💙🩷From Bumps 2 Babies & Beyond!🤰👶🍼🤱🤱

[MummyTo4BoysXXXX]

following on from the Due February 2024 thread 7.. now this shall be thread 8! For us all to continue our pregnancy&postpartum journey together 😊

I'm so sorry you've had to deal with that @Cheetocat it sounds awful. Hope seeing the psychiatrist is helpful for you x

How are everyone's babies bowel movements? My girl hasn't pooped in 48h and she is super gassy / unsettled at night. Lots of farts and fussing from 8pm until the morning. She usually has one huge poo per day.

Plenty of wet nappies and she's generally quite happy during the day, eating as normal etc.
Not sure if I should be concerned? Planning to wait until the morning before contacting HV if she still hasn't pooped.

Those who have had a csection recently, have you noticed any issues with weeing? I’m 10 days post op and still don’t really get the urge to urinate and when I do go I occasionally get a weird pressure pain at the end. It feels different to a UTI. I mentioned it to a midwife last week and she said it can be bruising from the op and the catheter but to keep an eye on it. Just wondered if anyone has similar?

Anyone else struggling with ‘baby blues’? I don’t know if that’s what I’m experiencing but the last 2/3 days I’ve just felt so emotionally fragile, everything makes me cry and I’ve become hyper sensitive. I’m stressed about feeds even though baby’s weight is good and she seems happy and healthy, just wish formular want needed. It’s not even top ups at this point and more combi because I don’t trust that my breasts are filling for her. I’ve lost trust in my ability to take care of her needs and I feel guilty that it’s consuming me to the point that I can’t enjoy time with her. Also frustrated that the birth so far removed from what I hoped for and now my hopes for exclusively breastfeeding have gone out of the window too.

I know this is all probably hormones but I just feel quite sad and don’t know how to get out of this head space

@msp2023 try giving baby some cool boiled water, that helped my little one when he hadn't pooed in 24 hours. He is a lot like your little one, very gassy at night.
I also use infacol cos it's the only thing which helps him just that little bit to pass his wind, he does get cranky though before he farts.

& @CalFairy I didn't have a c section but I did have a tear and I still struggle after 14 days to still feel the need to wee and get the same strange feeling after.

We've started using infacol and it's helped massively for her gas.
She's also been able to poo, not sure if linked.

@Ebonythoughts I am just getting through very similar emotions to yours. So happy with my little one but so so guilty and disappointed that I haven't managed to EBF and seeming unlikely that I will. Just keep envisioning how much harder it is to take trips, holidays etc with bottles. Plus, feel sad that the bonding experience has been taken away from us. Trying to breastfeed currently is stressful and exhausting as she gets worked up and hangry when trying to latch.

I know 'fed is best' but this doesn't take mums emotions into account! Just take it day by day, speak to loved ones about how you're feeling and hopefully they can provide you with more comfort.

I soak in every single cuddle and look, whether that's over the boob or the bottle and remind myself that in a few years time, we'll look back and none of this will matter. As long as they are happy and healthy - we are doing all we can x

@CheeseAndCrackersx @Sunshineclouds11
Thank you both. I did just get some infacol today so will try it if the night is as bad as the last few!

I am so poorly! I think it’s mastitis. I’ve been fine all day until 6.30 tonight when I feel like I’ve suddenly been hit by a brick!! Mad fever going on and my left boob is SO painful. I’m either shivering uncontrollably or sweating like a mad women. My whole body is aching and I’ve had a cry! I’ve fed babe as usual and he seems fine but I can’t help but worry now that he might get ill 😭

🙌🏻 following!

@Ebonythoughts yes! (You were my due date twinny I believe as well) the baby blues has been horrible 😢 I have good times and bad times sometimes the anxiety is so strong it makes me feel physically faint

I had quite the experience with my birth and also first bonding/feeding experience I might briefly describe it to see what you guys think a lot happened so I don’t want to write an essay lol

babies heart rate dropped, wanted a c section because it was horrid and traumatic as I had a previous loss. Ended up spur of the moment getting my waters broken instead. Baby heart rate dropped again when pushing, emergency called in they started prepping me for theatre. Amazing consultant said no I’m doing forceps right here right now; had an episiotomy, lost a litre of blood was quite delirious.

after everyone left the midwife we had from start to finish, who I thought wasn’t very compassionate from the beginning, brought her over to my chest to try breastfeeding. Them begin to criticise what I was doing like saying your holding her wrong your doing this wrong that wrong, you’re getting too hot, she’s stressed, your stressed (bare in mind I was still delirious and at this point I felt I was gonna puke my organs up) husband came back in the room midwife asked if we had pre made bottles. She then took the bottle from my husband and just fed her herself!

anyway this is very brief but I feel she stole my first moment, she made me feel like I was incapable of looking after my baby and also ruined breastfeeding for me. When I was left on my own I got her to latch by myself! But by this point I thought I was doing everything wrong. After 5 days with no sleep and all this going on in the hospital I felt like I was on the verge of a total breakdown I felt like I couldn’t look after her and I couldn’t do anything right and even me touching her was causing her to become distressed.

things have gotten better since, especially when I caught up on sleep (legit think I was on the verge of psychosis or something) did anyone else have a negative first experience like this? Do any of you think I was wronged in this situation? Don’t expect responses tbh it’s just been nice to get it down in writing tbh

@Shrillwaffle I’m so so sorry this was ur experience and u we’re made to feel like this, it’s heart breaking to read ur message❤️ please know that u know ur baby best and what they need, that will never change. I do think it’s no harm letting the hospital know that that midwife made u feel like that as it’s such a terrible experience for a new mammy meeting their beautiful baby. You’ve been through so much, I hope ur feeling a bit better/more positive a little out from all that happening. How is ur little one now?

This is heartbreaking to read. I totally agree that the midwife's have such a huge influence on us.

I was told I was having an emergency c section at 4am then an hour later someone came back and said no I'm not, set me off on a spiral of stress and anxiety worried for the baby. My midwife really intimidated me and made me so flustered I nearly opted for a C-section as she made me feel inadequate. When she went on lunch I spoke to another midwife and ended up asking for mine to not come back as she was making me mentally frustrated. I felt awful towards her but needed to make that decision. I know I wouldn't of been able to do as well as I did with her there.

Our intuitions amaze me and I know there is a huge amount of struggles but we will all get through these stages, it's so amazing to have this learning journey with the baby which in itself is so remarkable x

@CharXo this definitely sounds like mastitis, it's awful. I had it multiple times with my first, some tips:
It won't hurt your baby and actually getting milk flowing/out is the best thing you can do so keep feeding or pumping as much as you can
Also hand express using heat to ease the blockage out, try in a hot shower or using hot water bottle
Use a wide tooth comb on your boob to help ease it out
If you've got a haaka, fill it with warm water and epsom salts and put it on your sore boob with nipple submerged, this worked wonders for me in getting lumps out
Take ibuprofen
Soya lecithin tablets can help (I'd get from Holland and Barrett)
If it's still as bad, contact doctor as you might need antibiotics

The only good news is it goes as quickly as it comes. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, hope some of these tips help

Thank you @Hankthehonk
I have woken up 5 times since I posted absolutely soaked in sweat. It really did come out of nowhere and now I feel absolutely awful.

@Shrillwaffle this is heartbreaking to read. I’m so sorry you had this experience 😔 how are you feeling now?

@Shrillwaffle I'm so so sorry you went through that. I think sometimes the midwives are so focused on the outcome for baby, they forget a bit that we are in huge pain, unbelievably stressed, exhausted after days in labour etc. As to them it's normal day to day events, but to us it's brand new, scary, and very traumatic.

I doubt she meant to make you feel like that, and there's nothing you did wrong. I imagine she was probably so focused on getting milk into baby, especially as the baby had had a distressed birth. But you should definitely say something about her delivery of it, not nice to make you feel so bad, and maybe it will make her think for next time.

I had a bit similar - induced, waiting for labour spot with no sleep, 1.5 days of labour, ending in emergency c section and 1.5 litres of blood lost. The epidural didn't work, so I had a spinal. All of it made me so sick and dizzy, I couldn't even bare to have baby put straight on me to feed. Have fed a baby before but felt so sick and dizzy, I couldn't get the baby in position, couldn't tilt myself up to feed etc. Asked my partner to take her away to do skin to skin. The midwives and my partner milked me while I lay there bleeding with no knickers on 🙈 still horribly embarrassed about that. But I felt too sick for hours to feed her myself. I was on the high dependency recovery ward and a lot of the ladies seemed to feel the same - too sick, numb and in pain to hold their babies for those first hours, and def not to feed them.

Please if you can don't worry about the first hours. You'll be a brilliant mum and they were just the first few hours of recovery. After your body had been through huge trauma. I don't feel bad about those few hours of my own birth/recovery now. My partner was there, he's capable of skin to skin and feeding. Baby was looked after and I'm very grateful is okay.

Hope you're okay xxxxx

@CharXo I think you could need antibiotics - if you've a fever tomorrow might be worth calling and checking. When I've had just blocked ducts before, I didn't have a fever. Hope you feel better, it's awful.

Re feeding, @Ebonythoughts and @msp2023 absolutely fed is best. A couple of friends saw private lactation consultants for an appointment or two and managed to get back to EBF. There were some herbs to boost milk supply, and a professional to evaluate if there was enough milk for the baby and how to tell etc. I'd never heard of this, but just mentioning in case you hadn't either, and were interested.

Yes I’ve had this, I’m 13 days post op. Have had two UTI tests both negative so likely trauma. My catheter was in for 18 hours. It’s slowly getting better, horrible though isn’t it.

I’ve tried to catch up on the thread and seen lots of questions about EBF overnight. My baby is 13 days and up until last night I’ve just been feeding on demand in the lying down position (where you are both lying next to each other and your body is in a C shape so if you drop off to sleep it is safe). She has been waking around every hour since birth and it was starting to get to me. My partner sleeps in another room so my baby and I have the full bed for safety and because for us there’s no point in us both being sleep deprived. This can be a great position to learn if you are exhausted, your partner can even watch you feed in the position to allow you to rest properly knowing that your baby is safe whilst you catch up on some sleep.

Last night I tried something different. I sat up and fed in cradle hold. Fed on one boob, winded and changed her to wake her up and then fed on the other boob and winded. The whole process took 40-60 minutes as she’s a slow feeder but then by some miracle she actually went in the moses basket for 90-150 minutes in between feeds and I got some periods of actual sleep.

I hope this helps and new mums to BF. She is my third and each baby has been different.

Whoops, she’s 14 days today 🙃

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 thank you! I did actually see a qualified lactation consultant. It was helpful in terms of knowing how much top up to give etc and have someone check latching. My issue is milk supply now so just trying to get that up with pumping, herbal supplements and latching as much as possible.
Exhausting but I want to give it my best possible shot!

Finally ordered a wrap carrier on vinted, hope I can get a bit more done around the house with it. I'm still less than three weeks post op but I feel fit as a fiddle, I am way more able bodied than when I was pregnant. I have to really remind myself not to overdo it which is a bit scary. Only thing that I'm scared of is slipping in the rain and the car seat belt. 🤣

Sorry for the random possibly simple question.
I didnt express or breast feed my now 12 year old dd but I'm expressing this time so it's all new to me.
I'm expressing 5 maybe 6 times a day which apparently isn't enough to sustain the supply when we get to 6 weeks but right now it's enough with 1 bottle of formula a day. I'm getting at least 3 oz mostly 4oz every time and he only drinks max 3oz a time.
If I continue to express and put a bottle in the fridge can I add the next lot of expressed milk in with it or do I need to keep it separate?
I nearly expressed 5oz earlier today and I don't want to waste it so just thinking ahead incase I keep getting more milk then he needs

Hopefully it makes sense!

Any tips with expressing will also be greatfully appreciated

@Hotpolarbear you can combine the milk when it's the same temperature. So once both have been in the fridge for 2-3 hours they'll be safe to mix!

@Cheetocat hi hope you don’t mind me asking what sling carrier did you go for I had a look and there is so many 🤦‍♀️ there was a chat way back but couldn’t remember what everyone was recommending lol x

I think it's a moby wrap. I was given a used ergobaby structured carrier that I'm excited to use but baby can't go in until he's 4 months old so I'll use a wrap until then, I might even like the wrap better!