Due July 2024 - part 5

[Oatmilktea]

Starting a new thread as the old one is filling up.

Many of our July babies have already arrived, hopefully the rest make their arrival soon 🩵🩷

Thanks for making new thread ❤️

Thank you for the new thread ❤️
Can't believe little one is nearly 3 weeks old now. He's still not lost his cord though which is a bit worrying. Doesn't seem infected or anything but just won't fall off!

Mine lost his cord on Saturday! Yuck! A few people asked if I was going to keep it. Er, no, it went in the bin. I kept the clamp though! After I figured out how to open it, it did get put in the bin along with the cord at first. 😅 Then I fished it out, opened it and gave it a good wash.
Feeling knackered, I'm going home home tomorrow after being at my friend's house for a week. Last night of her helping before I'm on my own with little one. 🥺 I don't know how I'm going to cope, but cope I must.

Thanks for the new thread. 3 weeks on Thursday and my almost 13lb'er at birth is wearing 6-9 month clothes!

My let down seems to be too powerful for the big little man which is causing him to get trapped wind and lots of tears. I'm hoping that will pass. Not sure who can give me advice on that? Will consult Doctor Search Engine but any advice would be appreciated.

Had a longer walk today and feel like a heavy stone impaled onto the bed now. Think tomorrow will be a 'take it easy' day. Been out 3 times now since my section. Definitely finding the recovery taking longer this time. I've been feeling fragile, my lower back has been very painful. How are others doing post cesarean? Any bodily ailments or are you feeling stronger already?

@Cherubs4 6 to 9 months already...blimey! Mine has just got back to her birth weight of 6 11 and is still in newborn 😁
My c section recovery isn't going too badly touchwood! Two weeks in and I can do 15-20 minute walks (haven't tried further) and apart from getting up from the sofa with baby, I can do most things. The main side effects I appear to have are trapped wind and my scar is starting to itch!
Have you tried infacol for the wind? Mine is a windy little beast and it seems to assist it through her system if her sharts are anything to go by! 😆

@Cherubs4 I've been getting stabbing pains around my c section incision, which only started today.
I think you win the thread for biggest baby. 🏆 I thought mine was a beast and isn't going to last long in 0-3 months clothes!

@Cherubs4 holy moly 6-9 months is big! lol 13lbs is almost double little Bella’s size lol. She is very much in newborn still, 0-1m swamp her but aren’t as big on her as they were. So hoping she is getting back up to birth weight!

we had a lot of fun last night, was changing her wet nappy and said to DH that she had done a stinky fart. Only to be immediately hosed with poo! Went all over me, her, the changing mat and sofa! It just didn’t stop coming! Had to get the spare changing mat out, which she also covered. Finally got her clean and she went for a wee covering herself in that. All building up to the grand finale of a big puke! I couldn’t stop laughing as we were cleaning her up! That’s my girl, if you’re gonna do it, give it everything you got!

Morning Mamas. Still pregnant. 41w 1d. I think I will be having a August baby at this rate 😂😭

@missmoosh omg no way! Had she not gone for a while. I would close the nappy right back up and wait 😂 or whisk.baby to the toilet and hold over it EC.

@Cherubs4 omg 13lbs! Already. Feeding very well and stocking up.

@MixedCouple2 oh wow, what a trooper being so heavily pregnant in this heat. How are you coping? Are you getting impatient?

@Cherubs4 wow, what a lovely big baby 🥰.

@missmoosh sounds like something out a comedy sketch 😂 bless her! My baby had his first ever projectile vomit the other day, he and I were covered and so was the couch. I wondered to myself what the hell we would do if it happened if we were out and about. Imagine your baby done that when out and about 😂

@Cherubs4 for the powerful letdown, try hand expressing a little bit before the feed, or even pumping for 1-2 mins. I also sometimes unlatch baby and catch the letdown with a muslin, and then continue feeding.

Hahaha I’m so glad it didn’t happen whilst out! Well the first poo just shot out, by that point poo everywhere lol. We put another nappy over and every time we thought it was over she would go again lol! it was a very funny experience 😂 always pack a change of clothes is the advice I have been given! Though i have forgot this the last few days!

At least you were prepared with the second nappy over her 😂. Following the sick incident changing bag has 2 or 3 changes of clothes just in case 😂. My baby’s party trick is filling a fresh nappy moments after it has been put on so I take about 10 nappies too!

Thank you for the new thread.

Hi everyone,
Sort of reposting from the previous thread, as suggested, looking for advice.

Yesterday, DH came home late from work, as he usually does around the end of the month. I needed help from DH in the middle of the night and I woke him up around midnight, he was very groggy and it look me 7 tries to get him to wake up, after which we had an argument and he went back to bed. I took care of the baby from 11pm-3am, after which DS finally fell asleep.
Because of the way DH behaved, I had a feeling he was drunk and I checked his phone. Sure enough, he had gone out drinking and lied about it saying he was at work.
I went through more of his texts. Not individual chats, but I searched "drink" and one of the messages from him were "it's been 10 days since I drank or smoked" which seemed like a joke to me because smoking is a huge deal breaker to me. It's the only thing I cannot tolerate due to my allergies and I have no issues with anyone else smoking, just not in my house. With drinking, I've never had an issue. But he told me he wouldn't drink since he had to be up at night for the baby so the fact that he lied and went to do it was unnecessary because I never restricted him from drinking.

With the smoking I assumed it was a one off because never in a million years would I have imagined he would smoke. I've known him since we were in university and it's been about 14 years.

I then searched "cigarette " and saw texts dating as far as 2019. Which means he has been smoking for 5 years (or more) and he has been lying about it to me.

This is a huge betrayal of my trust and I confronted him at 4 am because I just couldn't take it.

I gave him a chance to tell me the truth. I asked him when the last time he drank was and I said please just tell me the truth, don't lie. He said it was on his birthday (june 19th). I showed him texts that showed he drank yesterday and a week before. And a few times after june 19th.

I need advice on how to proceed with this. I really haven't dealt with something like this. I don't know how to take it or get past it. It's the lying that gets me. If he was struggling with smoking he could've just talked to me about it. Yes, I'm against it but I would've helped him quit.
I even thought about divorce this morning.

@MixedCouple2
Thank you.

I wouldn't say he drinks excessively. As far as I know it's once a week probably, but what do I know. Like I said, I don't have an issue with the drinking. It's the fact that he lied, and left me to take care of the baby alone, snapped at me when I asked him.
We went through fertility treatments to get pregnant so he knows how smoking could've messed that up. He tells me he didn't smoke during that period but I don't know what to believe. If he stopped during the treatment for 5-6 months, why pick it up again?

I'm sorry that you're going through that. I think men can really neglect themselves sometimes and I wish they wouldn't. Maybe we care too much too.

I do have help, my mum and mil stay with us. But DH and I take care of him at night and honestly even during the day he's always with me. Which is fine, I don't mind, it's just all the lying I can't get past.

@ceruleansky I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through this, especially the lying. No advice in particular, except maybe to avoid making any major decisions until the newborn brain fog has lifted! Sending solidarity though, and a hug.

@Cherubs4 leaning back feeding with baby resting on your chest. There are loads of tips on Youtube from IBCLC about positions for a slow release. But leaning back comfy on the sofa or bed with baby on top is the best.

@Oatmilktea yesterday was horrid! I was in a foul mood all day! But today cooled down and I am staying indoors and relaxing.
DS1 never vomited maybe once or twice as a baby. But he uad loads of poonamies up his back and everywhere else! Lucky to never have it on me 😂 I always stand bwside him when changing and not at the end 😂
Change of clithes for Baby and Mama yes! And lots of wet wipes and bin bags!

@ceruleansky has he had any trauma recently in the last couple years? I would try discuss when things are calm and emotions are not heightened. As you have DM anr MIL you could hand baby over while you and your partner go for a walk / go for a drive and have a chat 1-1 when he is free?
Maybe he will have a good excuse snd maybe this will help him to kick start quitting.
All the best with it though x

I have had lots of bloody show this morning and MP. This was after last night when DH did acupressure on my feet I felt a change after. Even the itching went away from the ICP. My cervix and down below felt different and today feels the same, very different.
Trying to book a reflexology apt I left it a bit late but found a good one who has loads of positive reviews for helping induce labour within hours!
Got my Midwivea brew ready for later as well. I feel my body is in a place where oy will be more receptive to alternative methods - hopefully.

Thanks for creating new page ❤️

@ceruleansky just read your post. I’m really sorry you’re dealing with this during a vulnerable time. I want to offer more advise but I fear it would be wrong. Hubs and I bicker like cats and dogs (just the nature of our 13 year relationship, we met super young) and I do know that he also neglects himself when he’s stressed and gets super grumpy and retreats. I’ve finally realised he does this because he feels he’s ‘failed’. Which of course isn’t true but feelings are always valid.
how are you feeling today?

Im in the newborn trenches. I’m actually enjoying it but I do feel super clueless 🫢 having to race to pump due to tongue tie so awaiting appointment for that.
Other than tongue tie, I feel I’m not coping well with the section recovery - feeling like I’m not ‘better’ soon enough but need to give myself a break. Anyone else?

Sending good vibes to ladies trying to go into labour and everyone in the newborn weeks 💪💗💗

@ceruleansky that sounds an awful situation to be in - especially when you're in the newborn trenches. I'm really sorry I don't have any advice to offer but sending lots of love and hope someone on here or in your personal life can offer some help.

@Jess725 I didn't have a c-section this time but definitely sympathise with the feeling of not healing quickly enough. I'm 3 weeks post-birth and my episiotomy scar is only just starting to feel better but the skin around it still feels quite tight and swollen. Trying to be gentle to myself but it is hard!

@ceruleansky is so sorry to hear what you are going through. The only advice I can offer is to remember your both currently sleep deprived and have massive changes to your day to day life with a baby and also your hormones. So I would say as above don’t make any hasty decisions but do have a heart to heart when you are both in a place/mental state to deal with a difficult discussion. Be open and honest with how you feel but also allow the same space for him, sometimes it can be hard to hear others feelings especially for things that may have caused him to not tell you in the first place ❤️ sending you best wishes and hope you can get it all sorted

I haven’t posted in ages but have been reading along! My baby came last week at 41+4, an induction and a bit of a traumatic birth but we’re okay, at home and working out this new life with a newborn! Hope you’re all okay and those who are still waiting meet your babies soon.

Hope you’re all surviving in this heat post partum sweats and high temperatures aren’t the one!

Thanks, everyone, for your responses. I think the common comment I see is to not make any hasty decisions. You're all probably right. I will take some time to think about it and see how he's willing to change. Thanks.

@MixedCouple2
I asked him what triggered him to smoke and he said it was his boss at one of his previous jobs who really abused him verbally and treated him like crap.
If it were me, i would have recorded the boss's words on a call and sent it over to HR. I suppose his response was to start smoking. This was in 2019. I did hand over the baby yesterday to them. I just couldn't handle anything.
Some time in June, I caught him after he said he was at work but he was actually out drinking. So this has already happened and he already knows how i feel about the lying. There's really no reason to lie. Anyway, it's okay. I'll figure it out. Thanks for your kind words. 🩷

Bloody show is definitely a good sign. I hope you see some other labour signs soon!!

@ceruleansky aaaaah I see. So that is a pretty horrid thing to happen. But as you said why not discuss with you? Your both open and communicate. I understand sometimes men like to deal with things internally alone. But this is a habit which as you stated is unsafe for him giving his health issues. I guess you had a chat. I hope your both able to work through it together amd he can get some support to wait the smoking.
Glad you have the support there with baby. That helps massively.

Thank you. Had more MP with Bloody show this morning and tonight had the Midowves Brew this evening and my stomach feels so full it was well over 500mls of basically a smoothies 😂
Having very mipd contractions after the acupressure DH die for me yesterday and today.

Question for the group! I am formula feeding little one, breasts are no longer engorged and feel normal, but my left nipple is getting sharp pains in it on and off, it’s really painful. I don’t think it’s mastitis as I have no lumps, hard spots or hot patches. So not sure what’s going on…any ideas? I will try and call gp in the morning but ouchies! It hurts to be touched when it’s having its moment!