the hoursimmediately before I went into labour.

Whilst I have most of my pg behind me (For those of you at the other end of this I know I am lucky to have gotten this far)I think the next 8 weeks are going to be very long.

Take care xx

Hi Ladies,
Good to see you are all well.
One baby & Woolly - I know what you mean about finding things to freak myself out about. This whole pregnancy after a loss palaver is petrifying.
I also cannot really believe that we might actually have a real live baby at the end of this who we get to bring home.
My section is booked for 4 weeks on friday so I really am on the final count down and to be honest I just cannot see how I will get that far. I feel a little like I am living while holding my breath.
I have a SANDS pregnancy meeting this evening so hopefully it will be good to let it out a bit.
Speak soon,
rx

Hey woollyjo! Worry is exhausting isn't it?! I'm sure you're gonna be fine. You've made it all the way to 30 weeks. I know someone who had their baby at 24 weeks and she races around with the rest of her friends so try not to worry too much. You've done so well to get this far.

My scan went really well, thank you. I did write a post but obviously my pregnancy brain got the better of me and I didn't manage to post it up properly. The sonographer advised my risk of m/c has decreased to 2% so I was utterly delighted.

However yesterday I had bad tummy pains at work which felt worryingly like the ones I had prior to the miscarriage. I thought it was happening all over again. I left work and came home to rest. Fingers crossed all seems ok but having felt more relaxed following the scan, I feel a bit like I'm back to square one and that I need to be. I don't want to believe this is going to be ok in case it isn't.

Worry, worry, worry, as you say mrs rvc. Do you think you ever get to the bit where you allow yourself to be excited about having a baby? Can you not do that at 30 weeks and over? I do hope so.

Take care ladies.

x

Hi everyone

Mrs & Woolly - I know how you feel - so pleased to have got this far but there is nothing relaxing or enjoyable about any of this & it is worry all the way!
I so hope we all have healthy babies to bring home at the end of this. The pain you two have experienced is surely enough to last a life time. Wishing you both the very best all the way xx

Trish - hope your tummy pains have gone & are nothing to worry about. Great news about the scan. No, I haven't really allowed myself get very excited about having a baby - lots of disbelief about whether we'll actually pull it off but every day it gets a bit closer to becoming a reality so that in itself is exciting.

Keep going girls - that's all we can do - every day is a step closer xxx

One baby, hope all is still going smoothly for you. Thank you for your lovely words.

Trish, so pleased to hear that your scan went well. I am sure that the cramps are ok. I had them all the way through 1st tri with this and my previous pregnancy and I always tried to assume that it was things stretching and tucking that little one in nice and tightly.

I am not sure if you know our all of our stories, but for me the reason that I cannot relax is because I lost my beautiful and perfect son neonatally after he suffered a tragic birth accident at 41+1. As such I will not believe that I will get to have a baby to keep until this one comes out screaming.

xx

Hi Ladies,

Nice to hear from you all.

Like you Mrs we won't believe this one is fine until she is in our arms as, like you our tragedy wasn't until the very end.

Folk don't seem to understand that no amount of scans and checks will make a jot of difference to this.

Outwardly trying to keep positive as I couldn't carry on otherwise and I've found, other than with the select few, being honest completely freaks people out!

Deep calming breaths all round

xx

Keep going girls - you're doing great - hang in there.
Big hugs & lots of deep breaths! xxx

Hi glad all scans are going well sending big virtual hug to all as we have all made it so far
trish hope the pains are gone, I also had pains last week just on the one side which were quite painful.
what you were all saying about not relaxing is so true, I am always on edge wish 16 weeks would just fly by and have my little bundle of joy. (all of us with tiny bundles )

Thank you so much everyone. Pains went away that evening. I took the next day off work to be on the safe side and felt better for it.

And I do realise I can't possibly understand what all of you have been through, so almost feel ridiculous being on this thread at all and commenting. But the worry for me is real, and I feel like I musn't lose the fear of not having a baby at the end of this process. It's kind of self preservation I suppose.

What we do all have is overwhelming hope that it will all be ok - that's what gets you through this isn't it?!

Hi everyone,
I hope it's ok for me to join? Wish I'd have seen this thread before writing on the others.
I MC with my first baby at the beginning of March. A day doesn't go by without my thinking of him/her and what could have been. Now I am 5 weeks pregnant, with uncomfortable cramps, both sides of of my stomach and the beginnings of light brown discharge.
I've noticed that this is a 'common' issue, but the outcomes vary. My doc's surgery is unhelpful to say the least. Am I right in waiting until next week, when I have my first midwife appt?

I wish you all the very best ladies.

Trish - so pleased things calmed down - every twinge is scarey unfortunately but you're right, all you can do is hope that everything will be ok

Welcome Rlat - of course you can join! Try asking your GP for a referral to your local Early Pregnancy Unit - that'd be your best bet - they can do scans from early on & may be able to give you an idea if it all looks ok or not. And ask to see another GP if they're not being very understanding - that's the last thing you need when you're feeling so fragile. Good luck & thanks for the best wishes xx

30 weeks for me tomorrow - wow, can't believe I'm actually saying that. Feels good.
Hope everyone has a calm weekend xx

Hi rlat - I'd second what Onebaby said and point out that you are entitled to an early scan (about 8 weeks) if you have had a previous mc. That said I still had to make a point of asking my GP to refer me for one as they don't do it automatically. Before I ever fell pg I never had much dealings with the NHS but 5pgs and 2dds (one still with us) later I have realised that you have to be prepared to fight your own corner (or have someone fight it for you) every step of the way.

Currently I'm working myself up to insist on an induction date when I see the consultant next week as i'll be 32wks by then.

Hi Lunatic saw your thread the other day with too many familiar names. Hope you get the answers you need from the tests. Keep us posted how you get on. This journey is a long way of finishing yet.

Hi Lunatic - good to hear from you, best of luck with the test results, let us know. Hope it all works out for you x

Hope everyone else is ok xx

Hi Ladies,

Here we are ticking off another week. I've got another scan on Thurs, just a check as baby is certainly active!

Take care

xx

woollyjo, just spotted your thread again and wanted to pop in to let you know I have all my fingers and toes crossed for you and the other ladies on here. Every time I get exasperated with DD2s incessant crying I think of you and think how lucky I am to have to deal with it.