I wake up every morning thinking I want an abortion.

[noirmum]

I think I’m about to be 8 weeks but I’m not 100% sure until I get a private scan in 2 days. Every single day when I wake up and feel nauseous and whenever I try eat anything until about the 20th mouthful I feel it coming back up in a horrible way but I know it won’t come back up which is torturing me the most. I’m 18 years old and I was so excited for a few weeks about my pregnancy until morning sickness hit. Day 1 I was nauseous from early morning to late late night to the point I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t lay down because I had to get up because of how sick I felt. It went on for a few days then disappeared. Me and my fiancé now sleep on the couch together so I can sit up straight and also lay down and I love him for how caring and supportive he is so far. As this is his child too having an abortion is a conversation we both have and I find it’s become daily. I can tell he’s sick of it but from being healthy and active to being in bed sleeping during the day and eating my first meal past 4pm because of the sleep I can’t get at night it’s a big change and a nightmare. I have emetophobia a fear of throwing up which is making these few weeks terrifying. My fiancé is in the military and works 12 hour shifts 4 times a week so I’m alone in the house dealing with it alone and his work give no care about it whatsoever. In those 12 hours he’s on shift for 4 hours of it which I think is terrible. The person who deals with it has a kid with her boyfriend who’s also in the military so she’s bias and can take him off when she wants but not my fiancé when he just wants to look after me during this horrible time. I know I don’t want an abortion at all but there’s times where I’m literally crying to my fiancé saying I can’t take it anymore telling him how much I want to sleep and be able to eat food again. How much I want to go out to museums and castles again. Thinking pregnancy literally makes you bloom I fell into it and now I’m trapped knowing I will never mentally recover no matter what I do. Thinking of abortion daily because of my sickness is horrible. Has anyone else experience this type of mental breakdown?

If it's just the sickness then you need to get medical help for it. It can be fixed

If you don't want the baby then that's a conversation between you

I'm sorry you're so poorly.
Are you sure you're ready for parenthood? 18 is very young. There is still plenty of time to terminate if you think that is best.
It is completely normal for your fiancé to be expected to work - he can't have time off because you feel ill.
When I went through morning sickness I also had to work 10 hour shifts and during the 2nd pregnancy I also had a young toddler to look after. I know it's tough but it is part of it for a lot of women.
I suggest you speak to a midwife or health visitor about how you're feeling. I mean this as nicely as possible - even severe morning sickness shouldn't be enough to cause permanent trauma and plenty of elements of parenthood can be proudly more challenging. That's why I worry you might not be ready.

*profoundly, not proudly!

Speak to midwife about sickness- there are meds that can help. Morning sickness is a combination of hormones and your body adjusting to them.

But if you want a termination that’s an option too.

Your fella can’t take a day off because you’re poorly that’s not how the world of work is. At 18 you probably think he should be able to but if he did he would risk losing his job.

Fucking hell.

She's 18, not a child.

Many, many women, with severe morning sickness, including those in their 30s and 40s will terminate because of the nightmare of the situation. Do you also think they aren't ready for parenthood.

I honestly can't believe you.

OP, go to your GP. There are safe medications that can help with this. It's a recognised medical condition called Hyperememis Gravidarium. You are also able to get hospital treatment if you become too unwell with dehydration. Princess Catherine is a well known sufferer too so you're in good company.

Sorry you're feeling unwell, morning sickness is the pits.

Your GP can prescribe anti nausea medication. It was life changing in my pregnancies.

Have you got any other support aside from your fiancé?

You will have to sacrifice your sleep and freedom for a long time if you have this baby so have a serious think if you're ready for that.

Have a look at the charity "pregnancy sickness support"

Phone the GP on Monday and ask for some anti sickness medications. There are lots of different ones to try. Don't despair if they don't help straight away, some take a week or so to kick in. Equally don't be afraid to go back to the GP and ask for something else.

I had a termination due to severe morning sickness. The other poster saying you must be immature to be considering one due to nausea is absolutely clueless and should be ashamed of herself.

If this is an otherwise wanted baby then get as much help, medication and rest as you can. If you do decide on a termination BPAS and Marie Stopes are good places to contact.

Sickness jn pregnancy is pretty normal..yes it’s shit but you just have to get on with it. I had sickness all the way through and terrible acid reflux but it never made me think about having an abortion. If you are thinking about an abortion because of that you need to seriously consider if you’re ready to be a parent.

Ignore the above advise.
It very much sounds like you have Hypermesis Gravidarum which is a severe form of morning sickness, the worst of it being for most mothers to be it goes on far longer than the usual 1st trimester and can be extremely debilitating

You are not alone in wanting a termination in these circumstances and it has no relation to your age. Do what is right for you.

Make a GP appointment first thing to discuss mediation but if that doesn't help do not feel guilty if you do decide a termination is the right option for you.

Wishing you the best OP

Only you really know the answer, but first step as PPs have said would be contacting the GP for some medication. No need to suffer in silence - there are plenty of things that may take the edge off. Hope things get better for you.

Absolute assholes on this thread.
HG is a real medical condition that makes life hell for the sufferers and can cause medical emergencies.
Many women, of all ages, will consider termination to stop the unrelenting sickness, even women that have had fertility treatment. HG is that bad!

https://www.kcl.ac.uk/news/women-terminate-wanted-pregnancies-due-to-hyperemesis-gravidarum

Op, people commenting that you're not ready to be a mum if you can't cope with sickness are not only unhelpful, they have not had sickness bad enough to know what it feels like.

There are women who terminate because of the sickness so yes, it can be that bad.

Please see your GP and explain how you're feeling. There are medications that can help, you sometimes have to try a few before finding the right one.

Join the hyperemesis thread on here because even if you don't feel that's what you have, it's a lovely supportive thread with lots of useful advice and can make you feel less alone.

You've every clearly never had hyperemesis if you think nausea can't be bad enough to make you want to terminate.

OP, I'm sorry it's so hard right now. Definitely contact your GP/family doctor to get yourself some treatment so you can make the right choice for you.

Choosing abortion because you are sick is a perfectly valid reason, you can have one for any reason.

If you do go on in the future to try for children make sure you research the ways you can try and cope with thus sickness, not every medicine works and unfortunately you could be this ill for the rest of the entire pregnancy.

Good luck.

Every minute that passes is one more towards the end.

There was one day at maybe 16-18 weeks when I got up and did some washing up and while I was standing at the sink I didn’t feel sick. I was soooo happy that day and it sticks in my mind even now.

Id understand completely if you did decide to terminate because of it, but equally you will get through this if you do decide to keep the baby.

Ah OP, I feel for you. I had horrific morning sickness during pregnancy. My MH collapsed as well. I was an absolute mess. When the sickness started to resolve around week 22, my mental health sorted itself out. It was like flicking light switch.

It's so hard and I don't have a huge amount of advice. Just don't stress about not eating, and if you get a few minutes break from the sickness, get whatever food you fancy down your neck, even if it's absolute junk! Personally I found that fizzy drinks and spicy food helped, it was like they gave my stomach a distraction from feeling sick! I know that goes against all the advice that you will read, but whatever, it helped me.

Please go to your dr and or call midwife. I've had a close friend with terrible morning sickness and I didn't realise how bad it can be. If this is a wanted baby see if the meds help.
You sound really strong and that your trying to fight through it and your partner sounds lovely in trying to support you.
Can't believe the horrible things ppl have suggested on this thread please ignore them!! Having a baby us hard and a challenge if your 18, 28 or 38 like me! I've learnt some amazing tips amd had words of help from much younger mums.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/4851480-hyperemesis-support?page=11

I'm not sure if this is the most recent thread

Definitely seek help for sickness OP 💛 GP or midwife- I'm sure there is meds
I've been super nauseas this pregnancy & it's completely knocked me so I can only imagine how you are feeling actually being physically sick as much, please know as others have said you are not alone & how you feel is absolutely valid

It's a womans right to abort, no matter the reason! Your body, your choice please do not let ignorant comments get to you!
Being pregnant alters your life in so many different ways & it can wreck havoc on your mental state!
Big big love to you 💖

👍🏼

I have hyperemesis and it's awful. I'm 38 with two other children and the thought of termination has crossed my mind in this and my last pregnancy (wasn't as bad with my first). I also have to work and between being sick and wanting to sleep it's a tough ride.

Anti sickness tablets do help somewhat, I found some safe foods (instant noodles and salt and vinegar crisps...oh so healthy)
I'm 17 weeks and while it's getting better I know I still have another month of it and it's horrible. Make sure you're prepared this might get better at 12 weeks but it might not. It's one of the unspoken horrors, and it is a horror, of pregnancy.

I hope you get some relief soon and that you have a lot of supportive people around you, whatever you decide to do.

Get some meds, I had HG, I found they stopped me puking but didn’t help with nausea, but it meant I wasn’t dehydrated. It was frankly fucking miserable and I cried everyday for most of my pregnancy because I felt foul all the time, every single waking second. You aren’t alone, there are many of us who have had the same experience x

If you want an abortion that is also perfectly fine, you have a right to choose ok regardless of what anyone else thinks. Be aware though if you choose to get pregnant again there is a high liklihood it will happen again. Do not have an abortion because of your fiancée, only have one if you really don’t want to be pregnant x I wish you luck and I hope you are better soon x