Due December 2025

[HariboFantastics]

Hi!

Just thought i’d start a thread as I know a few of us have found out we are expecting! Would love to hear everyone’s stories to start us off as I know December feels soooo far away yet!

I’ll go first, I already have one child, he is 6 years old Totally did not plan to have anymore once me and his dad split, I was one and done. However, years on met my current other half and I just knew straight away I had a change of heart. We started trying 18 months ago with negatives every month, later finding out there was infertility on both our sides. We moved in together January this year after deciding we would give IVF a try once we were settled in new GPs etc, only to find out we were pregnant! This came to an abrupt end 3 days later where we had what’s known as a chemical pregnancy. Absolutely heartbroken I had half given up, what were the chances we would fall pregnant again so soon after so long of nothing?

Well, here we are, after only 1 cycle later, pregnant again! Hopefully this time is different for us, it definetly feels different!

I just need to vent. I'm high risk and have a cervical length scan every 2 weeks follower by seeing my consultant for a review. My manager is off this week so I popped a message into the group chat for the other 2 team members, just as an FYI that I'd be away from my desk but would have my phone on me if anyone needed me. One team member questioned how long I'm away from my desk (3.5 hours, including my lunch, I have 2 appointments, 2 hours apart). She suggested I could log in and work from the waiting room. To start with it really annoyed me, then my hormones took over and I cried.

I then get to maternity to find that they booked my consultant appointment before my scan and I need the scan first, so potentially I'd be sat for 2 hours before being seen by anyone, meaning I could be here even longer. So I burst out crying again. Luckily they managed to move my scan forward so now just waiting on my consultant. But I needed to vent to people who might understand my uncontrollable hormonal crying in public.

I did point out to the colleague that I'm entitled to 6.5 hours off per appointment and this time is blocked out in my diary every 2 weeks.

I just need to vent. I'm high risk and have a cervical length scan every 2 weeks follower by seeing my consultant for a review. My manager is off this week so I popped a message into the group chat for the other 2 team members, just as an FYI that I'd be away from my desk but would have my phone on me if anyone needed me. One team member questioned how long I'm away from my desk (3.5 hours, including my lunch, I have 2 appointments, 2 hours apart). She suggested I could log in and work from the waiting room. To start with it really annoyed me, then my hormones took over and I cried.

I then get to maternity to find that they booked my consultant appointment before my scan and I need the scan first, so potentially I'd be sat for 2 hours before being seen by anyone, meaning I could be here even longer. So I burst out crying again. Luckily they managed to move my scan forward so now just waiting on my consultant. But I needed to vent to people who might understand my uncontrollable hormonal crying in public.

I did point out to the colleague that I'm entitled to 6.5 hours off per appointment and this time is blocked out in my diary every 2 weeks.

@emzlyzoh gosh let me guess the team member who asked you to work in the waiting area is a man. They are not all like this but why do we always pump into one of them 😑 they are your team members they should be lucky you had the curtesy to even let them know that you’ll be away from your desk. The only person who actually needs to be aware is your line manager. Who are they to even say anything. I’m fuming for you! 🤬 Do your thing. Jobs come and go but you’ll always be a mummy xxx

@emzlyz 🤬 feeling this emoji on your behalf. Please remember your wider rights and find empowerment in that - this sort of behaviour from colleagues is uneducated at best, discriminatory at worst. It would interest me if they are line managers of people because they should know about the Equality Act and the immediate protections you have as a pregnant person - similarly ACAS website states about time off for antenatal appointments:

What counts as reasonable time for an appointment

'Reasonable' time off for an antenatal appointment includes:

• the length of the appointment or class
• travel to and from it

If you have an appointment in the middle of a working day or shift, it's a good idea to talk with your employer about how long it'll take.

They might agree to flexible working. For example they might allow you to:

• work from home for the rest of the day if it'll take too long to get back to work
• change your start and finish times

Your employer cannot make you change an antenatal appointment to a different time if you do not want to.

I would raise the incident with HR, you don’t need to make anything formal of it but they may wish to ‘re-educate’ the individual involved so that you don’t have to travel with further stress if another comment is made during future plans. Find it absolute madness that in 2025 we still have to push back on bad behaviour. Hope you are okay, similarly it’s okay to be having a weepy day - I couldn’t stop crying yesterday over absolutely nothing, even song lyrics were setting me off! Wishing you all the best with your appointments, I hope they go well today and you have some peace of mind going home xx

@GlowWorm89 it's actually a woman, who is a mother herself. She's not anyone's line manager and loves to say she's not part of our team.

To make it worse my consultant now thinks I have gestational diabetes. I know it's not the worst thing, but it's added stress and I have spent even more of my day crying because of it.

@emzlyz her being a woman makes it even more frustrating. I’m so sorry you have to but up with this 🫶
Gestational diabetes is not fun. It’s definitely added stress that you don’t need. But the good thing is you have to watch what you’re eating for what’s left of your pregnancy and then it will go. I’m sure you can find someone here who you can speak to, to help you through this with their own experience.
l’m a plus size mum to be and it’s a concern in the back of my head as well. I’ve got my test on the 24th September.
also I agree with @IcyLimeSwan about potentially going to HR about this woman at work.
Don’t let the stress at work get to you. If you need time to calm down, ask if you could work from home or take few days off. I’m so sorry you having to but up with this when it’s meant to be one of the happiest times of your life xxx

@emzlyz I would also recommend speaking to HR. You have been more than courteous by telling them you're away from the desk & you have your phone. You had no obligation to be contactable during your appointment. Being pregnant is protected by law.

On a positive note with the diabetes, treatment these days for GD is pretty good. If you need insulin its more likely you will get a closed loop pump than having to do daily injections and these are really safe and discreet to use. It's treatable and manageable and you will have all the extra support from your maternity team as the diabetes team. This ensures you and baby stay as safe as possible.

Sending you love x

Thank you everyone. I just feel like I've cried alot today. I've taken screenshots of the work chat to send to my manager next week when she returns and I've changed my diary so I'm working from home tomorrow and Monday. Will discuss it with my manager on Monday because this isn't the first time I've had issues with this staff member. She told my manager I was pregnant before I did. I only told her because she kept sending me jobs (I had been looking at jobs before getting pregnant). I've now booked annual leave on Tuesday for my hospital appointment. Hubby is off that day so we will make the most of having an afternoon together. I'm still owed 5 days from last year, I was going to just let them go because it seems more hassle than it's worth to claim them, but after today I'm definitely going to get them transferred to this years entitlement and use them.

@Ronnie09 I’m taking 2 weeks before I’m due as holiday & as I’m due on a Saturday I’ll start my stat maternity on the Monday after my due date. With my last I had my maternity leave the day of or week of due date just purely for money & saved 2 weeks holiday for before due date.
planning on taking the full 12 months at only stat pay so wanna start it as late as I could 😂

im so impressed with you ladies at how prepared you are! This is my 2nd so I have everything up in loft but I’ve not even started thinking about it 😂 life to busy at the moment but I’ve dedicated Oct weekends to sorting everything out.

@emzlyz i would certainly speak to your manager/HR about the particular colleague she shouldn’t be asking when you’re back or expecting you to take your work phone! It’s blocked out in my calendar and if I’m late from an appointment then I’m late they’ll have to deal with it & your colleague should be the same! Also telling your boss you were pregnant before you had chance is shocking!! I’d of put in a complaint then! Hope you aren’t to stressed with it all now.

Hi everyone. I introduced myself earlier. Sadly I had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks in March. I'm pregnant again now (very early days). Needed three surgeries to clear things.

Wishing you all the best for your pregnancies. I'll be a few months behind all being well :)

We had our repeat scan this week and all looking good. Finally got the measurements we needed although he was covering his face a lot again.

I've now started struggling with low BP & ended up on the floor at work 3 times 🫣 seems never ending with different symptoms/issues. Thankfully when BP normalises I feel fine again so planning to take mornings a little slower and try to eat a bit more.

Baby is very active, I can actually see movement at times which is amazing and the closer I get to the 24 week mark, the more excited I am finally feeling.

We have a name picked and have started using it around the dogs, they're now banned from his room and we have done quite a lot of shopping. Waiting for my MATB1 form so I can put my dates in but planning on working until 30th Nov with a plan for 2 weeks AL and then see when he wants to arrive.

Can't believe we are on the tail end now! It's truly a miracle and I feel so blessed despite having a rough time.

We have 2 more embryos in the freezer and I would love to have a 2nd but at the moment feel the risk outweighs the benefit for us. There's also the cost implications but I'm not ready to donate them onwards, I think I need to wait for baby to arrive and hormones to normalise before I make that very big decision.

Hope you are all well xx

Hi how do I get on the group WhatsApp please? ☺️

We've made it to 24 weeks! Huge milestone for Baby Pombear ❤️

How is @everyone doing? 3rd Trimester here we come.

Baby Pombear is 28+2. I have Covid & a UTI so not doing so well but he's wriggling around so midwives are happy.

When is everyone taking mat leave? I'm aiming to go at 38 weeks but the closer I get the more unlikely I think I will reach that mark.

Oh no hope you are ok! I’m shattered! Aiming for 35 weeks but struggling tbh!!!

@CheeryPombear also got covid over here...not bad though, just tired and bad cough. Think its about the 4th time iv had it over the years 🙈
28 weeks tomorrow, feeling very heavy! Im going on MAT leave end of October, work in a school and really cant face going back after Half term.
Has everyone bought all they need now? This is baby #3 plus SS so really laid back and have mostly been collecting freebies and FB market place shopping. Just got clothes and my post partum stuff to buy. Also trying breast&pump to put in a bottle this time which havent done previously. Anyone any tips for breastfeeding and pumping to bottle feed?

@CheeryPombearAw hope you feel better soon!

can’t believe I’m 30 weeks on Thursday, it seems the last few weeks went by really fast. My mat leave starts 2 weeks before my due date but I’m already struggling. We started our shopping but still have couple of big things to get like a cot and furniture. We also have a new floor thats needs to be done in the nursery (hopefully by the end of next month). It’s our second but we didn’t keep anything after first one was born over 10 years ago.

I have some complications and I’ve been told that I won’t be going past my due date. I have my scans and consultant appointments every 2-3 weeks and they keep monitoring me but I hope they won’t be inducing me any earlier than my due date.

@UNICORN1589 I work in a hospital & only had it once during the whole lockdown, just as we were coming out and masks came off and now. It's hit me like a ton of bricks but then I've been up and down all pregnancy with one thing after another. I wonder if after all the years of high stress and IVF my body is just old & decrepit. Mat leave at 35 weeks is sounding nice to me, I might have to review my date. I'm also planning on breast & pump but no idea how easy/hard it's going to be.
We've got a lot of clothes already but still need a cot. No idea how many bottles etc we need and keep buying packs of nappies/some formula when we go shopping. Midwife reckons he's now on the 90th percentile so don't want to get too much newborn stuff.

@CandyRain89 hope you're coping ok with complications? Thank goodness you have extra monitoring. We are high risk but still only every 4 weeks with midwife/consultant and scans. Got my GTT this week which was postponed from last week and midwife and then Consultant again at 32. We are IVF so I don't think they will let me get to date either. Sending love to you all x

@CheeryPombearit’s a pain to remember all the medication I need to take and squeeze in all appointments with full time work. Work is great tho and recently they merged all my appointments so seeing one consultant instead of two. I don’t remember having as many hospital appointments last time I was but I guess some of the nhs guidelines changed over the years. Also with it being my second pregnancy I thought I will see my midwife less often but it seems I have the same amount appointments as my first. However as long as the baby is healthy I’m not complaining (well, trying not to lol).

Its good to hear that you have regular check and that baby is growing well 🥰 I hope your GTT goes well. sending love x

Just had a consultant appointment and baby is head down! I'm 27+4 today. Third trimester is so close! My consultant also confirmed he would be happy to induce around 38-39 weeks.

I've now had 2 GTT's and both have been normal but I suspect I'll have another after my 32 week growth scan because baby has been measuring big.

I finish work 5 weeks tomorrow. Using 4 weeks of annual leave to rest and get ready. My baby shower is in 4 weeks. It's all starting to get very real!

I am not enjoying the back pain and the waking up multiple times to usebthe bathroom but I'll take it. As long as baby is healthy, I'll take just about anything!

How is everyone else doing? Any tips for must have baby items or must have hospital bag items. Hospital bag packing has started, mainly toiletries for me, underwear, comfy clothes, a few baby outfits and nappies!

@emzlyz is baby engaged or just head down? Little Pombear is also head down but not engaged!

I had my GTT today, got an hour and half into it, started to feel unwell and collapsed in a heap..blood pressure of 62 apparently isn't very conducive to staying upright! Thankfully everything normalised after around 15.mins, had some tea and toast but not sure now whether this will affect my results. I also ended up having blood taken from the knuckle for the 2nd test as everything else had shut down (unsurprisingly).

I'm back at work on Monday after my Covid & UTI stint..got 2 weeks and then a week off then 5 weeks (maybe 4) and then I'm done.

@emzlyz extra long phone charger, headphones , handheld fan, a bottle of juice for the water … these were my top hospital bag items last time! Hopefully you won’t be in long and if you are you can always get items brought in. I’m packing 2 bags so I’ll just have a couple of days of items with me and the spare bag can just be swapped over.

@CheeryPombear hope you’re feeling ok now, I’m surprised they even finished the test. Surely they should try it again another day!

@CheeryPombear all my consultant said was she is head down. It wasn't an indepth scan, just a quick one to check everything on a very old scanner.

I hope you're feeling better. I was lucky that mine just made me tired. I went home sick after my test last week but I also had a cold and just wanted my bed. Fingers crossed it hasn't effected your results.

@emzlyz @Lorna198 thank you. I've had some food and a sleep, feel pretty rough but no worse. The knuckle has been knocked so I have a lovely bruise now. They said it happens at times due to fasting but this is what's been happening to me for a good few weeks on and off. I start to feel light headed, then hot and cold and sweaty and then my eyesight and hearing goes. I'm pretty impressed it dropped so low but also thankful I was in the right place. I don't think I would like to do it again, even if they suggest it. Luckily I used to work in the diabetes team so I might be able to convince them to let me have a glucose monitor if I ask very nicely.

Hello! I’m 31 weeks and your post resonated with me. I’m expecting twins and around 26 weeks I started getting the same symptoms as you after an infection (either Covid or tonsillitis- not entirely sure!) and I’ve got diagnosed as suspected POTs. Got the same symptoms as you, particularly the low blood pressure, eyesight loss and hearing issue, plus my heart rate goes through the roof when I stand up. I’ve been working on my resilience but at the start I was literally bed bound. Might be worth looking into?