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Pregnancy After Miscarriage Part VII - Gusset Reporters and Knicker Checkers welcome

1000 replies

SparkyMalarky · 17/01/2009 18:01

oooh, I do love a new thread

OP posts:
scarlotti · 26/02/2009 14:37

lal123 - congratulations on your news! Understand completely how you feel though as in the same boat here.

Not sure at what point we get to relax and let nature take over

Were you told to phone the EPAU before then? I'm wondering if I'm supposed to or not. have booked a dr's appt for next Thurs so might ask then what's the best thing to do.

ladyhelen2 · 26/02/2009 14:49

little polly so sorry to hear your news. Please take care of yourself and we hope to see you back here soon. Don't give up hope!

lal123 · 26/02/2009 14:56

after my first mc the EPAU told me to phone them next time I was pregnant after 5 weeks. Likewise after my last mc. Last time I was preg I called them and got an early scan really quickly. Not sure if its the same everywhere though?

I'm not ruching to make a Drs appointment - he never seems to do much anyway - I'd rather stick with EPAU if I can

Wheelybug · 26/02/2009 16:15

Polly - so sorry to hear your news. Take care of yourself and hope you're back here soon.

Welcome Scarlotti, Foxy and lal. Here's hoping the particularly worrying first trimester hurries up for you all.

Just realised Bunny is having her c-sec today. Thinking of you Bunny - looking forward to hearing the news !

Waves at Dan !

franfoxy2003 · 26/02/2009 18:03

thanks guys! i think its sinking in today that i could actually have this baby had got used to the idea it was gonna go wrong after loosing the last 2! but hey 12 weeks now so i THINK its gonna be fine! sorry to hear your news polly, my thoughts r with u!

Sazstar · 26/02/2009 20:37

LittlePolly,

So sorry to hear your news. Know the sinking feeling as the scanning people go silent

Had my fingers crossed all day for you.

Make sure you and DH give each other huge amounts of cuddles, I know it took us quite a while to even come to terms with what was happening.

Hope the next few days aren't too bad. Look after yourself.

SparklyPseudonym · 26/02/2009 20:42

Evening ladies,

Mind if I join in too?

Had a BFP last Friday after blighted ovum in September which was picked up at 11 weeks after having a small amount of brown discharge.

Have been feeling ok this week but a struggling to stay positive today. My back has been aching since before I found out and I had a tiny, tiny spot of brown discharge today. Breasts are still sore (prob from excessive poking!!). We are planning to have a scan at 7 weeks.

Good luck to all of you.

Polly Am so sorry to read your news. It's such a terrible time. Am thinking of you.

tsom · 26/02/2009 20:45

littlepolly sad to hear your news, it always seems so unfair when it happens again

bunny hope all went well today

dan no, life will never return to normal, but eventually a better version of normal. Remember my GP cheerfully commenting how having a child was a life changing event at ds1's 6 week check. As ds1 was merrily peeing and pooing over the dr's change mat at the time I gritted my teeth and said I had been hoping it was just a blip... does get easier though but oh the first month... you will sleep again (one day)

HerNameWasLola · 26/02/2009 21:11

LittlePolly so sorry to hear your news. Look after yourself over the coming days and weeks. The Emmsy's Angels thread is brilliant if you'd like extra support. Wish things had turned out differently for you

Sparkly pull up a sofa and make yourself at home Lovely to see you here. Won't bother repeating what I said on the other thread, but I meant every word. Do you have a date for your scan yet? Sending big un-mn like (((hugs)))

Bunny where's our update then? What are you doing?!? Hope it all went really well today, and that you are cradling your LO in your arms as I type

Hi to everyone else, so sorry no time to catch up properly, but wishing extra luck to all those who have scans coming up (including me - a week on monday.... seems like all we do is limp from scan to scan. Not complaining though.)

Scarlotti re relaxing and letting nature take over, I think that happens in about 15-20 years if you're lucky. But I believe it can sometimes take longer

lal123 · 27/02/2009 10:58

I couldn't wait any longer and called EPAU - have a scan booked for 17th March - fingers crossed we make it that farxx

SparklyPseudonym · 27/02/2009 12:01

Lola Thank you for all your kind words and advice.
Lal How many weeks will you be at scan? Sending you lots of sticky vibes.

Went to visit my GP this am and she has booked a scan for next Friday when I'm hoping to be 6 weeks pregnant.

scarlotti · 27/02/2009 12:14

Fingers crossed for all you ladies booked in for scans. I will speak to my GP next Thurs and see what he says - he's very nice and I think he'll refer me if I ask. I'll be 5 weeks at my appointment so will try and get a scan for around the 7 or 8 week mark I think.

Sparkly - why did your doc choose for one at 6 weeks? Can they see much then?

lal123 - how far gone will you be on the 17th March?

LittlePolly · 27/02/2009 12:26

I just wanted to say thank you everyone for your messages of support. It really does mean a lot to know there are others out there who understand how this feels and have the generosity of spirit to share their compassion. Thank you.

I am feeling much calmer today, hoping this mc happens sooner rather than later so that we can move on and try again. DH's work are being great about this and have said he can stay at home with me next week. Given my age (39) we are thinking that we might go straight for IVF now ? we had actually decided on that route before I fell pregnant naturally this time.

Well, I hope to be back here in time to catch up with some of you again. In the meantime, I wish you all happy and trouble-free pregnancies.

Much love
xxxx

SparklyPseudonym · 27/02/2009 12:36

Scarlotti I'm not sure why she suggested 6 weeks - I think this is the earliest you can be seen at the local EPU. She said we might not see a HB but should be able to see sac and fetal pole. They'll re-scan until they hopefully find a HB. We were thinking of booking a private scan around the 7/8 week mark too but will take it one step at a time.

SparklyPseudonym · 27/02/2009 12:37

LittlePolly Am sending you so many well wishes. Take care of yourself and all the best for IVF is you decide to go ahead with it.

lal123 · 27/02/2009 12:47

no idea really how far gone I'll be - I'm guessing I'm about 5 weeks now - so about 7-8 weeks?

dan39 · 27/02/2009 12:56

Hi all

I am tired but I need to sort out a new phone contract so here I am. Thank you all for your reassurance that it gets better - it must do or everyone would have jumped off a cliff by now!

She has just had a little feed but fallen asleep leaving my boob hard - do I express it off or not? Do I offer her the same one next time?? I dunno!!!

Sorry lots of new people , I haven't had time to read back but will send sticky thoughts to you all and keep my fingers crossed.

scarlotti · 27/02/2009 14:06

dan39 - you can express off if you're uncomfortable. You can freeze breast milk for quite a while - I want to say 6 months but do check that with your midwife.
Alternating each feed will make sure she gets the drink part first before the feed part, and will also help regulate your supply. You'll find that they will get really hard and probably leak a lot for a week or so until she and you get into a regular pattern.
She'll also start to take more from you soon so that will help her stay satisfied for longer - great at night when some more sleep would be nice

scarlotti · 27/02/2009 14:08

Sparkly - I think I might ask for a scan after a heartbeat can be seen. If I make it past next Friday then that will be longer than m/c 1. M/c2 was at 10 weeks but hadn't grown properly and no hb found. I think I'd relax a lot more if I could have a scan and see a heartbeat, so if that would happen at 7 or 8 weeks then I'd chill a bit more.

SparklyPseudonym · 27/02/2009 14:32

Scarlotti - I agree about relaxing more once you see a HB (I think m/c stats are less than 3% then) but my last m/c was a blighted ovum which meant only the sac had grown. I'd feel v reassured seeing a fetal pole (hopefully). I'm driving myself mad at the moment. We have to develop our positive mental attitudes.
Dan - My DD often fell asleep when feeding and I'd express it off and then she'd wake again for a feed. Have you tried lots of blowing on her when she's feeding/undressing her to keep her awake to try and empty a bit more and make you comfortable? I know everyone says this but it does get MUCH easier.

scarlotti · 27/02/2009 15:20

Sparkly - understand totally where you're coming from. Think it's all coloured by our previous experiences. We didn't see a hb last time so I think I'd feel reassured because of the stats. Although until I pass 12 weeks I won't relax no matter how many scans I have

ashleighbeee · 27/02/2009 15:47

LittlePolly I am so so sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you..

Ohhh Dan its so lovely hearing you speak about your breastfeeding habbits etc, reminds me that I will be there with a little one...

I am 14 weeks and 3 days today.. does anyone else count every single day? I never forget what day i am on - if anyone asks me i know PRECISELY what to say.. I am obsessed by following my dates.. We have our first NHS scan on Monday, we've already seen our beautiful baby 4 times (privately as we're not blessed with a lovely EPU unfortunately)

Scarlotti def agree that you relax more after having seen a heartbeat (my m/c was blighted ovum also). It was so so reasurring the first time we went, 7 weeks 4 days, seeing a little flicker in the baby's chest!! I'd decided to wait until 7 1/2 weeks however it helped having a holiday from 5 weeks - 7 weeks so only had 4 days to wait once we got home.. definitely helped tho, although comparing all 4 of our photos its hard to imagine that i cherished the first one so much - the 4th one you could see legs, nose and big tummy etc..

Sparkly Welcome to the knickerchecker thread.. you've found the right place to voice your worries/joy etcetc.. I've definately found some comfort since i joined!

hope all is going well with bunny... Wonder when we'll get an update.. I wonder if they'd mind us including a laptop and MN in our birthing plans.. just to keep the thread updated just a thought...

Well Thats my small update for the time being! Hope everyone else is okay, sorry i've not replied to all.. I am hoping to be back on Monday afternoon telling you all about my fabulous scan... please all wish me luck.. I'll be 14+6 i think after this one i might (just might) be able to relax xx

scarlotti · 27/02/2009 19:25

ashleighbeee - hope you manage to keep sane this weekend whilst waiting! I think it's much easier to relax after the NHS one, although am sure your other scans have helped too.

I'm def going to ask the gp if I can go for a scan then at around 7.5 weeks. Only 3.5 weeks from now so much less time to stress than waiting until 12/13 weeks!

Fingers crossed he says yes!

dan39 · 27/02/2009 19:49

ashleigh good luck on Mon with the scan!Yes I counted every day too - at one point got 'demoted' back by a scan and was gutted to lose 6 days!!
Bunny hope we get news soon!!
sparkly will try the blowing trick! I am worried I won't have it for her if she decides she wants it. The worst bit is when she makes faces as she feds as if its horrid...

tracyea · 27/02/2009 20:43

Little polly - I've only just caught up and I am so sorry. What a horrible shock for you and DH. Give yourself a month or so off but don't give up. You are obviously still fertile and just because this had happened it does not mean it will happen next time. I will keep everything crossed for you that things work out soon.

It sounds terrible to say it now but my scan went really well yesterday. I've gained a few days so am now 8+3 and my bean looks good.

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