Due March 2023 - thread 4

[TeddyBeans]

Thread 4 for the chatty bunch!

23/2 - botleybump 💓
24/2 -
25/2 -
26/2 - TeddyBeans 💓
27/2 -
28/2 - BabyNumber3OnTheWay
1/3 -
2/3 - BethBeef 💙
3/3 - LittleAcorn20 💛, LaForza101 💙, SammyJay5
4/3 - EastyBaby19 💙, Cdoc 💙
5/3 - Babynum2 💙
6/3 -
7/3 - GreenIsle 💓, Noodle20, Pickles23 💛
8/3 - Splashh, June628
9/3 - Penelope_2023
10/3 - iratepirate 💛
11/3 -
12/3 - Katlouise24 💓
13/3 - ToffeeEl, Franklin321 💓

14/3 - beatingheartbaby
15/3 - Hrf1503 💓
16/3 -
17/3 - Room4onemore 💛
18/3 - XjustagirlX 💛
19/3 - Dreamingof3 💓, alotoftutus, AK93 💙
20/3 -
21/3 - FirstTimeTryer93

22/3 -
23/3 -
24/3 - whydotheyallhaverubbishwheels
25/3 -
26/3 -
27/3 - Cats23, firstlittleone, dmb91 💛, AGirlsNameIsAryaStark 💛, hol92, Amy1303 💛, bobduncan 💛
28/3 -
29/3 - Perexi 💛
30/3 - ChristmasJumpers
31/3 -

Let me know if you need adding/updating and I'll pop you on my list for the next thread OP!

@TeddyBeans thank you 😊

Is anyone having a ELCS? I am thinking of asking for one, my other three births have all been natural. Or has anyone had a ELCS before? Wondering when I should approach the subject? I don’t see the midwife now until 25 weeks.

@PeonyPops im having an elective, I had an emergency section with my first birth so asked at my booking in and got a consultant appointment in dec for it. I think you can ask at your next midwife app and there’s still lots of time!

Had my 20 week scan, all went well, baby is growing nicely. The sonographer said my placenta is at the front so that could explain why I haven't felt movements from baby yet.

Next scan will be at 28 weeks for me 😍

Congrats on all the scans, so nice to hear everyone‘s positive news! 😊💙💕

Was wondering how long people are planning to take maternity leave for? I know it‘s completely individual choice, but just curious. I was keen to take a year but with the cost of living crisis I will probably have to go back to work after 6 months. No way DH and I can pay for bills/mortgage etc without both of our salaries. Childcare will be expensive too (no one to help) but still cheaper than me not earning my monthly salary.

Am I going to feel like I‘m missing out leaving my little daughter at 6 months for a full time job or do people generally enjoy going back to work at that stage? FTM so no idea what to expect!

@Perexi I would assume its an age thing! X

@PeonyPops I had an elective last time, but I'd had an emergency before that so it's just something they ask 😂
Aiming for a vbac this time although my consultant isn't very happy about it 🤷‍♀️

@Perexi being under consultant just means a little bit more monitoring, for me last time it meant very little other than a few more appts and further on in the pregnancy she deemed me as low risk again and signed me off from her care. Under a consultant sometimes they restrict where you can give birth e.g. not in an MLU or at home, but that's always just advisory and it's absolutely your choice.

@MattyM5 it's tough isn't it?! We don't have childcare from family or friends so rely solely on nursery and their eye-watering fees. Make sure you've had a look at financial help options available when it comes to nursery, if you're not already aware as that could change your decision. Most people are entitled to 20% of childcare fees back from the government through the tax-free childcare scheme.
With my first I had 10mths (9mths statutory and then 1mth holiday accrued through maternity leave). I felt she was too young then even, but perhaps any age feels too young til you send them. It takes a few weeks to adjust to leaving them, but nursery has always been the best ever thing for my little girl. She loves it and I think they are amazing places where they can really thrive. So much so that despite finances being tight with my mat pay, we will still send her when I'm off work, she would be sad to stop going.

@MattyM5 I'm having this dilemma at the moment. Our policy is 6 weeks full pay, 6 weeks 90% and then statutory. I'm the higher earner in our household and just cannot afford to drop to statutory, it would be impossible so I'm planning on returning full time after the initial 12 weeks is up but working from home (we do flexitime too which helps) for 3 months, then going back to the office 3 days a week whilst baby is in nursery/childcare.

My boss is the owner of the company and he keeps telling me how awful birth will be and that I'll need to be off longer with the baby. That's all well and good if you're going to pay me for longer, but if you're not you can't dictate how long I should be off for!

@PeonyPops I also have the choice this time due to an Emcs last time, not sure what to do so far they have me down As elective section but if I go into my labour myself (before section date) I want to be left alone 😂 which they have written down. I just told them I will 100% not be induced again as I had a bad experience with my son. Hubby wants me to have section but I think I wanna try myself if possible 🤷‍♀️

@MattyM5 I'm taking 9 months, going off at Xmas and going back in September. I work term time so it makes sense to go back with the new school year. The SMP isn't a huge drop from my usual wages (yay being a minimum wage part time worker) so it won't be a massive shock for me and DP to cope with. I'm also lucky to have my mum look after tiny when I go back to work so won't have huge childcare costs to contend with either.

@AGirlsNameIsAryaStark your boss is weird! I was up and back to uni a couple of days after DS was born. There's nothing saying you won't have a really straightforward birth and be right as rain a few days later. The sleepless nights might be harder to overcome while working but not impossible

@allthingssparkly so pleased you had a good scan! Looking forward to my rescan on Friday to see if tiny is up for playing ball this time

@TeddyBeans honestly I’m sick of him. He thinks because his wife has had 3 kids he’s the expert on child birth. It was alright for them as he’s minted enough she doesn’t have to work, although he seems to forget he still pays her a £30k salary from the company for absolutely nothing. They live in la la land.

Thanks @Dreamingof3 and @LittleAcorn20 the midwife confirmed it's standard as my age and my mum had preeclampsia so there's a few more appointments just to be safe.

With mat leave were still debating how long we can manage, I only get 8 weeks at full pay then it's SMP which is not ideal with the current climate! Hoping for at least 6 month longer if we can. We are trying to put away what we can now to help next year and with some savings.

We both work from home and are lucky that although we aren't super close distance wise to our family's they are super excited to be involved and help look after the little one when they can 🤞🏻

@TeddyBeans I'm the same, work part time on not much more than minimum wage so statutory mat pay isn't much different to what I'd earn anyway!

Hi mums Ive had a very bad scan day today just got home after being there 5 hours tears panic the lot. My actual scan was ok but when i had my internal to have my cervix measured she said i need to send you around to the doctor right now. I waited 2 hours and went in and told them i need to go i have to get my kids can i make a new app after im back from holiday the midwife said when are you going i said tomorrow morning she asked me to wait a minute. She took me into a private room and said the doctor will be in in a minute you need to wait for her and you wont be able to go on holiday. Tears started panic set in....the doctor has said my cervix is dangerously short (i already knew it was short from previous pregnancy) but its got shorter at 16mm. She told me i cant stop you going away but we need to admit you now to start you on a hormone to stop you going into labour and causing a misscarriage and then give you a stitch. After lots and lots of thought i am not going to cyprus tomorrow with my family now and instead will go into hosp tomorrow morning and just hope for the best its not 100% effective especially because my cervix is already open and its just a waiting game now.

Oh no @Babynum2 that sounds horribly stressful. I’m so sorry you’ve had to make that decision. 😕 Fingers crossed that the procedure helps you.

I’m planning on taking 12 months + 1 month of annual leave at the end of maternity leave.

my scan is this week, super excited to see baby and to learn who they are 🥰

I’m so sorry to hear this, but you have made a decision and you are doing all you can for your baby! Try and keep as positive as you can. I know a few people who have made it most of their labour before the baby has arrived and the the baby has been fine

I'm taking just two weeks mat leave. I took 7 months with my first. I'm self employed and this is my second baby so I know what I'm in for as last time I was in hospital over a week. Its going to be a hard few months but I will manage. I'm a copywriter so will work to my deadlines in the evenings when husband is home from his work and at weekends.xxx

You manage with whatever you can do. I had a traumatic birth with first and was in hospital over a week but this time Im taking just two weeks mat leave as I have no other choice. I will do my deadlines in the evenings and weekends when husband is home as we have no help

@hellosunshineagainxxx exactly you have to do what works best for you, not anyone else. Our company have really flexible working (work from wherever you want, whatever time of day as long as you do your weekly hours basically) but just because I’m having a baby it’s now apparently different for me because he knows better than everyone else.

@Babynum2 so sorry to hear but you’re doing what’s best for you and your baby. Keeping everything crossed for you

Oh yikes @Babynum2 hope you are doing as ok as you can be after a day like that! Good luck for tomorrow crossing everything for you xx

@Babynum2 so sorry to hear that, just know you did the right thing for you and your little one, and it's a good thing you caught that early!

Guys, can I get a bit of advice from those who have dealt with gestational diabetes before?

We had our 20 week scan, everything was good 🙏🏽 but the baby was weighing a bit heavier than normal and I read this could be an indicator for gestational diabetes. How did you guys deal with it, was anyone able to control it with their diet & exercise?

I've not been eating terribly, but I defo haven't been exercising & read online that we should be getting 10k steps a day 🤣 with working from home there have been dyas I barely got 200 steps... 😳

@Babynum2 oh wow I'm so sorry you have to miss your holiday! Will insurance cover your costs? More importantly, I hope the medication works and they can prevent anything bad happening to baby. Will you have a stitch as well? Fingers crossed for you my lovely 🤞🤞

@Splashh what was baby's weight? Just curious because I've been told I'm borderline for getting GD (had one GTT already and another one being booked for 28 weeks) and am surprised I wasn't told anything untoward about baby's weight