Due December 2023 part 4

[wannabemum38]

Part 4 thread ladies

I don't know what the gender is yet but if it's a girl then I can reuse everything as I have a 3 year old daughter. However if its a boy then we will need to do a new shop which will also be fun. One of the reasons I want to find out is i like to plan but I have my 20 week scan on the 31st July so maybe I will..undecided.

I also agree a newborn baby blanket is always a special keepsake for baby. Definitely would recommend investing in a lovely one. Everything else Asda although M&S have lovely bits too.

@Nclktnntt

John Lewis, fruit, picadilly, green radical ones, kite clothing and boots all have lovely neutral bits.

In terms of clothes, we took newborn and up to 1 month to the hospital. Newborn was big on both my Diddy dds at first. Most babies won't fit 0-3 months straight away.

With winter babies you'll need long sleeve vests, baby grows with feet, a cardigan and a hat (in my experience hospitals give you a knitted hat at birth with winter babies), then a blanket to put over baby in the carseat on the way home. Sleepsuits with built in scratch mits (so sleeves that fold over their hands) are also a god send for keeping winter babies warm

Frugi*

Oh I'll look at those thank you, I've screen shot your winter baby suggestions - I was looking at the sleep suits in next yesterday. They seemed massive.

We tried all the usual spots in brum and struggled to find anything so will be popping to merryhill in the hopes they have more selections for us there. Fingers crossed 🤞

Glad I'm not the only one who's found it hard to get gender neutral things. I thought I was just being fussy! I managed to get some nice things in the Next sale, and a few bits on Vinted (BNWT). I've only bought clothes so far - not going to buy other things until the 20 week scan. I've bought a mixture of newborn and 0-1 months clothes based on what size other babies were in our family!

I don't know why I'm so scared to buy anything yet, it's like each day I'm thinking is everything okay? Now I feel I need to wait until the 20 week scan before I buy anything. Just all the mind I guess.

On another stressful note, I'm trying to figure out when the best time to start on maternity leave. When is everyone going to start there's? As baby is due is Dec, is it possible to still take annual leave the whole of December and start maternity leave in January? Also, is it right that you get back bank Holidays during your maternity leave?
Trying to find the best way of getting paid as long as possible.

@RG84 mat leave usually has to start the day of the birth or the day after but you should be able to carry over unused annual leave and yes you accrue all bank holidays. I’m planning to finish at 36 weeks (mid nov) do 2-3 weeks annual leave, 52 weeks mat leave, then use accrued annual leave to go through to early January 2025 to go back to work

I think I'm going to go off at 37 weeks as I'll be "returning" 1st July to get paid over the summer (teacher). So I have plenty of weeks still available to take. Would love to take the whole of December to be honest but probably should try and earn as much as I can. Teacher's maternity pay is woeful!

I’m finishing work the 15 December using holiday and then we get Xmas off anyway, so starting Mat leave on my due date 30 December.

Planning to ‘return’ to work end of Nov / early December 2024 but use KIT days and holidays to not really go back (might do a couple of days a week) but I’ll be getting paid for those months!

My work mat leave is really generous (26 weeks full pay) so I’m very fortunate to be able
to take the full year despite being the higher earner.

@Nclktnntt My son went straight into 0-3 month clothes. He was too big for newborn and 0-1 months! And only on the 75 percentile so while he was big, he wasn’t ridiculously so. If all your family have babies over 8 pounds then I really wouldn’t bother with newborn. Maybe a few vests/ babygrows in 0-1 but I’d mostly buy 0-3.

@Mushroo you are so lucky! Mine is:
(a) 4 weeks’ full pay
(b) 2 weeks’ 90% of a week’s pay
(c) 12 weeks’ half pay + SMP
(d) 21 weeks’ SMP only
I would definitely take all that time too if I were you!

@Charlielechat I was really shocked at how low public sector is (assuming your public sector). My DH is the same and we looked at his just out of interest and I was surprised.

Hopefully you can make it work by timing return before school holidays! :)

@Mushroo yeah first day of holidays here will be 1st July, so I'm not really back until end of August which isn't the worst! Will be about 8 months or so maternity. I always said I would definitely take the whole year off when I had a baby - but then reality hit 😂

Fellow brummie here

yeh, same with me, always thought I’d tag on holidays to take off like 13 months! Really need this cost of living crisis to slow down a bit 😂

I think when I take my maternity leave will depend on whether I’m allowed to work from home. If I’m allowed to exclusively work from home for last month or so I’ll try go pretty close to due date. Maybe a week before. Otherwise will likely take it earlier.

Really helpful to see everyone’s thoughts on maternity, as first timer I really have no idea. Likely to go off as close to due date as I can (maybe week before so from 15 Dec) through to end of November 2024 or maybe extend to the whole year with holiday. My mat leave is 2 months full pay and 10 months half pay which I find quite random but does make me consider taking more time where I hadn’t before.

also on the baby clothes note, I have mainly bought 0-3 months, some 3-6 when I got carried away and a few newborn bits but will buy more once we know more about baby’s size. I imagine we’ll be using mostly 0-3 months from other people’s experiences though!

Anyone started thinking about travel systems yet? Such a minefield!

As I started my new job recently only be getting SMP which as we know isn't much so sadly I will.be only taking 6 months off and then all.being well going back part time 6 months only.plus side is I work from home. Will be taking 2 to 3 weeks off hopefully before due date as my midwife told me due to my age they probably won't let me go over 40 weeks by much so want a couple of weeks to just rest and nest lol

I'm NHS so the latest they allow maternity to start is the Sunday before your due date. I'm due 13th so will start it on 10th but take 2-3 weeks annual leave before that. Will then use accrued leave at the other end to return January 2025 (hopefully for 4 days instead of 5)
Ours is 8 weeks full pay
18 weeks half pay plus SMP
13 weeks SMP only
13 weeks unpaid
But...they allow you to spread it equally over the year so it's the same amount monthly over the year which is good!

Thanks for your comments regarding maternity leave. As my daughter was born outside the UK, (wasn't part of the plan) due to the pandemic, I really had no clue of what was going on with my maternity, leave, pay...the stress just took over and postpartum depression etc..I also didn't realise I get my bank Holidays back so I got short changed on my return as my employer didn't raise that to me either...convenient.

As I work from home, I was also thinking of taking as long as possible. Due date 18th December but I'm thinking will be first week of December due to csection. No date is booked for that yet as my consultant appointment and scan isn't until 1st November. My plan was to take annual leave in December as from 22dec to 2nd Jan the office is closed (not part of annual leave) and then to start my mat leave in Jan. I currently have 20 days annual leave and in Dec will accure 30 days. We accure monthly (new rule since last year a bit annoying). I really want to take a year off but the SMP is just so rubbish.. I get 6 weeks full pay and then after than it's the usual SMP. I've been with the company for 7 years and there is no real benefits that I actually get. The pay isn't too bad but if I made an effort left, I could get more and then the other benefit is working from home. That's literally it.

I have a one to one with my manager later today regarding work stuff and I was going to tell her today regarding the pregnancy. As I work from home, I see my colleagues on zoom and we have arranged an office day on the 2nd Aug and will be very obvious I'm pregnant but I feel I need to tell her first.

Sorry I have 101 things going around in my head. Furthermore, we are moving house in 3 weeks 😵‍💫

@NoodleQueen90 that's a good deal you got there with the NHS, thats brilliant. I wish it was something like that for everyone on maternity leave regardless of the company.

@RG84 Sorry things are stressful for you! Just tackle one thing at a time. It is still early to be thinking about maternity in too much depth, I think we have until 25 weeks right? I would tackle the move first and get yourself comfortable with the moving to do list then move onto the next thing. Totally get the overwhelming feeling.

We are moving in around 3 weeks too into my mums house while are next house purchase goes through and then moving finally hopefully by October to our new house 😳 so trust me, I get it! I’m conciliatory trying to block it out until I need to think about it, one step at a time!

I’m due 13th and am planning taking annual leave from 4th December then going back Jan ‘25 after using accrued holiday too
my Mat leave pay isn’t great - I’m only planning on having one so I really want to make the most of it but know it might become a struggle

I’m 19 weeks today and am definitely looking more pregnant! I’m on holiday in Greece and it’s around 30c so I’m trying to stay cool!
Still not felt definite movements (maybe some bubbles) - I’m starting to worry but hopefully they’ll start soon 🤞🏼

@smldnlove you're right and another reason for my headaches, I have way too much going on in my head.
Right, house move first...my daughter is also starting nursery in September so another thing to add to the list. But you're right, I have plenty of time to think about maternity leave etc. Good luck also with the house move too. Opposite for me, right now we are with my parents so it will be a gradual move.
Thank you x

20 week scan went well yesterday, she even gave us a thumbs up 😁 but need to go back in 7-10 days as she was in an awkward position so the sonographer couldn't get a good view of her heart. Otherwise, all looked good 😊