How old is too old?

[queenofmums]

Would you say there is an age limit of having children?

I'm sure you are healthy but the fact is, your eggs are old. It doesn't matter how physically healthy you are, most of your eggs will have deteriorated in quality and be abnormal now. That's something I read when my 44 year old friend was trying for a baby.

But you've already got ten. Do you suppose those of us with one, two, or three kids find family any less important than you?

I think you'd be absolutely stark raving mad to have any more and it has nothing to do with your age.

I think that's down to personal preference and how the specific family and household run. I don't think u can categorise a situation being similar to another. The parents are different, the children, the finances etc

For me, 36+ is too old. I personally know women who’ve had babies well into their 40s and one entirely naturally at 52. All fine. No one can really tell you.

Literally no one can give 10 children equal amounts of love and care. It would be physically impossible.

I have 8 at home... and come a certain age and maturity, the older ones tend to want more time with their friends etc

Your body will tell you when you're too old.

And I beg to differ on giving equal amounts of love etc!

You’ve still got a limited amount of hours in a day and having 10 children at very different stages means the chances of missing something due to lack of attention is quite high.

👍

I doubt this is real, but what an odd question!

“A US family who chooses to have one fewer child would provide the same level of emissions reductions as 684 teenagers who choose to adopt comprehensive recycling for the rest of their lives” (Mortimer, 2017).

You must accept the kids don’t get as much 1-1 time as they would if there were less of them though? So obviously adding another baby, who is far more likely to have additional needs due to your age, will dilute your time further

Yeah I've always found parents of big families think their teens can fend for themselves. I always assume those parents are only really interested in parenting babies and young children, hence the need to keep having endless babies when the next one up gets older.

Certainly how I felt, as another sibling as part of a big family (7 kids), and another one who consequently will be stopping at 2.

I've got 4 soon to be 5. I found I dealt with pregnancy brilliant in early 20s now I'm 30 and this one has knackered me. Defo not having more after this. My mum had her last at 47 and she's fine.

Well, Mother Teresa never had any, if that helps.

Although, of course, priests will never divulge what is said during a confession... (a bit like a member of the mafia, I suppose.)

That's not to mention the environmental impact of so many kids. It's just totally and utterly unnecessary however you want to dress it up.

What are you on about?

I'm kind of thinking... people are being judgemental.. how on earth can anyone comprehend or advise someone that has 10 children, if they've not been in that position themselves? 🤔 thanks anyway all x

Because some of us have been the children, so we are looking at it from their perspective.

You’ve brought your situation to mumsnet. If you didn’t want peoples thoughts, don’t ask.

Biologically it’s whenever a woman can no longer conceive.

Socially right now it seems 30-40 is the ‘ideal’ age.

Personally my limit is 35. I had one at 26 and one at 30.

Well some of it is common sense, science, general facts. You obviously don’t want to hear it though which is fine, sounds like this has helped you make your mind up anyway. Good luck OP

I vote go for it. But l had twins at 43 🤣. No one has mistaken me for their grandmother as far as l am aware. My husband and l seem to be wearing well. Are also quite healthy and active. Lots of long living people in our families -our children’s great grandmother is still alive

The issue is not the OP's age it's the number of kids she's already got.

Thanks.
I don't have close family and friends myself... so thought I would give MN a try. Its not that I don't want to hear it... its more; who wants to be judged... which is what I said about. I guess if u don't personally know me, my situation, my kids, family etc... you are just going to judge on an age thing!