Anyone due in April 2024 #3

[XenaTheWarriorPrincess]

New thread for April due dates!

Feel free to tag people from the old thread so they can find us easier.

@Cora24601 mine are also more period crampy low down, I don't know if it's just the weight of baby putting pressure. But I have had some strong BH along with it occasionally! 3rd here and still unsure 🤣 never had this in previous pregnancy's. Saying that this pregnancy has been completely different from the get go! Been 7 years since I had my son so can barely remember much! Don't know if it's my body telling me to slow down but all I did yesterday was a bit of housework 🙄 Still have 4 weeks before mat leave so hopefully it eases soon!

Has anyone had a visit from the heath visitor yet? I hadn’t realised the come round before the baby is born. What are they looking out for? I feel nervous about it as the house is a state and the nursery not set up yet etc!

@Bluesky85 i had my last baby during covid and this 100% did not happen but maybe because of covid? I had no idea they come before baby. However when the HV did visit last time she asked questions about where baby would be sleeping but she just sat in my lounge with me. I really wouldn't worry about mess and nursery unless you're living like a hoarder and need to crawl through rubbish I am sure they will have seem worse!! My baby's nursery wasn't ready until she was 8 months old if that helps

@Bluesky85 I used to work for a HV team and if I remember they offered antenatal visits between 32-36 weeks. I am 31 weeks and haven't had an appointment through yet. I think with cuts they may only be seeing first time mum's at home but it might depend on the area. They will ask lots of questions and discuss feeding, safe sleep etc with you. Its a long appointment compared with midwife appointments. When I worked in the team we didn't ask to see the nursery but I have heard that these days they ask at the birth visit (when baby is 10-14 days old) if they can see where baby sleeps. My house is currently a tip and we haven't got anything for the nursery yet so please don't fret!

@Bluesky85 I have health visitor due start of March, not my first child but has been a seven year gap. We don't have a nursery ready at all but baby will be in with us for ages. We do have his next to me set up in our room and his cot is set up in a corner in our lounge 🤣 I wouldn't worry about having stuff everywhere (babies require a lot of stuff 🤣) as long as your home is clean there will be nothing to worry about. I imagine they will discuss any concerns or questions you may have, they are here to help ☺️

@Bluesky85 I’ve been worried about this too as we’re in the middle of some renovations, I’m irrationally worried they will take the baby from me 😂

I think it's area dependant, I had my son in 2018 and never had any health visitor before I gave birth. 32+3 and no sign of one this time either

I have just checked with my friend who is a HV. Apparently where I live the HVs are only offering antenatal visits (even for first time parents) in the most deprived areas in the region I live. I'm sure it's different across the country. So it looks like I'll just be getting into a red book in the post x

Hi just wondering if anyone is getting additional information at their midwife appointments? When I Google the antenatal appointments for the nhs it gives a breakdown at what happens at each appointment, so at like 28 weeks it says additional info the be given on preparing for labour and birth, info to be given on recognising active labour, what happens after birth etc. but I’ve never had any of that at any of my appointments (now 32 weeks). My friends who have had babies in the past 6 months also got information given to them by now on like active birth & breastfeeding workshops and I haven’t been told anything like that. At all of my appointments since my booking appointment it’s been very swift- urine sample, blood pressure, baby heartbeat, and recently bump measurement and then I feel like I’m shuffled out. It’s always very quick and efficient which is great but now 32 weeks with my first and feel like I know nothing! Just wondering if anyone else is having a similar experience?

Me too @BVIre but I didn’t even realise until you’ve said that and I’ve just gone and had a look at the NHS website of what should be happening🤣🤣

Mine have been pretty quick just doing the expected checks and to be fair they do always ask me if I have any questions at the end/encourage me to ask away, so maybe I should be being a bit more proactive and bringing some of these things up with them? I’ve never really had many questions but wasn’t aware of that info on the NHS website of things that should have been discussed so I’ll definitely make a list before my next appointment and ask!

@BVIre me too, don't get half of what is described on NHS website or even a leaflet they gave me when I first booked. We haven't managed to get booked onto any antenatal classes locally so I'm bloody hoping the appointment the mw is meant to go through labour stuff is by the book or it will be like a carry on film when it comes to it as I have no idea!

Similar experience for me but my midwife signed me up for antenatal classes. It's my second child so don't necessarily need them but I'd definitely say they're useful. If your area doesn't offer anything like that (mine didn't during COVID), Baby Academy do some free ones on the basics which I found useful too!

I think it is area/funding dependent. I live in an area of high deprivation (their words not mine!) so we get extra visits including one before baby is born and a couple extra after baby. With my first, HV did check where baby was sleeping, if we had smoke alarms etc. I wouldn't worry about tidiness as they'll have seen all sorts but I would also be prepared they may want to see nursery/cot :)

Thanks so much everyone, I know it’s not great but glad it’s not just me! I didn’t realise until I was speaking to friends who have had babies in the last 6-12 months and they were on about all these nhs workshops they did and the info they were given at appointments- some complaining about midwives being a bit judgey on their choice to bottle feed but my midwife hasn’t even asked what my thoughts are regarding feeding! I’ll maybe take your stance too @Mrsttcno1 and be a bit more proactive! At my 31 week appointment I asked about the hypnobirthing classes that were running at the hospital and she seemed really confused no one had spoken to me about them as they are only offered between 20-31 weeks so I had just missed them?

the only thing I could think off is my friends were all consultant led so at the point I’m low risk and midwife led, do I just fall through the cracks a bit! It’s our first baby so my husband and I just feel a wee bit like the blind leading the blind lol

@Bluesky85 I've had the HV come by my house when I was 28 weeks. She didn't ask about the nursery. She asked if I planned to breastfeed and then gave me a leaflet where I can sign up for things regarding that and anything baby related. She was a lovely lady, the whole visit lasted 30 minutes max and she basically wanted to introduce herself and see if I had any questions. She told me that I should have already gotten The Red Book, but when I asked my midwife for it she said that now we'll only get them when the baby is born because a lot of women would forget to bring theirs with them when going in labour. I think it really depends on where you are, some of my friends got their red books before giving birth.

Anyone else's partners driving them mad with really awful name suggestions 🤣 we know we're having a little boy and he seems to think Horatio is a great middle name 🙄 apparently because you don't use middle names much they can be ridiculous! I'm losing my mind 🤣

ha. Talking about names, we did brainstorm but got nowhere.

About names too, I want to ask if any of your family members ask what names are you thinking for your baby? Do you share it? Or wait till you decided?

personally I don’t feel comfortable sharing before it’s born. Feel like a convo between me and DH. Just wondering if it’s just me or there are some like-minded ppl.

@MumDaisy1980 yes 100% keep names between the two of you. Once baby is here no one will say anything about the name whereas I think your more likely to get opinions before baby is born.

on the subject of names we are really struggling for a boys name! They are so hard!! I don’t personally like traditional boys names but we keep changing our minds over the names we do like. We’ve got a girls name we love so can’t see that changing!

@MumDaisy1980 we told everyone the name 😅 I got mixed reviews on middle names but don't really care to be honest 😂 but yeah if you keep it to yourself you'll avoid this problem.

General question for people who are using the badger notes app - where it says antenatal conversations, would the midwife reply? Or are they just general notes to look at at appointments?

Also another question for people on iron tablets: any less common side effects? I felt really tired / drowsy / and a bit dizzy today and thought maybe it's the iron. Not sure if I should speak to midwife again or just carry on with it..

@sweetdreams23 thanks! That’s exactly how I felt the other day. When in laws asking what name we thinking . And DH started sharing the convo we had. I felt uncomfortable but couldnt explain why at the time. And I did say when his siblings expecting newborn, they never share what their plan or name thinking.

ha well indeed they had already given some of their opinions. And I communicated with DH already, which he acknowledged my feeling.

thanks again!

@Petris123 thanks too!

@MumDaisy1980 I told everyone the name I had chosen the minute I found out I was having a girl.
Everyone knows what my baby is called and I have gotten not ONE bad comment.
The only struggle I will have is gonna be the short version of her name!😂
The name I have chosen has a very common short version, which I hate, and I want the short version to be a less used/more foreign version. Or just use the full name!

Think full name Margaret, which could be either Peggy or Maggie. I HATE Peggy, and want it to be Maggie. Or Margaret, but definitely NOT PEGGY (not the actual names in question, but you get the idea!)
So Im sure there will be some correcting of people, but otherwise, its gone really well for me!

We don't know the gender and had a long list of names which we showed to my partner's 90 year old grandma when she was in hospital to cheer her up but wouldn't share even that with anyone else. My friend who is due after me and having a girl has told me the name they have chosen. I wouldn't do that if it was the other way round as I'd be scared they had chosen the same name! We have now chosen the name for if we have a boy. We have a first name for a girl but not the middle name, though like @ASGIRC I have just realised what people might shorten it to, and I would NOT like this as though the name in itself is nice its the name of a girl my own ex cheated on me with and even though I don't give them a second thought now and am much happier with my partner, I wouldn't want people using that shortened name!

As for iron tablets I think they should tend to help with tiredness, rather than cause it. I started them a few weeks ago. Have you been prescribed 1-2 tablets per day, and are you taking 2? I take 1 on a morning on an empty stomach and one late afternoon. Though I have been tired my entire pregnancy, I'm no longer falling asleep straight after work at 4pm. Could it just be that you're later in pregnancy and everything is harder work?

@ASGIRC thanks!

@ZB86 thanks! The grandma situation is understandable.