June 2023 Babies ☀️ (Thread 3)

[firsttimelondonmummy]

@BellaTheDarkOverlord @MrsP4 @BobbySD345 @DrinkingAllTheGin @CaliGirl47 @Tor88 @B1993 @HalWin2221 @Texasholdem20 @LT103 @NalaNana @thedust @Babybaby66 @ireneadler101 @theodora2146 @Okapi99 @justbelieve @Pumpkincat11 @AstroH @peonyjam @Ally1992

So I went for my gender scan last night at 17 weeks (was supposed to go last week but it got cancelled) was all excited to find out boy or girl, and the little pixie wouldn't uncross their legs, so I have to do jumping Jack's jog on the spot, anything to get him/her moving and nope nothing worked, so I have to go back next week to see if they can see 😂, I know I'm lucky to get to see them again and for free but the extra week is going to dragggg

@Zaalfruit Please don't feel guilty or feel alone! I too had the same thoughts! I'm having another DD my eldest is 3 next week. I so wanted and longed for a little boy not just for me but for my DH too as I know he was really hoping for a boy! I cried continuously for a couple days just grieving for something that you've wanted and dreamed of. And the same I'm not going to love this little one any less because she's a girl but it's getting over the the fact that your not going to get the little boy you always imagined having. My DH dad so my father in law had never been loving towards my DH and he's siblings although the does love them and would do anything for them just not how we are with our DD and my husband said he wanted a little boy to have the kind of relationship with that he never had with his dad.
It affected me more than DH I still think about it and would still love a little boy but we are so done after Number 2. I've just made peace with the fact I'm meant to be a girl mum. I never had a sister growing up but always wanted one so I'm happy I've got that for my DD. Here if you want to chat xx

@B1993 Thanks. The spotting stopped again but rib pain now worse so struggling to sit at work or drive. Laying down is fine. It didn't start until 22 weeks last time so this is early at 18+5. I'll keep an eye on it. Last time it didn't fully blow up until I was 36 weeks.

@HasHus86 I felt very little symptoms between 16-18 weeks. Then started with popping in uterus when she's moving. I think we're all different. I hope you start feeling something soon x

@Zaalfruit I felt sad too when I found out it wasn't a boy as this is our last and DH was hoping a boy this time. It's ok to feel sad as you're mourning the loss of what could have been. I told DH it's ok to feel sad. He's excited now for our second girl. People also keep asking me about a third but I probably won't be able to have another nor do I want to. Too many complications. Also no guarantee it would be a boy.

@Zaalfruit, I don't have my 20w scan until Monday but due to sneak peek etc. am pretty certain this baby is a boy, too. I would have loved a girl as this is also our last, but I don't think it's meant to be. It's a really relatable feeling and one shared by quite a few of us on here from what I've read. Don't feel guilty for mourning the loss of a dream but know that, ultimately, you won't want to change it in the end.

How disappointing that baby wasn't playing ball, @Hlc86! It can feel like such a long wait but as you've said, at leastvits another opportunity to see baby! Do you have a boy/girl preference?

@HasHus86, if you're concerned could you book in for a private scan? Or contact your community midwives and see what they say. They may offer to monitor baby's heartbeat just for a bit of reassurance.

It sounds very painful @BellaTheDarkOverlord! Hopefully it eases off soon. 🤞🏻 Could your GP perscribe something if it persists?

Thank you everyone - I was feeling really bad for feeling this way . I’m so glad everyone here is so understanding I was really worried about backlash and judgement.

Thank you ladies, I managed to get in touch with the community midwife eventually. She was so nice and checked baby's heartbeat and said it's healthy and doing well. I feel a lot more reassured, have got my 20 week scan on Tuesday, cannot wait. Will be finding out the gender, I have no clue and cant picture a boy or girl yet. I know when they tell me I will be bawling my eyes out.

After what has happened with my dad and me and my siblings (there's 4 of us) were there for each and have been helping each other, I'm so glad my 2 kids will have another sibling. I'm 37 now and wasn't 100% sure if we should have another, so glad we got this blessing. Wish it was easier , I'd go for number 4 after this too ! Family is everything

Thank you guys for the advice/reassurance. I am forever grateful for this thread! I’m just going to wait until my 16 week midwife appointment which is on Thursday and ask the midwife if she could check the baby’s heartbeat.
Can't believe I’m so behind everyone else! My 20 week scan isn’t until 16th of February!

@Zaalfruit don't worry, I felt the same about having a second boy and knowing I'll never have a girl. A few weeks on and I've got my head round it pretty much. People give people a hard time about gender disappointment but it's a real and valid thing. It has no bearing on how much you'll love baby when she's here.

Had my 20 week scan today at 20+1. Baby is doing well and measurements are good too. I asked them to check he was definitely a boy seen as though the date is Friday 13th 😂 Everything went perfectly 💙

They told me I have an anterior placenta and I haven’t felt noticeable movements yet - but it is my first too so not too sure if I have felt anything or not.

To those that have had their 20 week scan, did they tell you the sex without being asked or did you have to push?
I don't want to know unless baby makes it really obvious!

@DrinkingAllTheGin I had mine on Wednesday and at the beginning before he started the sonographer asked me "is there anything you don't want to know" and I said no. He confirmed with me again that I was happy to know the sex.

If I were you though I'd say at the beginning not to tell you!

@Veryxonfused i just said the same today. Baby is so active now but every time I put hand on tummy he stops moving !! Only once have a felt a kick with my hand

@DrinkingAllTheGin at the scan - they asked right from the beginning do you want to know the gender . Then they told me after doing all checks on baby they will tell me the gender.

@Dotty23 ooh I have an anterior placenta too - I have felt a random pull . I can’t work out if they are kicks . ( previous pregnancy wasn’t anterior and I felt the kicks early on ) Heres to hoping you and I feel strong kicks soon !

(Thanks all - it’s so weird I didn’t feel this with my first . Husband is super excited to be a girl dad and he is finding it hard that I am feeling this way . I know I will be fine in a few days . )

@Zaalfruit Yeah same - I keep putting it down to round ligament pain and it’s probably little movements🫣😂 Only a few more weeks to go for us hopefully to really feel something.

@DrinkingAllTheGin I already knew the gender so I didn’t say anything but she never told me until I asked her to confirm it for me. I would definitely tell them if you don’t want to know - just incase! x

I had my private scan and heard the heartbeat at 17 weeks but at my 12 and 20 week scan they never offered to let me hear it (I did forget to ask though!)

@DrinkingAllTheGin With DS he was waving his bits and I think the sonographer got a bit of a shock. She quickly moved the probe and said “do you want to know?” We did and she seemed relieved but tbh even pointing it out I couldn’t see a penis. That said, this time around at my 12w scan, it was weird that I could clearly see things I never noticed before (like the umbilical cord). And I thought I saw a willy at an unexpected 17w checkup scan. They won’t tell you unless you want to know and even with a boy waving his bits about it wasn’t obvious to me 😂

@Dotty23, congratulations on another successful scan! 🥰 Lovely photo of your little boy! 💙

@DrinkingAllTheGin, mine's Monday so haven't had it yet. With DS they asked after doing all of the checks if we wanted to know. As I'd already had a private gender scan, I said we knew but sonographer what happy to confirm the results for us.

If you don't want to know, it's best to mention it at the start.

@PurBal, it's interesting that you couldn't tell - at our gender scan with DS he wasn't shy about showing us he was a boy either and it was very obvious haha! 😳🤣

@B1993 tbf DH could tell

Hi @BellaTheDarkOverlord, sorry to hear about your pain. Didn't know there was a link between rib pain and pre-eclampsia. I'm getting pain, aches and soreness on my ribs and hip on my left side, but only when I lay on them (and just after). Don't know if this could be the same thing or whether it's just a musculoskeletal thing. Do you think it's something to talk to the midwife about?

@PurBal, I can't remember them showing us DS' bits at the 20w scan - I did wonder if it's easy to see that little bit earlier when everything's not so squashed up 🤷🏻‍♀️

@pippabg, I have no personal
experience with rib pain/preeclampsia but they ask about headaches and itchy skin at all the midwife appointments so think they could be the more common signs. Definitely reach out to your community midwives if you're worried though. I hope it's nothing serious and just baby getting under your ribs!

@B1993 sorry for my ignorance what are
headaches and itchiness a sign of? I’ve had both 😭

@firsttimelondonmummy, preeclampsia. I think swollen hands/feet is another common sign as I've been asked about that, too - give it a Google as I'm sure there will be more to look out for. I think they say you only need to be worried about headaches if they are persistent and don't shift with paracetamol (I had them frequently early on and midwife wasn't concerned at that point). Itchy skin can be normal, too, especially as the skin is more elastic during pregnancy and stretching can cause that.

I'd definitely keep monitoring your symptoms and get in touch with your community midwife if you're worried.

@B1993 thank you!
I just had a google and it says high blood pressure is the big flag and I’m 90/40 so right on the opposite side in low so hopefully just generic itching and headaches are very sporadic.

@firsttimelondonmummy I think itching can be a symptom of a pregnancy related liver condition, called ICP. I don't know much about it sorry but my friend had it when she was pregnant. There'll be plenty on Google though I'm sure which can explain it much better than me 😊 x

@LouLa7 it’s not severe itching and when I google it’s saying it’s normal so hopefully nothing to worry about 🤞🏻

@firsttimelondonmummy oh that's good! I think ICP is pretty uncommon too so it's more than likely not that :) x