Due April/May after MC 🌈

[BellaBella38]

Hi everyone, I know this is might be a bit early to start a thread but after more than 2 1/2 years of trying the overwhelming excitement is real!

Me and my husband lost out first at 10 weeks back in December 2020 and to be honest had kind of given up. I only peed on a stick at 16DPO because a banana repulsed me to the point of spitting it out! Trying not to be too excited or paranoid, but we'll see how that goes. 🤣

I've ordered the Pregnancy after Loss book by Zoe Coates Clark in an attempt to keep my sanity, but the going to the loo fear of seeing blood is real. And I've booked an apt to talk to my GP on Thursday at 5+3 to talk about whether or not progesterone would be appropriate.

Thankfully my husband is level headed and reminds me not to get too ahead of myself yet, but it would be great to meet others in the same boat for a hand hold.

@MO22 it was about 2-3tbsp of red blood over a morning, then a couple of bits of brown blood. Now every now and then get a bit of brown spotting. Scan at 8+3 found what they thought was a subchorionic haematoma.

I think it's worth mentioning anything you're worried about at the booking appt, especially if you haven't had a scan? But fair warning the midwife who did mine was pretty disinterested in how my pregnancy had been so far - there wasn't even a section on the form she was working through about signs and symptoms like that and she wasn't interested in the scan reports or anything. I suspect that on early symptoms the EPAU nurses are a bit more engaged than the regular midwives.

@Janefx40 I know, right! Ten days away. Already getting anxious 😂😩

I’m now 10+3. I’ve been having odd short pains in my uterus. It’s not frequent only on odd occasions. Yesterday I had the wet underwear issue that I haven’t had in weeks. Plus I might have low iron, I had to give another blood sample and I’m waiting to hear back. My scan isnt for another three weeks, so just hoping all of the above is still normal and not signs.

Blue - painful cramps including lighting shoots in cervix, uterus, abdomen are all normal in first tri. What do you mean wet underwear? If you mean discharge, mine has been constant!

@Melusina123 thanks - I've had a scan but I just have weird discharge to be honest still. I went in because it was brown spotting, but since then I've had almost yellow or maybe it's drying yellow, and a little bit of brown stuff as well. She did show me something on the scan and said bleeding could be from that, but I was so anxious at the time I don't really remember. She definitely didn't say it was haematoma.

Driving me mental.

I'll mention it but I had the same experience with my first miscarriage and the booking appt - not hugely interested in symptoms etc, just a lot of questions to go through.

@MO22 It doesn't sound like anything of concern in terms of miscarriage but maybe an infection or something that needs treating. I'm sure there's nothing I can tell you about it that you haven't already read but definitely tell the midwife and if she's not interested, how about your GP?

@Janefx40 yes you're probably right. I'm a bit annoyed with my GP surgery however, I take thyroid medication and it needs to be increased for the first trimester. I waited four weeks for a telephone call with the GP yesterday but no one rang and when I spoke to the surgery the said the appt had never been booked! Which is mad because I spoke to the receptionist for about 20 mins freaking out!

So not sure how long I'll have to wait for another (telephone) appt. It's pretty bad in my part of London at the moment. Will see if the midwife can do anything on Monday, but it's definitely additional stress!

Hi all it’s just a weird time isn’t it! I’m officially 11+6 today and haven’t seen baby on a scan since 8+1 (almost 4 weeks!) so I am having days where I think has it all ended. I’m also really starting to worry about NT scan results even if everything is ok and how would I cope with an additional needs baby with my daughter and work and a dog etc too so there’s always something to worry about.

my scan is Monday at 1:30 when I will be 12+1. I’m dreading it (after 2 MMC) and I’m going to have to go alone as we can’t get any childcare for DD. Husband will sit right outside in waiting room but hospital very very strict on no children.

I’m definitely starting to show a bit already and as I’ve only been able to eat chips and nuggets due to everything else making me feel sick I’ve definitely put on weight! Feeling like I’ve got a bump already would make it even more heartbreaking if something hasn’t worked out I think.

great to have a thread we are all in the same boat and understand each other!

I would deffo mention to midwive @MO22 and ask for swab sample to be taken as sounds like possible infection to me. At least it rules it out if it’s tested and you can stop worrying completely find something else to worry about 😂🙈

@IWillBeWaxingAnOwl it’s either very watery discharge or wee. I’m not certain. Yes I keep trying to ignore the odd pains and convince myself it’s normal.

@Mrs173 hope it all goes well. That will be my gap too, I had a scan at 9+0 and the next is 13+2.

Similar gap @Mrs173 @Blue2020 - last scan was 8+4, next 12+6. Seems long!

Way too long. When is your scan booked @IWillBeWaxingAnOwl @Blue2020 i just want mine over now. We are still in secret here too so it’s hard to keep my anxieties to myself!(and DH of course)

9th November @Mrs173 . I have told a few friends but not told parents yet. Felt a bit shitty as they were asking all about fertility treatment today, so was having to tell some non truths! Last time taking it back at 12 weeks was just the worst thing. We would probably even tell them if we had another loss but I just can't stand saying woohoo then having to break bad news again.

@IWillBeWaxingAnOwl mine is the 9th Nov too! I will be 11+6...
Feel exactly the same, last time we had a scan at 9.5 weeks and told some close friends, and then had to take it back 2 weeks later which was just awful. So only my mum and sister now know, but it's so hard - I work in advertising which is a very alcohol dominated industry and I've already had two people ask me if I'm pregnant which is really not ok! I've also avoided my friends this month because it's easier than lying to them! Quite hard but I always remember the pain of having to tell people we had a MC - I'm completely with you, I probably would tell close ones if we have another MC but I can't do the take back again.

@Mrs173 also good luck for your scan tomorrow!

Thank you @MO22 sooo nervous now.

im the same as you both @IWillBeWaxingAnOwl the first Mc I had I told my mum and sister a week before my sister had her baby as I was so excited we were pregnant together then I had to tell them both when my nephew was only 2 weeks old and I felt so awful like I’d ruined it for her and then she stopped sharing photos on the family WhatsApp group etc to try protect me but it probably isolated me more and everytime I held my nephew for a couple of weeks I got upset thinking I’d never have this. The next Mc I told her after (because she was talking about Mc and other losses and it was when I was waiting for an MvA opp so I just started crying!) i have one daughter who I’m so incredibly grateful for and I had subchoronic Haematoma with her so a few huge scary bleeds and I told them I was pregnant with her by crying that I was sure I was having another Mc but they wouldn’t scan me due to covid - obvs that all turned out nicely but I’d love to be able to tell them and feel excited as this would be our last baby. I also feel like I can’t possibly go through the first 12 weeks ever again! Anyone else feel like that?! It’s just exhausting- physically and emotionally and I never want to do it again 🙈

@Mrs173 I absolutely feel like that. I've started wondering what I will do if this pregnancy doesn't work out. I've had 2 miscarriages this year and I dread the thought of having another miscarriage and then having to go through it again. I'm very lucky that I already have one child and Ive started to wonder what it would be like having a one child family. I wish that this was what I wanted because there are definitely a lot of good things about having only one child but I know I would regret not trying harder especially because I'm only 36 so I still feel like I have time to have another. I just don't want to have to go through any more heartbreak to get one..

@MO22 it's so hard when people directly challenge like that. Like mind your own fecking business and just think if someone hasn't told you something there is a good reason for that.

According to previous scan, I should be more like 12+4 at this scan, but we will see.

@Anoushka1986 @Mrs173 I understand the feel of "this 10 weeks better not be for nothing" cause first trimester is hard with the nausea, tiredbess, soreness. We don't already have a child so we definitely would fire up to go again.

@IWillBeWaxingAnOwl Yep I'm in the same boat, no children yet so it would be get back in the saddle and go again. Praying that we don't have to, it feels cruel and like a nightmare to do the same 12 weeks over and over.

I'm 8 weeks today and the next four weeks feel like an absolute ETERNITY stretching before me...

Hi everyone.

@Mrs173 good luck tomorrow xxx

@MO22 People are so insensitive just asking - I think you should feel confident about just lying and saying no. It's hard but really why should we tell our most personal information to people we barely know because they're silly enough to ask - am sure they don't mean anything but it's just thoughtless!

Oh I have every hope for all of us and all of our beans 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

I’m struggling with conflict of emotions at the moment
My due date of our twin pregnancy is Thursday and I’ll be 11 weeks pregnant
My friend is getting ready to meet her daughter and I can’t help but feel jealous and sad that I should be at that stage with the twins
My 12 week scan is 28th October - I’ve never been this far in pregnancy and I just can’t imagine the feeling of seeing a healthy baby on the screen. Part of me worries I’ll hear “sorry, there’s no heart beat” but part of me is hoping that a good 12 week scan will help my fear of scans that I developed because of my last pregnancies

I spent most of my life waiting and looking forward to be a mum, I expected pregnancy to be this amazing experience with exciting scans but loss has definitely taken that away from me. I have a few friends pregnant for the first time and are always buzzing for their scans, I feel like that has been stolen from us who have lost

@Essexgalhere - I really relate to the feeling that the excitement has been stolen xx

Yup @IWillBeWaxingAnOwl @Essexgalhere I was thinking the same thing this morning. I've got my dating scan tomorrow and there's going to be all these excited couples in the waiting room whilst we're just sitting there terrified.

Oh what time are you @BellaBella38 are you 12 weeks? I’m tomorrow too at 1:30 so I’m right there with you. I’ve had 2 scans now with bad news and 1 healthy daughter so I know it can go right but I’m so worried. My husband thinks I’m being silly and it will all be fine but it’s always in the back of my mind. Even worse this will be the first time he can’t come in with me as we have no childcare for our daughter.

hoping it all goes well for both of us! Xx