Being the first person to grab hold of baby as I give birth?

[cutiebreebree]

I’m going to be a FTM and being 3 weeks away from due date I’ve been having a lot of thoughts around the details that go into play during labour. I’m hoping for a vaginal birth and I’ve been wondering, is it possible for me to be the first person to grab hold of my baby as it makes its way out of my body? Sorry if it’s TMI but I’m not too comfortable with the thought of a healthcare professional holding my baby as I birth him. Of course, the practicalities of the reality of the moment might be completely different and I might just be in a better position having a healthcare professional help me but I’m just curious to know if it’s possible more than anything 😊

I had no choice but to have a very medical c-section, done by the head of maternal-fetal medicine with multiple assisting surgeons and planned with great rigor. It was the exact opposite of the calm, quiet water-birth that I would have preferred, but it was what was necessary given my situation.

thankfully my surgeon and the nurses in the OR still went out of their way to give me a good birth experience. They let me make requests for things that were not standard procedure if they were not part of the surgery itself. It helped immensely with making that experience less stressful and more joyful. They were little changes that made no difference to them, except that they just weren’t how they normally did things, like the exact moment when my husband would move from OR to recovery

there are ways to have a patient centered experience while still making sure that the medical needs are prioritized. Being able to do that is really what makes a great health care provider.

*You made sure your sister was a good girl who did as she was told 🤢

You had an amazing birth but can't remember it

The cognitive dissonance in your post is astounding*

How dare you be so dismissive of the birth experience of others!

You were lucky and had your preferred birth experience without intervention. Others have done it differently. It's not wrong to need or indeed want 'help' to give birth, just because you didn't. Stop making others feel shitty about it.

Mumsnet "taught" me before I had my first that I could ask for - and be given - whatever pain relief I wanted, demand an epidural whenever I wanted it and turn down examinations as they are too invasive.

I'd be dead following that advice, so would my kid.

I'll repeat: write a birth plan, then throw it away.

Your midwife will listen and take on board whatever they can depending on the situation they are presented with on the day. A birth plan should be about preferences, not demands.

Good luck OP.

Typical MN HCP-bashing thread.

As I’ve said (as have others), do your research OP and have a basic idea of what you’d like, but don’t set it in stone.

I’ve delivered a lot of babies in a variety of ways, and most of the women had “no pain relief” in their birth plans, but virtually all of them wanted pain relief when the time came. Then some of them blamed themselves afterwards, and felt that they’d failed.

It’s like breastfeeding - by all means, plan to do it, but don’t beat yourself up if you can’t.

As much as many would like to turn this into a “women vs medics” issue, the sad fact is that sheer force of will does not guarantee a living baby. Sometimes intervention is needed, even if it was the opposite of what was in the birth plan.