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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Things they don't tell you before you get pregnant

302 replies

AnguaVonUberwald · 12/09/2008 11:51

I know this has been done before, and that there are lots of bad things they don't tell you before you get pregnant.

But also, everyone goes on about how once you have the baby your life will never be the same again - they don't mention that you will love the baby so much, you will really like the new way, and not mind that everything you once enjoyed about your life has changed, because you have your baby instead.

OK, and then there is:

That you might never get the second trimester energy rush, and in fact might be exhausted all the way through!

That you will get instant attention from the NHS, until you get to 36 weeks pregnant, and then they will ignore you unless you can prove you are in labour (something that is impossible to do)

That you will never see the same midwife twice

That they will make you take home your wee, clean out the tub, and wee in it again a month later!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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sandcastles · 13/09/2008 00:52

You will obsess over every possible symptom from the moment you conceive to the moment you give birth.

Or lack, thereof!

Ellora · 13/09/2008 00:53

That I could go from a professional organised women to not even remembering anything e.g. what I am in the middle of cooking!!

The itchy belly and aches and pains from week 12 onwards!

Inability to sleep comfortably from this early on (15 weeks) just cannot get comfortable at all!

Oh the constipation and constant loo runs throughout the night every night.

The horrifying constant dreams every night for the last 3 weeks that change every night!

The constant exhaustion from day one right through to week 16!

Am I just having a rough time maybe?
(hmm)

Original poster
AnguaVonUberwald · 13/09/2008 11:57

That you really can be exhausted for the whole 9 months

OP posts:
staryeyed · 13/09/2008 12:25

That you wont care about make up when you are in labour (contrary to my plans to be fully made up and gleaming) How stupid was I?!

ditto nakedness, freshly shaved, pooing etc. I was obviously watching too many movies instead of real birthing videos.

naturalblonde · 13/09/2008 17:01

That you will think that you can't possibly get any bigger without your belly exploding then realise you've still got 2 months to go.

wastingmyeducation · 13/09/2008 20:41

That not only can you not sleep on your front (obviously), but that you can't sleep on your back either.
One of the best things about the epidural was lying on my back for the first time in months (I'd pretty much realised that the whole birth plan was shot to shit by that point).

xx

kraftwerkkittie · 14/09/2008 11:07

mild incontinence.

that contrary to reports that you'll turn into a horny sexbeast, sex becomes quite painful

that when you go in to give birth you need to bring your own everything. i now have visions of us turning up at the labour ward with 3 cases, a sombrero and a wicker donkey...

hedgehog1979 · 14/09/2008 11:54

That morning sickness does not stop once you have given birth. I threw up everyday from 6 weeks until ds was 2 days old!

lollipopmother · 14/09/2008 11:59

They don't tell you that it's perfectly reasonable to get up 8 times in a night to go for a piss, only to then not feel the need to have one for the next 10 hours once you're awake.

wellbalanced · 14/09/2008 13:14

I have nothing to add but can i just say this has cheered me up and made me smile!!!! Ill enjoy the next 6mths!!!!!

polester · 14/09/2008 15:00

They also don`t warn you of complete strangers desire to "touch" your bump - what is that about?

On the subject of labour - my ante natal classes told me labour was like bad period pains - I DON`T THINK SO

You are not warned of your need for your own mum after you have given birth - I regressed to this little girl wanting a hug from her mum & reasuurance for days after giving birth

Spacial awareness disapears

SmugColditz · 14/09/2008 15:04

Go on holiday together before the baby gets here, as a holiday with anyone under 18 isn't a holiday at all.

SummerLightning · 14/09/2008 18:52

that you keep forgetting words and forming sentences such as "Can you pass me the thingy to go in the thingy?"

frazzledoldbag34 · 14/09/2008 20:18

You might turn into a loon (by which I mean forgetful, hysterical, irrational, tearful, etc at any moment)- and this can continue for a few months postnatally too....

Your feet might become HUGE (I had to buy size 8 boots when I was pg and even then they became too tight) - I'm normally a 5 and a half!

You will get bigger than you believed possible. And then keep getting bigger.

You will feel like the heartburn will never end - but it does the minute the baby is out!!! Marvellous

You will snore. horribly. So horribly that your DH will choose to sleep downstairs on his own on the sofa rather than suffer the racket you make night after night...

And this may be TMI but you might have permanently soggy knickers - not from weeing in them (although this is also a possibility) but from increased ahem, discharge. It's horrid and most unexpected.

Your legs and pubes will become hairier than before. And the hair will be longer and thicker. Why I don't know, it just is. Gross.

Sorry, shall I stop now??

frazzledoldbag34 · 14/09/2008 20:20

I could continue....pg with DC3 so getting geared up for some new horrors this time.............
Oh yes, and I forgot about consitipation. And piles. Enough said.

frazzledoldbag34 · 14/09/2008 20:29

By the way, just looked at the Hot Milk website. Just gorgeous. Will definitely be doing some shopping there! Thanks to the person who mentioned this - you're a star!

PinkTulips · 14/09/2008 20:37

frazzled.... i'm so glad someone mentioned the soggy knickers it's truely hideous and in the last trimester every time you notice the dampness you panic madly about 'slow leaking waters' and hyperventilate trying to find a bathroom to check and will give your dp nervous breakdows by constnatly saying 'o god, i think i feel a trickle!'

itchy nipples

the fact that needing to brush your teeth will make you gag as much as the taste of the toothpaste does so you'll spend hours working up the courage to brush them and not feel any better after than you did before.

that the baby takes up alot of room and you won't be able to breathe, move or relax after the 7th month and will cry nightly wanting it out NOW!

that just because you never had acne in your life will not exempt you form pregnancy acne.

THAT MOST WOMEN DO NOT FUCKING GLOW AND YOU WILL NOT BE ONE OF THE LUCKY FEW

saramoon · 14/09/2008 20:53

That you will never have enough pillows to get comfortable at night, one for under your tummy, one for your back, one for feet, head..........I am not pregnant but have two dds ( 2 and 3) and have loved reading this, it is very funny and soooooo true.

MsSparkle · 14/09/2008 20:55

That the pain doesn't actually always stop the second the baby is out.

Piles.

WheresTheAuPair · 14/09/2008 21:00

You may find that even years after giving birth you still opt to sleep with a pillow between your knees! (or is that just me?)

You may accidentally shave an 'arrow shape' into your pubes in an attempt to tame the undergrowth. Done blindly of course (and probably pointed out by a bemused DH)

gagamama · 14/09/2008 21:49

As soon as you announce you are pregnant, it becomes acceptable etiquette for anyone at all to comment quite harshly on your physical appearance.

Time seems to take on the previously impossible property of passing both far too quickly and far too slowly.

1sttimer80 · 14/09/2008 22:56

EVERYONE has an opinion about whether you are pregnant with a girl or a boy and are adamant about their opinion.

Your motherinlaw (as nice as she may be) may suddenly decide that she is closer to you than your own mum and will want to be with you every step of the birth... including in the labour ward (some maybe ok with this... some may not!!) and think it's her god given right to be there (even over her own son!).

frazzledoldbag34 · 15/09/2008 09:31

Oh just thought of another one...
People will think it's ok to ask you how much weight you have gained in your pregnancy. Which is just rude. And nosy. And really, the last thing you want to be worrying about (unless you've only gained 7 lb or something and look like a model in which case, go ahead and tell EVERYONE to make them really, really envious!)

mummy2000 · 15/09/2008 09:33

That the moment you tell your partner that you are pregnant you find your sex life disappears as he think he will hurt the baby despite you telling him it wont.

That you get heartburn from conception even if you have never had heartburn in your life!

That even piles start from very early on!

You feel like someone have punched your breasts repeatedly!

That even if you are normally a very calm person that you now seem like you have split personality and feel like killing everyone that says one thing out of place.Crying(for no reason), happy, sad etc. Basically like you have constant pms.

How annoying it is when your partner says that he doesn't mind when you get fat!!! Hello!! I'm not getting fat, i'm pregnant!! Grrr!! Also when any arguement you have he will blame it on your hormones so wont take it seriously!!

cmotdibbler · 15/09/2008 09:42

That morning sickness may just be like an all day hangover, rather than just a puke.

Exactly how much blood there will be after the birth and how long it can go on (actually, my colleague did tell me this, so it wasn't quite so much of a shock, but I didn't expect it to go on for 12 weeks)

That if your baby is prem, afterwards everyone will tell you that they thought your baby would be early.