Due March 2023 - thread 3

[TeddyBeans]

New thread for ladies due Feb/March 2023.

PM me if you want a link to our private and hidden FB group!

@TeddyBeans thank you how exciting! If it wasn't for DH being so against the idea, I'd be finding out in a fortnight I think 🤣 so this can be my gender reveal moment haha! It's as close as I'll come to one til march! Baby is going to be kicking me so hard in the next few weeks with those legs, I'm very scared!!

@alotoftutus someone else said "knowledge is power" and they're right. When my DD was 11months a GP randomly spotted that she was out of proportion and delayed motor skills. Queue all manner of tests for various significantly life-altering disabilities. It's been quite the rollercoaster. At present we are still none the wiser and she's now outperforming what they expected of her developmentally.
In our eyes and minds our babies (here or growing still) are perfection and to be told there could be an issue is really hard hitting. Especially that moment you first consider it. It's hard because you've never considered it before (queue floods of emotion) AND you don't have any knowledge yet so your mind is running wild with "what ifs" Whatever they have to say, the more you KNOW, the better you'll feel. Google really can't help you tonight, even though I don't ever take my own "stay off Google" advice.
I know my situation isn't equivalent, but the worry I have felt over something being 'wrong' with a baby of mine I imagine to be quite similar whether they're here on earth or still in a tummy!
Now she is 2 and a half nearly and I've really come to accept the cards we have been dealt, and realised I have THE best support network already in my family and friends who've been so kind through the multiple hospital stays/ anxious waiting for results, love my little girl to bits and would help us through anything life throws at us.
Stay strong, it may be nothing. And if it's something having knowledge and expertise of the medical staff to move forward is going to be best!

@LittleAcorn20 you are SO right!! The lack of support and pressure on women at a time when we are at our most vulnerable anyway is shocking. I'm very pro breastfeeding IF it's not negatively effecting the mothers mental health. Breastfeeding is a lot. I've managed to feed all 4 of my children to aged 2 at least, but there were times with my first who was premature that I didn't think I could do it. I was lucky that I had support whilst he was in special care but once we left and was home there was nothing. My third had a possible tongue tie and feeding was agony, again help was non existent. Breastfeeding once established can feel like the most natural thing in the world - but it doesn't just come naturally to everyone overnight. It's definitely something that needs work and support, and like everything important support just isn't there due to budgets :(

I'm not even sure the gender of our bubs. I guessed wrong with our 1st I said boy, of course was our DD! My mother in law wants a boy, same as my partner. I'm not fussed at all but my mother wants a girl (of course😂). I would happily wait until birth, but fiancé is completely against it so I've agreed to find out early. Just under 3 weeks to go!

@alotoftutus hats off breastfeeding 4 and a preemie too 🌟
I had DD during the first lockdown and there was very little support. I paid for private Zoom support and was lucky I was in a financial position to do so.
Friends we managed to make in antenatal classes before the pandemic hit struggled and were met with virtually no support. Nothing was face to face, we didn't see midwifes after day 3 and never saw a health visitor til DD was 18mths. Out of 6 of us in my NCT I was the only one who EBF for longer than a fortnight, and only really I think because of luck. I had a straightforward labour/recovery and a baby who took to breast straight away. All 6 of us had hoped to breastfeed and I know it caused some of the girls a huge amount of disappointment.
The message 'breast is best' just isn't fair when not backed up with adequate support in those early days.
Anyway, we are creating a very specific rant here that we should probably raise with the NHS rather than Mumsnet 🤣

@TTC24 I got DS wrong too 😂 was convinced he was a girl. Not long til you find out! Ours is on the 17th ❤️❤️

@LittleAcorn20 Thank you so much for sharing your experience- it has really helped ❤️ I'm going to ty and sleep tonight and deal with whatever tomorrow throws at me tomorrow I guess.

I hope you get some answers for your little one and she continues to surprise everyone. She obviously has a strong mum and that will be in her genes xxxx

@LittleAcorn20 I agree. My DD is a Jan 2021 baby, pregnancy was neglected a lot by my community midwife. Very little support. Last time I saw my health visitor was when DD was 6 months old, before that was birth.

@TeddyBeans that's so exciting!! Do you have a feeling of what you're having?

@Babynum2 just seen you replied to me about the breast pumps and bottle refusers.
Thanks for sharing your experience. This baby is going to be familiarised with bottles early doors! I'm so happy to read a few experiences where it hasn't caused baby to then go on to reject the boob and it hasn't affected supply! Yay ☺️ there's hope for spending some of the baby's first year out without them 🥂

@Franklin321 I'm in the opposite situation, all girls my side of the family so everyone's desperate for a boy. I honestly don't really care, although I'm already convinced it's another girl and only look at girls clothes and names 🤣 can't wait to find out though so everyone will stop bugging me about it

@alotoftutus hope you get your rest 💛 all will become clearer with a little time and patience and I'm sure you've got the strength deep down to face up. Ultimately I think she was just a bit behind with getting on the move and I think her proportions might even out in time too. It's not noticeable to the untrained eye, only on her growth charts 🤷‍♀️ she's perfect. I wonder if there won't ever really be answers as they're searching for something that doesn't exist.
But I wanted to share because I really understand the worry. Hand on heart I do.

@TTC24 here's to a pandemic free pregnancy and maternity leave for us this time 🙏 with hopefully better support and more opportunities for baby classes, sharing the newborn days with our wider family and lots of normality!

@XjustagirlX and others - I'm very pro-formula feeding. If any wants to talk/needs support because they don't feel like breastfeeding is for them/wants reassurance that they aren't harming their child by formula feeding, I am always here for it. Glad to see there are other who happily support breastfeeding, too. Let's be a supportive community for each other, regardless of what everyone feels is right for themselves and their families when it comes to feeding their babies.

@TTC24 I think another boy but I'm secretly hoping that by trying to convince myself that it is a boy, I'll be spectacularly wrong again and actually have a girl 😂 trying to reverse psych myself

@EMcG3 👏👏 well said. We are here to lift each other up and encourage and support with the knowledge we have from our own different experiences ☺️

@TeddyBeans this is what I did to myself in my first pregnancy, reverse psych'd myself to tell myself it was a boy because deep down I knew I wanted a girl ... But by preparing for it to be a boy thought I'd be less disappointed if it was 🤣
This time round, I'm happy with either. As you said earlier, I'd like all the old baby clothes back out the loft and deciding to get pregnant during a cost of living crisis wasn't the wisest move, so it'd be easier on the bank balance to haha!!
Excited to know what you find out later this month 😁

@LittleAcorn20 definitely happy either way. With the almost 5 year age gap when tiny comes along it might be easier to have another boy so DS and tiny have things in common. But I also feel like he'd be the most amazing, protective big brother to a little girl that it makes my heart melt just thinking about it 🥰🥰

This is great to know. Thank you for leaving such a lovely message here - exactly what I needed to see.
I'm a first time Mum, and the idea of breastfeeding just makes me feel really...cringe inside. I can't explain it, just doesn't feel right to me.
I've been reading the pros almost to try and convince myself, but I just don't think it's for me.
My partner is pretty happy about it as he sees it as meaning he can be more involved with all parts.
However, I have felt a bit pressured by the outside world, so it's really reassuring to see that there are others who support formula feeding.

i just came back off holiday and didn’t realise you should wear pregnancy safe sun cream :/ just had an update on a pregnancy app about entering 11 weeks and it mentions it on there. Anyone else aware of this? It’s made me worry x

@botleybump same!! Breastfeeding gives me the ick thinking about it. I’ll try, but no pressure on myself.
I don’t think breast is best, I think fed is best.

@hol92 yes, depending on the ingredients it can cause some rare conditions in the baby , but before you worry, check the ingredients list, maybe your bottle didn’t have that one 🤞

@hol92 ive never heard of this before! Surely if it was a serious thing to be aware of it would be well known within pregnancy?! I’ve just used whatever cream I’ve got around, not thought twice about it tbh!

I just checked and there is one harmful ingredient in there - Octocrylene it’s not the worst one but still classed as one to avoid! I honestly had no idea you have to check sun cream @Franklin321 I also just use whatever is there :/ and didn’t think twice about it - another thing to add to the worry pile! X

feel so worried now, like you say why is it not well known, I didn’t think about this at all and wouldn’t have known without it being for the baby centre app giving me a week update! Now I just feel so guilty that I have used something that may be harmful :(

@hol92 I really wouldn’t worry, I never heard about this in my previous pregnancy and have lots of friends who are pregnant or have little ones who have also never said anything! It’s not included on the nhs pregnancy website so I doubt midwives etc would even have anything to say about it!

@hol92 I've never heard of this before! I go away in 10 days and just have my normal suncream! Might message my midwife 😂

@hol92 im sure it will be fine dont worry yourself! Thankyou for sharing though im off to majorca in 3 weeks so i will have to have a look at what is recommended.

I’ve heard of it, same as ingredients in makeup and other skincare you may apply.

Just choose sunscreen that’s meant for kids like Child’s Farm doesn’t have any of the main dangerous ingredients