Pregnancy After Miscarriage - Knicker Checkers Anonymous Part III

[lackaDAISYcal]

Hi everyone.....roll up here for your passport to check your knickers on an hourly basis

Sorry, that was a very down post wasn't it? Am not normally so gloomy - honestly!

Hello there Natalie, rubbish isn't it?! Totally know how you feel, but don't have any answers!

Actually, my acupuncture lady said last night that whenever I feel a negative thought come into my head, I should say to myself "I am happy and grateful to be pregnant, and my system is healthy and strong."

What do you guys reckon to things like that? I'm not hippy dippy by nature, but I can see how positive thoughts keep me calmer than negative ones.

It isn't taking the terror out of the loo visits, but I do think it might be helping a bit.

I think that sort of positive thinking could work after you have some sort of confirmation that things are going well, after a scan for example. It doesn't seem like anything is going to lift my mood till I have seen it for myself IYKWIM?

When are you due?

Yeah, know what you mean. I'm only 4+5, so I'm going to have to make do with positive thinking for a week or two until it's worth scanning!

I'll be 6 weeks on Friday, but MW can't book me in till 3rd June, so I'll already be 8 weeks by then, by the time they book me a scan, it isn't going to be much, if anything, before 12 weeks. Have thought about going down the private route to get a scan, but then I think even if we go and get a scan, that shows everything is OK on that day, I'll still be worrying about the next day, and the day after that etc. It doesn't seem worth it.

It would have helped if all of my symptoms hadn't blardy gone and dissapeared on me! I was counting on them getting me through to 12 weeks!

We'll be due around the same time then, fingers crossed

Is there an EPU near you? My GP referred me, not a midwife, though both times I was bleeding, so I think it's normal to refer in that case.

They might take into account the fact that you had a recent mc and are worried? I can see your point though that you'd prob still be worried afterwards anyway...

Yes, there is an EPU, but I don't really want to just turn up there, and GP won't refer unless there is an obvious problem.

I think I have resigned myself to just waiting it out, like I've said a scan isn't going to stop the worry for long, so it is just a case of getting on with it I think.

It is strange though how having a baby at the end of this seems much more real to me than the fact that, at the moment at least, I am pregnant. With both of my boys the baby never seemed real until they were born. It is all a bit odd how it manifests itself in your thoughts!

Welcome to the thread NatalieJane and congratulations on your pregnancy
The early weeks are extremely difficult once you've had a mc as you're constantly worrying whether something has gone wrong. Don't forget pregnancy symptoms can come and go so they're not necessarily a reliable indicator and 5 weeks is still very early for ms etc perhaps. I tried to get myself through the early stages by thinking that unless there was evidence to the contrary then everything was going to be OK (v. hard having had a mmc last time with lots of pg symptoms!) I did have an early scan at 7+3 and found it reassuring. It was enough to see me through until the 12 week scan anyway and everytime I felt negative I focused on the scan photo. Airing my fears on here helped a lot, as did reading other people's posts and realising that I wasn't alone.
I'm now finding the time between the 12 week and 20 week scan is dragging and feel like I'm in limbo (I'm 15+3) so it doesn't look like the worrying ever stops!
Keep posting and we'll do our best to get you through this early bit

Thanks Cricri Congrats on your pregnancy as well

Think I am going to have to start changing my thoughts deliberatly. I am really not used to feeling so down and grumpy, it is starting to annoy me now, how my poor DH is putting up with me I don't know!

Looking on the bright side, only another 35 weeks to go!

HI NATALIEJANE AND CONGRATULATIONS....oops sorry, DD was "helping" me type earlier by biting the edge of the laptop and must've hit caps lock

My ms symptoms have never really kicked in until about 7 or 8 weeks, adn things are so up and down with hormones doing different things that different symptoms do come and go. ikwym about the scan. We had a scan at 6 weeks with Dd due to bleeding, and it seemed an age tpo wait till my dating scan at 13 weeks. My MS went completely at 9wks so we paid for a private scan, and again, although all was well, I still worried till the next one. the worry kind of goes with the territory unfortunately, but that's what we're here for; to help you get over those emotional humps

trying; I like your thinking. There was a mantra on here from one of the graduates a while back along the lines of "healthy and well". We should resurrect it!

cricri, I'm so with you with the limbo thing. Still, I'm seeing the MW next week so should hear the babies heartbeat. That'll get me through to my 20 weeks scan I hope.

so, healthy and well thoughts to one and all

Good morning

Thanks Lacka, congratulations to you as well

I've decided I have got to drag myself out of this mood and so far this morning not too bad! After I got the BFP's DH bought me some flowers, they are still alive, and everytime I look at them I keep thinking when they die the baby will be gone to irrational? moi? I can't bring myself to throw them out, so I have moved them into the hallway so they aren't in my face as much, and have decided that when they do die, (cannot believe I am going to admit to this ) but I am going to try and lay all thoughts of things going wrong again to rest with them.... I think I am going insane with how much the flowers are effecting me, and I hope once I can see that the baby will last without the flowers, I hope my train of thought will change.

OMG how mad do I sound?!! It is a good job for MN because I could never say this stuff out loud!

So, whilst I am getting on with my mood lifting day, I will keep the thoughts of healthy and well, and pass them along this thread

oh nataliejane, I really feel for you , and the flower thing, although irrational is a genuine concern. If I were you though, I'd tell DH how you feel; firstly so he doesn't just throw them out himself and upsets you without knowing why, and secondly to guarantee a supply of fresh flowers on a fortnightly basis until the baby arrives .

He'll understand how you feel I'm sure.

morning!

at Daisy's dd helping with the typing!

Bless you Natalie... don't know what to say - it's hard when those kind of feelings overtake you. Wishing you lots of 'healthy and well's!

Feeling loads calmer today. Have decided that what will happen will happen and there's no point exhausting/torturing myself over it. Can't say how long the calmness will last, but I might as well enjoy it while I can!

morning hope you are all well. Congratulations Nataliejane on your pregnancy. Totally understand the flower thinking and so glad it is not just me who has feelings like that!

I thought things were on the up a little yesterday when the spotting temporarily stopped but it appears to be back today and I even passed a very small clot (sorry if tmi). Now feeling very stressed and have spent the morning in tears. Had to tell ds that mummy had bumped her toe and that was why she was crying. Poor dh is very quiet and upset. Just can't believe this might be happening again so soon after the last time.

I felt lots of mevements last night I was sitting with the laptop on my lap on the soaf, and babyal was squirming away for ages (probably trying to escape the heat of the computer). I daren't move for fear of making it stop...well that was my excuse for MNetting all evening anyway.

It felt lovely . I'd had to odd flutter for a few weeks, but this was the first sustained attack, so to speak!

must preview before posting.....that should have said movements, sofa and babycal

Welcome to the newly pg ladies

Poppy I'm so sorry you're having such a tough time right now. I've read plenty of things on mn where people have bled, and even passed some clots, and things have still turned out ok, so I really hope this is the case for you. Did they say they'd scan you again in 1 or 2 weeks? If not, then see your gp / or epu if you can go directly, to say there's been a clot, and hopefully they'll check you again. Have you had any pain?

Those early weeks are soooo hard, and it's hard to stop worrying. I'm 20+3 now, and have my scan next Tuesday... I've told a few people now, even though I keep thinking what if I find out something awful is wrong next week. But then I don't want to deny its existence, just in case

X post with you Daisy - how exciting, it's nice to have something reassuring happening, as well, isn't it?

Oh Poppy, how horrible... my thoughts are with you. It's so hard, and so frustrating waiting to see what happens.

Daisy, what a lovely experience, and how exciting! How far along are you?

poppy, I didn't see your post

try not to worry, and call the EPU to see if they will scan you. sending you healthy and well vibes.

trying, I'm 15 weeks tomorrow. The last five weeks have flown by!

thanks everyone for being so kind. Didn't know whether to contact gp or not as at the moment I don't have any pains and just hoping against hope it stops and all will be well. Just got scanned on monday and epu said that was the last scan they had for this week. I had a blood test taken about 6 weeks ago (anti coagulant clotting) by my rheumatologist (I have psoriatic arthritis) as she wanted to check that for probs in preg although I was ok the 1st time but it was 6 years ago now! When I phoned the surgery they had a letter saying I had had the test done but no results for it and I have asked them more than once so I suppose its time to ring the hosp and ask.

Daisy it is soo exciting feeling all those movements - just wait till they are keeping you awake at night!!

Hello all!

I was told to come over here after starting a thread about worrying myself stupid. I am currently 10 weeks pregnant, following a mc, at 8 weeks, at the end of February. I had a scan 10 days ago and saw the heartbeat and felt reassured for a few days, but I am back worrying again about every twinge and 'wet' feeling (sorry if tmi!). I already have 2 dd's from very straightforward pregnancies but I don't seem to be able to stop myself fretting. I have a nuchal scan booked for next Friday and my first midwife appointment next thursday. I am hoping that feeling constantly sick is a good thing and that it is also good to have no energy.

xxx

Hi toratora
Congratulations on being pregnant again. Hope it all goes well next week at your scan. I think feeling sick is a very good sign as I had that for 5 months in my first preg but not so much this time (although only 6 weeks).

hi again toratora

all good symptoms you're sporting there! the chronic fatigue I found got worse with each subsequent pregnancy, and was worst between 8 and 11 weeks so you should start to feel better soon.

It is difficult to relax after having had a m/c. I look back on my first pregnancy with DS in amazement now as the thought of losing him never even crossed my radar.

If you have a look down the thread; justjules posted some stats on m/c on saturday afternoon i think it was.

good Luck for your nuchal scan next week, and feel free to worry/moan/vent/cry all you like on here. We've all been there, and those first weeks are sooooo hard.

Hi everyone, gosh lots of fantastic new BFPs on this thread - is great to see the newbies coming in as the oldies are graduating!
NatalieJane My MIL said she was worried that a necklace she had given me had brought bad luck and even though I think this is bollocks and that I love the necklace I cannot bring myself to wear it again while PG - daft I know!
I'm just waiting for my 21 week scan next week - very excited to have another look! have been organising PG yoga and a doula so starting to feel real at long last - Splishy I think we must have our scans around the same time?