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[BonzoDoodah]

Hi All
If you're over "that age" and want to chat to similar mums - join us here for gossip, slander, oggling, dieting, cake, chocolate and more ... get on here and join in hte gossip .. we don't hang round ...

hedgepig do you mean me as JJ doesn't have a boy......not that we know of anyway

yes my dear I mean you these 5am starts are really getting to me.

thanks for the congrats on my non-GD status I think I'm as surprised as the consultant to be honset though I did take a load or supplements & stuff to support my pancreas (as recommended by my homeopath)in between DS2 & this pg so maybe that helped.

Mum arrived at lunchtime and has been suitably bossy and fussy over me (am loveing it ) she put the boys to bed too as a dry run for sat and they were as good as gold which was such a relief as I've not been out & left them both for so long ever!!

duchesse I'm sure your sis will get over the boy thing (I have a feeling I'd have reacted similarly if this one had been a boy - despite already having a daughter - i really wanted a girl for DH as he's never had one of his own before). I'm sure your sis3 will be fine also - lacksadaisical's not all bad and I'd guess she wouldn't want infections again

hedgepig hope O sleeps a little longer tonight - not long before the nights start getting longer again

DH collected my dress today and I've given it a quick rinse. I'm really starting to panic about sat I'm going to have a big trying on session tomorrow so will try to bund some photos up for your professional assessment (please!!)

or "bung some photos up" even doh!!!

Hello all - phew, what a day

Well - it was all very painless and the consultant was lovely and Iris clearly adored her!

Here is the upshot in a small(ish) nutshell:
*Iris is definately different!
*She is bang on target for her ability to do things like naming, puzzles and imaginative play - showing slightly higher than average IQ skills.
*Clearly struggling with vocalising commands & sentances
*Can't be approached from the front (rather like a horse!!) - need to go at her from the side or she blocks out and you lose eye contact.
*SHE choses who she'll give eye contact to!

SO - I'm going to get funded to go on a Hanen course I know they're very precious and rare! So this will help me to help her with talking. The consultant is going into the nursery to watch her with social skills and she'll come back here in 6 mnths for a catch up and see where to take it. We've also got a block of speech therapy to be made too.

So - really good news. I feel better. I knew something was slightly odd. She couldn't and wouldn't say if it was ASD/AS etc but she said it was indeed possible that she could be so borderline that she merely crosses in and out of the spectrum. She does show autistic traits such as the echolalia speech, tip toe walking and inability to sit and do something but these are also toddler traits too. Unlike many (miserable) consultants she thought that many skills caught be taight to the point that they became natural and the more we put in the more we'll get out.

Anyway - I'm sure I'll post more when I remember bits!

May pop off to bed as I'm tired and a bit emotional. I heard this morning while I was out at the park that a friend died - AIDS related - not a surprise but very sad I fear I have a lot more of those to come as I have a number of friends who've been diagnosed for almost 20yrs. This is the 4th friend to go that way. Just makes you feel quite mortal. Ho hum. Thanks for all your nice warm wishes on the appointment. I shall return.....perky as ever...providing I get some sleep. night night xx

JJ glad it went so well! Sounds like the consultant really knew what she was doing. Also sorry to hear about your friend.

JJ well done to you both, it sounds like the consultant has made a very thorough assessment and positive things are happening, at last.

I'm so sorry to hear about you friend (((HUGS)))). It is amazing how the treatment for HIV/AIDS has increased life expectancy from what it was when it first surfaced but eventually I suppose the body can only go on so long.

JJ glad that you've got the initial appointment over with. It IS very hard to diagnose on the autistic spectrum disorders. We were in the system for over a year before they'd even venture a diagnosis.

We don't have a problem with the eye contact as DSS will make it, most of the time. At least when you are speaking to him. However, he can and will 'zone out' when he's doing something and you can't reach him communication wise. It's the obsession of what he's doing that consumes him. Still, Iris is still young and that limited attention span can just be part of being a toddler. It's really hard at her age as you say to sort out what is not right and what is just being a little one.

Sorry to hear about your friend. I used to work in a HIV clinic and it is so very sad the number of people who have contracted this awful illness. As you say, life expectancy is prolonged these days but sadly, still no cure (((hug)))

Get yourself any early night. Bet you're wiped out emotionally what with everything going on.

Hi All

Have been lurking, not posting in between mad nesting trying to get the house ready before D-Day (or B-Day) on Monday.
I am now the proud owner of a functioning dishwasher . DH wants to know if there is anything else I want now in life, as I have been banging on about getting one since we met 13 years ago . A new super turbo hoover - DH is now enjoying hoovering for the first time ever - and long may it continue .
Babies room is decorated, baby clothes and bedding washed, buggy and car seat covers washed.
Hospital bags packed (just about).
Errrm - I am getting DH to put up pictures tomorrow (hardly essential I know, but from bitter experience what doesn't get done before monday won't get done - ever).
I am managing to find some time to relax as I am not sleeping that well. In fact I used a voucher that DH gave me for Christmas and had a lovely Aveda facial today.

On the downside, I had a rotten encounter with a midwife at the hospital on Monday. I had gone in for my pre c-section appointment with the consultant, which was fine. Then saw a midwife to go over the more routine bits of how the c-section would go. I asked about skin to skin and trying to latch the baby whilst I was being stiched and got such a negative response. Won't go into details here, as there is a thread on it in childbirth, but left me feeling pretty upset .

Ermintrude I am guessing you had the same choice as us for the. I was really shocked by the number of nutters right wing and worse parties on the ballot paper. Although hopefully that will mean a very split vote for them and no overall gains. I missed out on the greens leaflet, the bearded couples sounds very 'joy of sex' but we did have our labour MEP round in person yesterday chasing our vote.

JJ good to hear that your consultant was so helpful. Sorry to hear about your friend.

JW - Well done to your DS, great grades!

Iris - glad to hear that your tests went well.

Tee - I see you are having an elective section next week too. Good luck! We will have to compare notes afterwards.

JJ so glad you posted and that you had such a positive time with the doc - and that the focus is on what Iris is doing and saying rather than on bandying labels and dx around.

Very sad news about your friend though.

onehit many congratulations on your new dishwasher. We were married 10 yrs before we got ours and now I couldn't live without it. In fact, I started wondering what choice I'd have made if DH had said - right, we can have DC#3 but the dishwasher goes. But I nipped that thought in the bud before I made any rash decisions

Right, bed and sudoku for me, oh joy. Night all.

JJ glad at least you have some positive results with the doctor. Hope it continues.
Sorry to hear about your friend.

Those having CS please let me know how soon you can be back to work etc. I am still in debate.

Re- boy girl babies. I confess that I would have been a little disappointed if I was having another 2 girls but healthy is the main thing. I am apprehensive as I don't know what to do with a little boy.

Mare wasn't up for it last night so we have to try again tonight- I think we will have to prostaglandin (injection) her as she may have a folicle stuck- I really don't need this malarky! I wonder if that ever happens to women?

onehit sounds like a horrid MW appointment for sure. Do you have a birthing plan that says that you want to do have the skin to skin and such? I was speaking to my OB/MW about this last week when we scheduled mine and they were very supportive of the idea.

I guess I am the only person I know who has to spend the night before the CS in the hospital. I am guessing it is because of my diabetes. But I am a bit nervous about it for some reason. Not about the CS, but about the night before.

Off to get measured for nursing bras today! And find a rug for the nursery floor. Anyone who hasn't seen it on my facebook can see pictures of the nursery here.

morning, Tee lovely nursery your LO will be very cosy in there .

Onehit I'm sorry you didn't get a positive response from the hospital mw.

Neddie my experiace of cs was that it took a long time to be comfortable lifting things after the cs (more than the 6 weeks) but I wasn't very fit before which didn't help. But other people recover very quickley, you just don't know how it will turn out!

Tee that nursery looks lovely! Makes me slightly because I remember lovingly decorating rooms for both DD and DS whereas this LO will be in with us at first and then might have a cot in the erstwhile spare room - complete with double bed and adult furniture - or in DD's room on 2nd floor, depending on how well s/he sleeps! Poor little mite, we may as well put it in a drawer...

Both DC currently have medium-sized rooms on the top floor and their own shower room, so DH has big plans about converting the loft for DD and having them all up there 'out of the way' . It would leave us with a spare room, but would cost £££ so prob won't happen.

Is everyone having a lie-in?

Morning all.
tee oh wow - that's a proper nursery! Loving the rocking chair Have fun with the bras and the rug!

onehit great news on the dishwasher. We've had ours a year and the novelty still hasn't worn off for me! Sorry about the consultant/mw comment. TBH I'd gone for skin to skin while on the table having the CS but it when we tried it was so blinking awkward - gown, monitors, stuff on my finger that I asked for her to go to DP for a snuggle. I had her at 9.02am and she was feeding like a little trooper at 9.30am back in the recovery room where they could help me to get her to latch on properly. It all worked fine and by the time I was on the ward she'd got the hang of it! All I need now is a manual to tell me how to stop feeding!!!!

neddie first Emerg CS - awful but 2nd time round, I could lift Iris up within 3 weeks - no problems. I think the fitter you are the better. The stronger your arms, back, stomach muscles are then the easier it'll be to regain the strength.

Off to the shops, pick up Iris and then an afternoon of playdoh awaits!

Hi

Tee your nursery looks lovely! I love the tall unit and the chest of drawers/changing table. It is a pain you have to stay in the night before, although we have to be at the hospital by 7.30am , so I am expecting to be up by about 5.30am at the very latest - I will be nil by mouth for fluids from 6am, so at least want to get a quick juice in before then. I also have to shower with some special antibac stuff in the morning. So maybe you will get a lie in (comparatively speaking) . Oh, don't know if you already have them in your hospital bag, but ear plugs and an eye mask are worth taking, particularly for that first night. I even used the ear plugs once DD was born, as I could still hear her if she cried, but it dulled the noise of other peoples babies crying, midwives clomping up and down the corridors (are clogs really such a good footwear choice for a night shift? ) and people being admitted in the middle of the night.

Ermintrude - Great to hear feeding went so well in recovery, I have got in my birth plan that I would like skin to skin in theatre, but that of course I understand it might not be possible or I might not actually feel well enough whilst being stitched. I will just have to wait and see now . Not sure I have any good advice on the stopping feeding, as I fed DD till she was nearly 3 . To be honest it had dropped down to first thing only, as part of an early morning snuggle/desparate attempt by me to stay in bed a bit longer when she was waking at 6am and I just did don't offer, don't refuse. It was such a gradual thing that I don't remember a 'last' feed as such, which I am glad about.

I really really am having a lazy day today - went back to bed at 8.30am,just got up and DH is cooking brunch . I have realised that I only have 3 days to rest, so I am going to make the most of it.

Sorry I meant JJ re: the feeding in recovery/stopping feeding, not Ermintrude (argh must have switched brain off today!) .
Serves me right for trying to post twice in one day.

onehit insist on what you'd like to happen after LO is born. It's your baby and don't be railroaded - even by miserable MW's!

No advice on CS's to offer as never had one but I do understand they tell you not to drive/lift for 6 weeks afterwards. Was never sure how you're supposed to look after a baby if you can't actually lift it up

Bit busy here today hence lack of posts. Yes tee your nursery is lovely I've only just got rid of our Dutailier chair and K loved being it so I'm sure that your LO will love the rocker.

JW you can't life anything heavier than the baby! That's what I've been told.

Thanks for the compliments on the nursery. I am pretty chuffed with it myself! Now just want to find a rug to put next to the cot, as it looks a bit barren to me.

Went to M&S to get measured for nursing bras. Woman there was a completely unhelpful cow. She measured me and said 'well, maybe 44 b or c. Maybe 42 b or c.' and left me to it. Well they had neither size so I left. And just ordered from the web! Way to lose a £100+ order, M&S!

oh dear at M&S. You should complain. You'll probably receive a couple of free bras by way of compensation. I'd complain anyway just for the sheer enjoyment of doing so.....hehe.

I have a tiny dilemma today. I would like to send my ex MiL a birthday card this month. She's 84 and in very bad health, so might be her last. We always got on really well when I was married to her son but kinda lost touch with her when we divorced. She lost her DH 2 years ago. Anyway, I'd like to send her a b'day but not sure if it'll cause a load of fuss (now he's married ex Best friend) or that it might seem odd. She's always asking the boys/ex DH about Katherine so not sure what to do. I thought I might put a little update in there re Katherine and a little pic.

Whaddya think?

jw Go for it - life is too short. Good lord, you're the mother of her grandchildren. I'm sure she'd love a little card and if you do it by way of an update - pic/notelet telling her about K and the others - I think she'd be thrilled. When you get older, you probably realise how futile many rows, disagreements are (unless you're Norris off Corrie!) and something like that would only please you Well, that's my thoughts on it! I like the fact that DPs ex-wife STILL chats to my MIL and invites her to the US to visit. Not sure why - but I think it's that it makes everything seem civilised. I think it's a lovely idea.

tee bad M&S - BAD! Mind you - nice neat cup sizes....lucky you

Iris back from nursery - had a fab time and apparently she even socialised with a few children SHe also ate all her fishpie [double shock emoticon]

JJ so glad that Iris is having a good time. At long last after the poking and prodding by 'those in the know' she gets to have a bit of fun. You go Iris!

The only dilemma I have with sending her a card is if ex Best friend takes umbrage and starts rocking the boat. I don't wish for ex DH to see this as some exercise in upsetting his mother/wife. I ran it by DS#1 this morning (her grandson) and he just said 'go for it, grandma would like it'. I shall send her something though like you say, an update along with b'day wishes.

I'm just arranging for a half case of wine for my friend who is the sister on SCBU in Bury. She's off to start her new life in Southampton with her new toyboy and is to start new job at the Royal Winchester hospital next month. I'll be so sad to see her go and we're doing a final lunch before she heads off. Anyway, thought I'd send her wine as seem more practical (and fun) than flowers

JW I was about to say what JJ said, honest! I think older women are less bothered by 'etiquette' and more generally pleased to hear about ALL babies however tenuous their relationship. And in this case she and you have known one another for years and the baby is her grandchildren's little sis, so I think she'd be delighted both to get a card from you and to hear about baby K .

onehit get that R&R in while you can!

Tee I always think that bra-measuring ladies should be the very best confidence-inducing ego-enhancing salespeople the store can provide and if they're lacklustre they deserve to lose business! You can always send back mail-order and actually you might end up making use of both sizes - I looked at my old nursing bras the other night and I went through 38D, 36DD, 36C, 34D and 34C in 18 months

Awww, JW that's nice of you - I'm sure she'll be chuffed to bits with the wine.

We're off to Winchester tomorrow - to meet with DPs glamorous American cousin. We're taking FIL with us as it's his birthday (joy!)...so we're all meeting up half way to where she is staying with her new man. She is a rock-star type person (former reality tv star in the states - looking for new lead singer of INXS) and turns out so is her new man. He's subject to the US gossip colums at the moment for dumping his kind-of famous girlfriend for DPs cousin. They're in the UK to 'chill' although he is from Somerset - so we get to meet them both tomorrow. I know by the end of the day I'll feel a frump!!!

Off to load the washing machine and make lasagne. Cor - I can tell you're all thrilled by my afternoon

ermintrude she's really a lovely lady and yes, it's her grandsons' (half) sister so there is a link, albeit tenuous.

I was thinking about you this morning dear. You must be nearly there now. How's the arrangements going (apart from holeing up the older ones in the tower/attic)? hehe.

JJ More Winchester on the thread this afternoon?! Small world eh? All roads lead to....errr...Hampshire

Will you have FiL in the back of the Doblo, randomly shouting 'PEASANTS!' at passers by?

Wow, your extended family and partners sounds really glam. None of mine are remotely connected to anyone famous...not even on the Z list. I guess that we're all peasants........