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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Help please

58 replies

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 05:00

hi everyone I’m looking for some advice please as I’m freaking out
I had a bad feeling the other night that I couldn’t seem to shake , I had realised that me and my partner had split up once and I had made a big mistake and gone and slept with my ex boyfriend for one night it was around 1 am on the 16th July it was totally stupid and I regretted it ever since
I am currently 16 weeks and 6 days pregnant

It has just hit me like a tonne of bricks, I had done a conception calculation online and it said that I conceived on the 15th July based on my due date I’m pretty sure I was with my partner on this day but I’m not certain I’m very worried about this and I’m absolutely terrified that it isn’t my partners baby now just because of this one mistake I made i am now really unsure and worried I’m wondering if there’s anything you can do to help me figure out a more accurate estimate or something I don’t really understand all the information, on my Flo app it says day 1 of pregnancy is the 2nd July … I have looked online at DNA tests but they cost £800 + I just can’t afford it I’m absolutely beside myself here I do have dates of when I slept with my partner as I use the Flo app and I logged the unprotected sex and it was quite often I am 95% sure that my baby is his but I’m just very worried about that one mistake I made .
i think I was ovulating around the 8th July -14th July which is when I slept with my partner,

the other guy I slept with was 2 days before my period was due

any help will be appreciated thank you so much

OP posts:
Ilovebees · 27/10/2024 06:42

@Chloe1245678 hey , sorry you’re in this situation! But if you slept with your ex 2 days before you period was due ,there is no way this can be his child , when did you take your pregnancy test when you period didn’t show up ? Was it 2 days after you had sex with your ex ? And it was positive already ??

Ilovebees · 27/10/2024 06:44

@Chloe1245678 can you go back on your flow app and write down on here when was your last period and when you should of started your next one if you wasn’t pregnant and when you had sex with your ex , that would be helpful .

sel2223 · 27/10/2024 07:02

If you work back from your due date and count 38 weeks, that will give you the approximate date when you conceived - it's more accurate than using your LMP.

It's not exact though as sperm can live inside your body for several days plus scans can be a few days out either way but it'll give you an idea.

If it's really close and there was only a couple of days between your partner and your ex, then the only way you'll ever know is with a DNA test I'm afraid.

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 12:43

My last period was the 23rd June and it started 18th June so it should of started on the 18th July I slept with my ex two days before the 18th but my period didn’t arrive so I’m assuming I’m pregnant with my partners baby as I slept with him loads of times when I was supposed to be ovulating I think …

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 12:46

My last period was the 23rd June and it started 18th June so it should of started on the 18th July I slept with my ex two days before the 18th but my period didn’t arrive so I’m assuming I’m pregnant with my partners baby as I slept with him loads of times when I was supposed to be ovulating I think …

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 12:52

My last period was the 23rd June and it started 18th June so it should of started on the 18th July I slept with my ex two days before the 18th the 16th but my period didn’t arrive so I’m assuming I’m pregnant with my partners baby as I slept with him loads of times when I was supposed to be ovulating I slept with him at least 10 times prior to sleeping with my ex …

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 13:05

I have just checked and 4 weeks from the 18th June is 16th July my period should have started that day then is that right ?

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 13:13

I took a pregnancy test on the 22nd June it was negative it came positive on August 17th but I’ve just looked and 4 weeks from the 18th June is the 16th July that’s when my period was meant to start I’m pretty sure , and that’s the day I slept with my ex so it can’t be his , also I remember having some implantation bleeding I think

OP posts:
sel2223 · 27/10/2024 13:39

What is your due date?

Are your cycles always exactly 28 days long?

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:01

Due date is April 7th and yes they are always 28 days long I have checked my flo app for cycle length and it shows 28 days

OP posts:
sel2223 · 27/10/2024 14:37

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:01

Due date is April 7th and yes they are always 28 days long I have checked my flo app for cycle length and it shows 28 days

That due date does suggest you conceived on 15th July but could be a couple of days either side.

You can't rule out that you just ovulated late that cycle, which happens to all women from time to time.

Sorry as I know that doesn't help rule out your ex

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:40

I think it is my partners baby as I slept with him when I was ovulating and my period didn’t arrive on that day so I must of already been pregnant I’m 17 weeks tomorrow

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:49

I slept with my partner 12 times before conception date 4 or 5 of these days was when I was ovulating

OP posts:
Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:50

I slept with my partner 12 times before conception date 4 or 5 of these days was when I was ovulating

OP posts:
sel2223 · 27/10/2024 14:51

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:40

I think it is my partners baby as I slept with him when I was ovulating and my period didn’t arrive on that day so I must of already been pregnant I’m 17 weeks tomorrow

I hope you're right as that is obviously your preferred outcome but there is no way you can rule out your ex without a dna test, I'm afraid.

If your due date suggests 15th, and you slept with partner on 14th and ex on 16th that's honestly far too close to call without any doubt .

I'm not trying to be negative, just honest. Our bodies don't always ovulate exactly when a phone app tells us it will and a day or 2 in your case would make a massive difference. Unless you were physically tracking ovulation you just don't know.

Mrsttcno1 · 27/10/2024 14:52

Based on your due date you conceived between 13th and 17th of July.

Mrsttcno1 · 27/10/2024 14:56

Given your due date it could be either of their baby, there’s absolutely no way of knowing other than a DNA test.

sel2223 · 27/10/2024 14:56

Also it's extremely unlikely you conceived a day or 2 before your period, it's normally more like 10-14 days before.

If you conceived around mid July, your period was not going to come on 16th July that month for whatever reason so your cycle must have been long that month which means your ovulation dates could be wrong too as you generally ovulate in the middle of a cycle.

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:58

I’m just going to talk to my midwife about this tomorrow

OP posts:
sel2223 · 27/10/2024 15:00

Sorry we're not telling you what you want to hear OP. Your midwife will tell you the same.
You're going to need a DNA test to know for sure.

Mrsttcno1 · 27/10/2024 15:00

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 14:58

I’m just going to talk to my midwife about this tomorrow

There’s nothing your midwife can do to confirm it either OP. Based on your due date either man could be the father, the only way to know is to do a DNA test.

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 15:01

Yes I understand this which is why I think it’s my partners baby as we had slept together unprotected from the 29th June until the 15th

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 27/10/2024 15:02

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 15:01

Yes I understand this which is why I think it’s my partners baby as we had slept together unprotected from the 29th June until the 15th

It doesn’t matter when you had sex, what matters is when you ovulated. I could have sex with my husband 29 days a month, but have sex with another man on the day of ovulation, the other man would be the father of my child.

Based on your due date you slept with both men during the window where ovulation occurred, so it could be either.

sel2223 · 27/10/2024 15:03

Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 15:01

Yes I understand this which is why I think it’s my partners baby as we had slept together unprotected from the 29th June until the 15th

I think that's you trying to convince yourself OP, sorry.
With your dates, there is literally NO WAY you can know for sure without a DNA test.
Either man could be the father.
Do they both know this is a possibility?

Original poster
Chloe1245678 · 27/10/2024 15:04

But I wasn’t ovulating on the 16th of July I was due my period then and i remember having some implantation bleeding before then

OP posts: